Scattered, chapter 7
AT THE HOSPITAL
"And that was Green day with Longview." The radioman said.
"I knew he'd go far." I said lying in bed.
"Miss we have found out when you can leave the hospital and go home."
"Ok when?"
"About 3 more years, we still have a bit more test to do on you, and we must get you walking again."
Since Billie was gone May had took a turn for the worst. She wasn't eating right, she stopped trying to walk, so her legs were weak again, and she stopped getting regular haircuts, and high lights. She was letting herself fall apart.
"All right well let's start now." I said getting out of bed.
"Hold on, let me help you Miss."
"No, I'm fine I can stand I just can't walk."
"All right well give me your hand and we'll take a few steps. Ready?"
"Yah." I tried to walk, but it didn't work out to well. I seemed to trip over my own feet, and they just wouldn't move, it was like they were cemented into the floor.
"Miss your doing a good job."
"I haven't moved a step, I'm not doing a good job!"
"Miss this is going to take time."
"I know. I want to lay back down now." I said.
"All right Miss." I lay back down and the doctor left.
3 Days later.
"Dawna are you shear you don't wanna come with us?
"No Billie, go have fun, I'll be waiting here for you, when you come back."
"Dawna, Krystal and Ellie are coming. Why don't you?"
"Cause I don't think sitting in a bus for hours on end is for me."
"We could do something. You could learn to play the guitar."
"Yah, but I don't think I'd be into that, it would take way to long, and it looks hared."
"Well, it would take a little, and its not to hared once you get the hang of it. And if playin guitar was, easy everyone would be playin it.
"No, it's ok. I'll stay here and make shear the house is doing ok, and stuff like that."
"Whatever." Billie left with out kissing Dawna goodbye. He was mad, it wasn't just the whole not wanting to go on tour with him, but it seemed like Dawna was growing descendent from Billie, and never wanted to do anything with him.
TOUR BUS
"Hey. Why didn't Dawna come? Krystal asked.
"Cuz she didn't want to. I can't stand her. She never wants to do anything."
"Well, was she like that when you guys first started going out?"
"No. I mean she loved going out with me, we'd see movies, go eat at restaurants, go out for walks, even hold hands. But now it seems like she wants nothing to do with me anymore."
"What do you mean?" Ellie asked.
"I mean she won't even kiss me, every time I go to kiss her she moves away. She won't hold my hand, or anything. She hardly every talks to me, and she's always on the phone"
"Maybe she's just. I don't know, Maybe she's not who you thought she was."
"Yah, or is it possible, that you just don't love her anymore.
"Billie, loves Dawna don't be ridiculous Krystal." Ellie interrupted.
"Ummm." Billie sided.
"You do love her, don't you?" Ellie asked.
"Yah, ahh, no, I mean, ahhh yah I do, ahhh... . oh god who knows."
"Billie, you should."
"I know, I know. I mean I did at one point. I mean it wasn't the same kind of love that I had for May. But I did and do love Dawna. It just doesn't fell the same though."
"Billie, the love you had for May was built over time. Maybe you should give you and Dawna a little more time."
"Yah I guess your right."
After Billie Krystal and Ellie finished there talk, Billie went to get some sleep. Confused and laying there, Billie started to think about Dawna, and May. Billie ended up going up front to see Mike cuz he couldn't fall asleep.
"Hey why aren't you sleeping?"
"Can't sleep. Thinkin about to much."
"Really. Ummm what are the girls and Tre doing?"
"I don't know, the only thing I know is that, Ellie's sleeping."
"Oh, ok. So what's buggin you buddy?"
"Dawna, May, life, lies. I don't know."
"Sounds like you havin some problems."
"Yah, you can say that again."
"Sounds." Mike started again but Billie cut him off.
"Smart ass."
"Yah I know. Now lets get down to business. Who's lying to you?"
"Myself."
"What? Well I can't help you there. How are you lying to yourself?" Mike asked puzzled.
"I keep on tellin myself everything's going to be fine. But I know its just lies. I can hardly trust anyone, but when it gets to the point where I can't trust myself anymore. Man I don't thing that's a good thing."
"Well then stop lying to yourself. Now what's up with Dawna?"
"Who, knows Dawna's way out there."
"She's can't be that bad."
"Well, I guess not. But I still have a spot in my heart for May."
"Billie you always will, and there's nothing you can do about it. Until you move on."
"Maybe I should forget about them both, and live life on my own."
"Billie I know, and you know, you don't wanna do that."
"Yah, I guess your right, I mean its just getting so hared."
"Hared what do you mean? You better not be, being stupid."
"No I'm not. I mean life is hared enough, but then to be thinking about May, and trying to have sex with Dawna. Doesn't work out to well."
"Billie why'd you tell me that for?"
"I don't know, wasn't thinking. Anyways thanks for listening I'm going to lay down."
When Billie went back to lay down he made shear he was quite so he didn't wake Ellie, who was still sleeping. Billie lay there, tossing and turning, thinking about May and Dawna. He was having problems sleeping. He had tried everything from counting sheep, to closing his eyes. So he got up and grabbed a piece of paper and a pen and began writing.
"I'm having trouble trying to sleep, I'm counting sheep but running out, As time ticks by, And still I try, No rest for cross tops in my mind, On my own... here we go." Billie stopped there, not know anything else to write. He lay back down, and it took him about an hour to fall asleep.
The next morning Billie woke up and finished the song he ended up calling it brain stew.
"So did you have a good sleep?"
"Yah, I'll drive now if you'd like."
"All right. Is Ellie still sleeping?"
"Yah."
"Ok thanks."
"And that was Green day with Longview." The radioman said.
"I knew he'd go far." I said lying in bed.
"Miss we have found out when you can leave the hospital and go home."
"Ok when?"
"About 3 more years, we still have a bit more test to do on you, and we must get you walking again."
Since Billie was gone May had took a turn for the worst. She wasn't eating right, she stopped trying to walk, so her legs were weak again, and she stopped getting regular haircuts, and high lights. She was letting herself fall apart.
"All right well let's start now." I said getting out of bed.
"Hold on, let me help you Miss."
"No, I'm fine I can stand I just can't walk."
"All right well give me your hand and we'll take a few steps. Ready?"
"Yah." I tried to walk, but it didn't work out to well. I seemed to trip over my own feet, and they just wouldn't move, it was like they were cemented into the floor.
"Miss your doing a good job."
"I haven't moved a step, I'm not doing a good job!"
"Miss this is going to take time."
"I know. I want to lay back down now." I said.
"All right Miss." I lay back down and the doctor left.
3 Days later.
"Dawna are you shear you don't wanna come with us?
"No Billie, go have fun, I'll be waiting here for you, when you come back."
"Dawna, Krystal and Ellie are coming. Why don't you?"
"Cause I don't think sitting in a bus for hours on end is for me."
"We could do something. You could learn to play the guitar."
"Yah, but I don't think I'd be into that, it would take way to long, and it looks hared."
"Well, it would take a little, and its not to hared once you get the hang of it. And if playin guitar was, easy everyone would be playin it.
"No, it's ok. I'll stay here and make shear the house is doing ok, and stuff like that."
"Whatever." Billie left with out kissing Dawna goodbye. He was mad, it wasn't just the whole not wanting to go on tour with him, but it seemed like Dawna was growing descendent from Billie, and never wanted to do anything with him.
TOUR BUS
"Hey. Why didn't Dawna come? Krystal asked.
"Cuz she didn't want to. I can't stand her. She never wants to do anything."
"Well, was she like that when you guys first started going out?"
"No. I mean she loved going out with me, we'd see movies, go eat at restaurants, go out for walks, even hold hands. But now it seems like she wants nothing to do with me anymore."
"What do you mean?" Ellie asked.
"I mean she won't even kiss me, every time I go to kiss her she moves away. She won't hold my hand, or anything. She hardly every talks to me, and she's always on the phone"
"Maybe she's just. I don't know, Maybe she's not who you thought she was."
"Yah, or is it possible, that you just don't love her anymore.
"Billie, loves Dawna don't be ridiculous Krystal." Ellie interrupted.
"Ummm." Billie sided.
"You do love her, don't you?" Ellie asked.
"Yah, ahh, no, I mean, ahhh yah I do, ahhh... . oh god who knows."
"Billie, you should."
"I know, I know. I mean I did at one point. I mean it wasn't the same kind of love that I had for May. But I did and do love Dawna. It just doesn't fell the same though."
"Billie, the love you had for May was built over time. Maybe you should give you and Dawna a little more time."
"Yah I guess your right."
After Billie Krystal and Ellie finished there talk, Billie went to get some sleep. Confused and laying there, Billie started to think about Dawna, and May. Billie ended up going up front to see Mike cuz he couldn't fall asleep.
"Hey why aren't you sleeping?"
"Can't sleep. Thinkin about to much."
"Really. Ummm what are the girls and Tre doing?"
"I don't know, the only thing I know is that, Ellie's sleeping."
"Oh, ok. So what's buggin you buddy?"
"Dawna, May, life, lies. I don't know."
"Sounds like you havin some problems."
"Yah, you can say that again."
"Sounds." Mike started again but Billie cut him off.
"Smart ass."
"Yah I know. Now lets get down to business. Who's lying to you?"
"Myself."
"What? Well I can't help you there. How are you lying to yourself?" Mike asked puzzled.
"I keep on tellin myself everything's going to be fine. But I know its just lies. I can hardly trust anyone, but when it gets to the point where I can't trust myself anymore. Man I don't thing that's a good thing."
"Well then stop lying to yourself. Now what's up with Dawna?"
"Who, knows Dawna's way out there."
"She's can't be that bad."
"Well, I guess not. But I still have a spot in my heart for May."
"Billie you always will, and there's nothing you can do about it. Until you move on."
"Maybe I should forget about them both, and live life on my own."
"Billie I know, and you know, you don't wanna do that."
"Yah, I guess your right, I mean its just getting so hared."
"Hared what do you mean? You better not be, being stupid."
"No I'm not. I mean life is hared enough, but then to be thinking about May, and trying to have sex with Dawna. Doesn't work out to well."
"Billie why'd you tell me that for?"
"I don't know, wasn't thinking. Anyways thanks for listening I'm going to lay down."
When Billie went back to lay down he made shear he was quite so he didn't wake Ellie, who was still sleeping. Billie lay there, tossing and turning, thinking about May and Dawna. He was having problems sleeping. He had tried everything from counting sheep, to closing his eyes. So he got up and grabbed a piece of paper and a pen and began writing.
"I'm having trouble trying to sleep, I'm counting sheep but running out, As time ticks by, And still I try, No rest for cross tops in my mind, On my own... here we go." Billie stopped there, not know anything else to write. He lay back down, and it took him about an hour to fall asleep.
The next morning Billie woke up and finished the song he ended up calling it brain stew.
"So did you have a good sleep?"
"Yah, I'll drive now if you'd like."
"All right. Is Ellie still sleeping?"
"Yah."
"Ok thanks."
