Worlds Apart, chapter 3
In my defence, I hadn’t been this trashed in a long time and I wasn’t completely aware of what I was doing. Secondly, we are talking about Billie Joe Armstrong here, and this much I was aware of. Things got out of control fairly quickly, I think because we were both so goddamn drunk. One thing I can be sure of is that I had never ever felt this kind of passion with Tom. This was something else. As he kissed my neck I had trouble remembering to breathe.
“Oh my…fuck� he muttered as his lips landed on mine again, suggesting he was as taken aback by the ferocious intensity of the situation as I was. I pulled his shirt over his head and he did the same to me. I let my hands rest on his cool skin.
“Billie Joe…� I whispered between kisses,
“Hmmm?� he murmured. But I didn’t know what to say.
It wasn’t until I had slipped the studded belt out of the belt loops that he forced us to regain some control of the situation.
“Soph…� he said, breathlessly, “Jesus Christ…I don’t have anything�
I hadn’t thought about that.
“Fuck. Nor do I� I said.
“If you want this…I can run to the bathroom outside and get some�
“Do you?�
“That isn’t obvious?�
I giggled.
“Wait here� he said, kissing me again before standing up, fixing his belt and running out of the door. In less than 30 seconds he was back.
“You got one?�
“I got three�
I grinned and kissed him again as he moved me backwards towards the bed. I swear I’m not the kind of girl who usually does things like this. I’m not normally this reckless, or even just this spontaneous. But that night was different. I don’t know if it was the effect of the drugs or just of Billie Joe but I know I just wasn’t thinking at all right then. And it was incredible. Afterwards we sank back into the pillows, kissing gently, breathlessly before he said,
“Well, that was unexpected�
“That was amazing� I said,
“Amazing� he agreed, “You’re amazing�
“And we still have two more times left.�
***
The next morning I woke up dazed and confused. A strange buzzing sound filled the room, my head felt foggy and I had no idea where I was. I focussed my eyes on the glowing red numbers on the bedside table. 7:30. It was only two and a half hours since I’d gone to sleep, but I didn’t realise that at the time. Hell, I couldn’t even work out what day it was. I eventually figured out that the Green Day gig had been the night before and that, hey, I met Green Day last night! Wait, Green Day…I met…Oh my God. I jerked my head to the right, making my vision spin until the sleepy body next to me came into focus. I slept with Billie Joe. He groaned as he reached out to stop the buzzing, which turned out to be coming from the alarm clock, not just from inside my head.
“Hey� he said sleepily.
“Hi� I said, my voice shaking slightly.
“Sorry about the fucking alarm. We’re going to Glasgow today�
I nodded, surveying the empty beer bottles and the smoking paraphernalia strewn across the floor. What a night.
“Are you ok?� he asked me, looking concerned.
“Yeah…just a little hung-over� I said, suddenly aware I was wearing nothing but a baggy t shirt which I assumed to be Billie Joe’s.
“We drank a- LOT� he said
“I know� I said, rubbing my temples.
He turned his head to face me.
“Look, Sophie…I just wanna say…I didn’t plan this ok…I don’t normally invite girls back to my hotel rooms…I don’t want you to feel…� he trailed off.
“Used?� I offered with a smile “It’s ok. I don’t. We were both really drunk. It was fun at the time�
I thought I was doing a pretty good job of sounding chilled out about the situation.
“It was, right?� he smiled. He paused then said “When did you put that shirt on?�
I looked down. I was wearing a black Operation Ivy T shirt. It was huge on me, and the letters were so faded you could barely make out what it said.
“I don’t remember� I said,
“I’ve had that shirt since I was 16.� He grinned, “I would never soberly let anyone borrow that�
I laughed, then got out of the bed as slowly as possible to minimise painful jerky head movements. I went into the en-suite bathroom and stared at my reflection. My eye makeup was a disaster. I put last nights clothes back on, and wished they didn’t smell so much of alcohol, weed and mosh pit. Then I washed my face and, on discovering Billie Joe’s eyeliner next to the sink called out,
“Can I borrow your eyeliner?�
“I don’t know about that� he said, appearing in the doorway�.
He had put jeans on. He looked good. I couldn’t remember having ever seen him in jeans.
“Why not?�
“I don’t hand eyeliner out to just anybody� he smirked. I loved that smirk.
“Oh come on. It’s really cool liquidy eyeliner�
“Ok, ok, you can take the damn eyeliner.� He said, rubbing his head so his hair looked even messier, “Here, I’ll do it�
“Do what?�
“The eyeliner. I’m practically an expert�
I laughed,
“You want to apply my eyeliner?�
“Yep� said, taking it from my hand. I felt nervous as he put the brush next to my eye.
“You’ve got the hangover shakes� I said, “You’d better not poke my eye�
“I won’t� he smiled, rolling his eyes.
I watched the concentration on his face as the brush touched my skin. His face was so close to mine that it took all my concentration to avoid his eye contact. He had the most incredible eyes and getting lost in them right then would be the worst thing I could do. Because I knew my time with him had run out. This was a one-night stand with a famous rock star. I knew I’d never see him again.
“See� he said, “No smudges, no eye poking�
I looked in the mirror. He’d done a good job.
“Thanks� I smiled, “I guess you are an expert. Its good eyeliner too�
“Well, It looks good on you� he said
I smiled, and he smiled too. Damn him. He was turning those eyes on me.
“Well…� I said, “I guess this is it. I should be getting going�
He nodded, not breaking our eye contact. I couldn’t believe it was over and I had to go. I don’t think I’ve ever found it so hard to leave a place.
“I should too� he said, “Got to get back on the bus I guess�
I nodded, biting my lip, forcing myself to stay composed. He stood up from the bed and we walked towards the door of his suite.
“It was…amazing to meet you Billie� I told him
“It was amazing to meet you� he replied, “And…I hope everything works out for you, y’know…�
I nodded. Then he pulled me into a hug. I breathed in the scent of his shirt and felt a painful lump rise in my throat. I forced it back down.
“Bye Soph� he said,
“Bye Billie Joe� I said, forcing a smile. Then we released each other.
I opened the door and strode out into the corridor without looking back. It wasn’t until I heard his door click shut behind me that my tears came.
“Oh my…fuck� he muttered as his lips landed on mine again, suggesting he was as taken aback by the ferocious intensity of the situation as I was. I pulled his shirt over his head and he did the same to me. I let my hands rest on his cool skin.
“Billie Joe…� I whispered between kisses,
“Hmmm?� he murmured. But I didn’t know what to say.
It wasn’t until I had slipped the studded belt out of the belt loops that he forced us to regain some control of the situation.
“Soph…� he said, breathlessly, “Jesus Christ…I don’t have anything�
I hadn’t thought about that.
“Fuck. Nor do I� I said.
“If you want this…I can run to the bathroom outside and get some�
“Do you?�
“That isn’t obvious?�
I giggled.
“Wait here� he said, kissing me again before standing up, fixing his belt and running out of the door. In less than 30 seconds he was back.
“You got one?�
“I got three�
I grinned and kissed him again as he moved me backwards towards the bed. I swear I’m not the kind of girl who usually does things like this. I’m not normally this reckless, or even just this spontaneous. But that night was different. I don’t know if it was the effect of the drugs or just of Billie Joe but I know I just wasn’t thinking at all right then. And it was incredible. Afterwards we sank back into the pillows, kissing gently, breathlessly before he said,
“Well, that was unexpected�
“That was amazing� I said,
“Amazing� he agreed, “You’re amazing�
“And we still have two more times left.�
***
The next morning I woke up dazed and confused. A strange buzzing sound filled the room, my head felt foggy and I had no idea where I was. I focussed my eyes on the glowing red numbers on the bedside table. 7:30. It was only two and a half hours since I’d gone to sleep, but I didn’t realise that at the time. Hell, I couldn’t even work out what day it was. I eventually figured out that the Green Day gig had been the night before and that, hey, I met Green Day last night! Wait, Green Day…I met…Oh my God. I jerked my head to the right, making my vision spin until the sleepy body next to me came into focus. I slept with Billie Joe. He groaned as he reached out to stop the buzzing, which turned out to be coming from the alarm clock, not just from inside my head.
“Hey� he said sleepily.
“Hi� I said, my voice shaking slightly.
“Sorry about the fucking alarm. We’re going to Glasgow today�
I nodded, surveying the empty beer bottles and the smoking paraphernalia strewn across the floor. What a night.
“Are you ok?� he asked me, looking concerned.
“Yeah…just a little hung-over� I said, suddenly aware I was wearing nothing but a baggy t shirt which I assumed to be Billie Joe’s.
“We drank a- LOT� he said
“I know� I said, rubbing my temples.
He turned his head to face me.
“Look, Sophie…I just wanna say…I didn’t plan this ok…I don’t normally invite girls back to my hotel rooms…I don’t want you to feel…� he trailed off.
“Used?� I offered with a smile “It’s ok. I don’t. We were both really drunk. It was fun at the time�
I thought I was doing a pretty good job of sounding chilled out about the situation.
“It was, right?� he smiled. He paused then said “When did you put that shirt on?�
I looked down. I was wearing a black Operation Ivy T shirt. It was huge on me, and the letters were so faded you could barely make out what it said.
“I don’t remember� I said,
“I’ve had that shirt since I was 16.� He grinned, “I would never soberly let anyone borrow that�
I laughed, then got out of the bed as slowly as possible to minimise painful jerky head movements. I went into the en-suite bathroom and stared at my reflection. My eye makeup was a disaster. I put last nights clothes back on, and wished they didn’t smell so much of alcohol, weed and mosh pit. Then I washed my face and, on discovering Billie Joe’s eyeliner next to the sink called out,
“Can I borrow your eyeliner?�
“I don’t know about that� he said, appearing in the doorway�.
He had put jeans on. He looked good. I couldn’t remember having ever seen him in jeans.
“Why not?�
“I don’t hand eyeliner out to just anybody� he smirked. I loved that smirk.
“Oh come on. It’s really cool liquidy eyeliner�
“Ok, ok, you can take the damn eyeliner.� He said, rubbing his head so his hair looked even messier, “Here, I’ll do it�
“Do what?�
“The eyeliner. I’m practically an expert�
I laughed,
“You want to apply my eyeliner?�
“Yep� said, taking it from my hand. I felt nervous as he put the brush next to my eye.
“You’ve got the hangover shakes� I said, “You’d better not poke my eye�
“I won’t� he smiled, rolling his eyes.
I watched the concentration on his face as the brush touched my skin. His face was so close to mine that it took all my concentration to avoid his eye contact. He had the most incredible eyes and getting lost in them right then would be the worst thing I could do. Because I knew my time with him had run out. This was a one-night stand with a famous rock star. I knew I’d never see him again.
“See� he said, “No smudges, no eye poking�
I looked in the mirror. He’d done a good job.
“Thanks� I smiled, “I guess you are an expert. Its good eyeliner too�
“Well, It looks good on you� he said
I smiled, and he smiled too. Damn him. He was turning those eyes on me.
“Well…� I said, “I guess this is it. I should be getting going�
He nodded, not breaking our eye contact. I couldn’t believe it was over and I had to go. I don’t think I’ve ever found it so hard to leave a place.
“I should too� he said, “Got to get back on the bus I guess�
I nodded, biting my lip, forcing myself to stay composed. He stood up from the bed and we walked towards the door of his suite.
“It was…amazing to meet you Billie� I told him
“It was amazing to meet you� he replied, “And…I hope everything works out for you, y’know…�
I nodded. Then he pulled me into a hug. I breathed in the scent of his shirt and felt a painful lump rise in my throat. I forced it back down.
“Bye Soph� he said,
“Bye Billie Joe� I said, forcing a smile. Then we released each other.
I opened the door and strode out into the corridor without looking back. It wasn’t until I heard his door click shut behind me that my tears came.
