You'll Be In My Heart, chapter 5
I stopped writing to think for a moment. "What else could come next?" ran through my mind. I was stuck, surprisingly. Usually my brain
swarmed with ideas when it came to brainstorming songs. " ' I miss her? ' ...no.... ' No one understands, so fuck them? ' ...no.... ' We
are living in a love chamber within us? ' .......definitely not........
I sighed in disgust at how slowly my mind was working. I laid back, thinking of my love. My one true love, Adrienne. Her smiling face
appeared in my mind, causing my heart to beat in a race. I smiled, too, at the wonderful feeling of just picturing her face.
"God, she's so beautiful," I said softly aloud. The face within my mind seemed to smile even more at that. I did, too. It seemed forever since I
had ever seen her face in my mind like that. I missed her so dearly, I felt as if I was going to explode. Why did this have to be like this? Why do I have to
wait so long just to see her lovely face for real, or hear her beautiful voice?! I felt sadness suddenly spread through my body, causing a burn behind my
eyes. Two tears suddenly fell, one on each side, both trying to reach the bottom of my face the fastest. Suddenly I was snapped right out of my
thoughts at the sound of footsteps bounding closer. I quickly sat up, frantically wiping the tears from my eyes and shoving the notebook and pencil
back under the bunk. I crossed my arms before the person approached from behind.
"Billie, Rene'e's leaving. Aren't you going to say goodbye?" Tre' said to me as I was sitting up against the headboard. I looked up at him,
a little surprised.
"Man, your face is all red! Were you....crying?" he asked, lowering his voice and looking at me with an odd expression. I immediately put my
head down. "C'mon, c'mon...excuse...any excuse..." I thought quickly. I lifted my head back up, smiling. I rolled off the bed, standing down on the floor. I
patted Tre' on the shoulder.
"Nah, man. Why do you always ask me that?" I asked as we walked back out to the dining part of the tour bus.
"I haven't asked you that before. Have I?" Tre' asked, confused.
"Yeah you have," I answered. The tour bus was slowing down as we approached closer to West Palm Street.
"I have?" he asked once again. I ignored him this time. We just approached Mike and Rene'e who were sitting down at the table.
We all flinched as Mache' came to a sudden stop on the side of a road.
"Here you go, 10 West Palm Street!" Mache' exclaimed from the driver street. Rene'e stood up, hugging each one of us.
"Well, it was a big pleasure to meet you all!! Thanks so much for the ride!!" She said as she hugged me. Tre' looked baffled.
"What the hell? We gave you a ride all the way from Cleveland, Ohio to Los Angelos, California, and all we get is a fucking hug?! Come 'ere!"
Tre' exclaimed, grabbing Rene'e's arm and pulling her towards him. Rene'e screeched in laughter. Tre' leaned down and planted a kiss on her cheek.
She smiled.
"Alright, alright, we don't have all day," Mache' called back to us.
"Bye Rene'e," Mike said, patting her on the shoulder.
"Bye Mike," she said back as she turned and walked toward the door.
"Bye Rene'e," Tre' said, waving.
"Bye Tre'," she said, laughing.
"Bye Rene'e," I called.
She turned to face me. She smiled, waving. I waved back. Then the door squeaked a little and then opened. Rene'e headed down the stairs
and out the door. We all watched as she crossed the street to get to her house. Tre' suddenly ran up to where Mache' is. Next thing you know, a loud,
long, honk sounded from the tour bus. Rene'e turned around abruptly and started laughing, covering her ears. Mike and I waved out the other window
as Tre' came running back to us. Rene'e stood there, waving and smiling as the tour bus door closed and we were pulling away. We all waved back.
Soon we were passed her house.
"God, Tre'! That was fucking loud!!!" I exclaimed, slapping him on the back.
"What? I try to make all our fans happy!!" he said back, pinching me.
"Ow...ow...ow..." I winced in pain as he wouldn't let go of my skin.
"By blowing their eardrums out?! Nice way to make 'em happy!!" Mike said. "Tre', only girls pinch. Let go of Billie Joe."
"So...you're telling me this...why?" he smiled, still gripping my skin.
"Ow...Tre'...please!!" I begged, laughing and whining in pain. Mike reached over and pulled Tre's hand off of my skin.
"Ohhh...ahh./.I love you man," I said, relieved, as I put my arms around Mike and reached up to kiss him on the lips.
He pulled away. "Billie, I don't exactly feel in the mood to make out with you right now, if that's ok.." Mike said, smiling a little bit.
I smiled, kissing him on the cheek.
"Alright, alright, enough. Haha. I'm gonna go make another cup of coffee, if you all don't mind.." Tre' said, yawning and turning to the coffee
maker.
"I'm gonna go give Mache' some directions," Mike said.
"And I'm gonna go finish my song," I announced, turning and running to the back of the tour bus.
I jumped out onto my bed, laughing a little. I sighed, reaching down below and pulling out my notebook and pencil. I flipped to the page that had
my started song on it. I read the lyrics, "Well she said, 'I can't take this place. I'm leaving it behind.' Well she said, 'I can't take this place. I'm leaving you
tonight.' Somehow, I just could not grow from these words. Writer's Block. Ugh.
I begun to lay back, trying to think of more to say, or the music to go along with it. Somehow it just...wouldn't speak. I was totally stuck.
Everything I tried to hum seemed more similiar to other songs I had written, and I didn't want that to happen. I shook my head, growling a little. I felt a little
tired, so I leaned my head back, my eyes starting to shut...
swarmed with ideas when it came to brainstorming songs. " ' I miss her? ' ...no.... ' No one understands, so fuck them? ' ...no.... ' We
are living in a love chamber within us? ' .......definitely not........
I sighed in disgust at how slowly my mind was working. I laid back, thinking of my love. My one true love, Adrienne. Her smiling face
appeared in my mind, causing my heart to beat in a race. I smiled, too, at the wonderful feeling of just picturing her face.
"God, she's so beautiful," I said softly aloud. The face within my mind seemed to smile even more at that. I did, too. It seemed forever since I
had ever seen her face in my mind like that. I missed her so dearly, I felt as if I was going to explode. Why did this have to be like this? Why do I have to
wait so long just to see her lovely face for real, or hear her beautiful voice?! I felt sadness suddenly spread through my body, causing a burn behind my
eyes. Two tears suddenly fell, one on each side, both trying to reach the bottom of my face the fastest. Suddenly I was snapped right out of my
thoughts at the sound of footsteps bounding closer. I quickly sat up, frantically wiping the tears from my eyes and shoving the notebook and pencil
back under the bunk. I crossed my arms before the person approached from behind.
"Billie, Rene'e's leaving. Aren't you going to say goodbye?" Tre' said to me as I was sitting up against the headboard. I looked up at him,
a little surprised.
"Man, your face is all red! Were you....crying?" he asked, lowering his voice and looking at me with an odd expression. I immediately put my
head down. "C'mon, c'mon...excuse...any excuse..." I thought quickly. I lifted my head back up, smiling. I rolled off the bed, standing down on the floor. I
patted Tre' on the shoulder.
"Nah, man. Why do you always ask me that?" I asked as we walked back out to the dining part of the tour bus.
"I haven't asked you that before. Have I?" Tre' asked, confused.
"Yeah you have," I answered. The tour bus was slowing down as we approached closer to West Palm Street.
"I have?" he asked once again. I ignored him this time. We just approached Mike and Rene'e who were sitting down at the table.
We all flinched as Mache' came to a sudden stop on the side of a road.
"Here you go, 10 West Palm Street!" Mache' exclaimed from the driver street. Rene'e stood up, hugging each one of us.
"Well, it was a big pleasure to meet you all!! Thanks so much for the ride!!" She said as she hugged me. Tre' looked baffled.
"What the hell? We gave you a ride all the way from Cleveland, Ohio to Los Angelos, California, and all we get is a fucking hug?! Come 'ere!"
Tre' exclaimed, grabbing Rene'e's arm and pulling her towards him. Rene'e screeched in laughter. Tre' leaned down and planted a kiss on her cheek.
She smiled.
"Alright, alright, we don't have all day," Mache' called back to us.
"Bye Rene'e," Mike said, patting her on the shoulder.
"Bye Mike," she said back as she turned and walked toward the door.
"Bye Rene'e," Tre' said, waving.
"Bye Tre'," she said, laughing.
"Bye Rene'e," I called.
She turned to face me. She smiled, waving. I waved back. Then the door squeaked a little and then opened. Rene'e headed down the stairs
and out the door. We all watched as she crossed the street to get to her house. Tre' suddenly ran up to where Mache' is. Next thing you know, a loud,
long, honk sounded from the tour bus. Rene'e turned around abruptly and started laughing, covering her ears. Mike and I waved out the other window
as Tre' came running back to us. Rene'e stood there, waving and smiling as the tour bus door closed and we were pulling away. We all waved back.
Soon we were passed her house.
"God, Tre'! That was fucking loud!!!" I exclaimed, slapping him on the back.
"What? I try to make all our fans happy!!" he said back, pinching me.
"Ow...ow...ow..." I winced in pain as he wouldn't let go of my skin.
"By blowing their eardrums out?! Nice way to make 'em happy!!" Mike said. "Tre', only girls pinch. Let go of Billie Joe."
"So...you're telling me this...why?" he smiled, still gripping my skin.
"Ow...Tre'...please!!" I begged, laughing and whining in pain. Mike reached over and pulled Tre's hand off of my skin.
"Ohhh...ahh./.I love you man," I said, relieved, as I put my arms around Mike and reached up to kiss him on the lips.
He pulled away. "Billie, I don't exactly feel in the mood to make out with you right now, if that's ok.." Mike said, smiling a little bit.
I smiled, kissing him on the cheek.
"Alright, alright, enough. Haha. I'm gonna go make another cup of coffee, if you all don't mind.." Tre' said, yawning and turning to the coffee
maker.
"I'm gonna go give Mache' some directions," Mike said.
"And I'm gonna go finish my song," I announced, turning and running to the back of the tour bus.
I jumped out onto my bed, laughing a little. I sighed, reaching down below and pulling out my notebook and pencil. I flipped to the page that had
my started song on it. I read the lyrics, "Well she said, 'I can't take this place. I'm leaving it behind.' Well she said, 'I can't take this place. I'm leaving you
tonight.' Somehow, I just could not grow from these words. Writer's Block. Ugh.
I begun to lay back, trying to think of more to say, or the music to go along with it. Somehow it just...wouldn't speak. I was totally stuck.
Everything I tried to hum seemed more similiar to other songs I had written, and I didn't want that to happen. I shook my head, growling a little. I felt a little
tired, so I leaned my head back, my eyes starting to shut...
