Apparently, Childhood is the Best Hood., chapter 1
Sometimes I think this story would be told better if it were a movie.
But if it were a movie...I think people would say it ripped off another movie. Ha.
Despite my lack of expierce in writing, I thought it was nessecary to write down
what happens around me. Important or not. I often get bored and find myself mindlessly staring at my surroundings thinking can this.. wasteland become anything more than a complete and utter shithole? I dont want to sugarcoat anything because Im not here to lie to you, nor to entertain you with a silly little fifteen year olds story about what happens in her school, home, town.. I just want to tell you about myself.
***
The dreams scared me. I missed him, yes I really did, but I never wrote to him like he asked. He said how could the bitches that screwed him over write to him and his own little sister never could. I wrote to him once. I didnt really know what to say; akward lettering was spread through out the paper about school and WWE wrestling. We loved to watch wrestling.
About the dreams..
I've had some where he is home, the time is 9:45 at night and he is just sitting there a beer in his hand, laughing and talking away. The one that scared me was the one that just cemented into my mind, the one that quickly awoke me from my unpeaceful sleep, the one I wished would never come true.
He was hit by a car. It may sound funny, but no it isnt. He was crippled, Im no dream expert but I hope it doesnt mean that Im going crazy. Crippled, from the neck down, he was just lying there. Yes, I missed my brother, he was sent to jail for something he never did but then kept in jail for other things.
I know some them were for speeding tickets he never paid, those where some of the little things. He never stabbed a guy, he never threatened a police officers son.. I missed him.
***
I quickly got ready for school. My cell phones alarm had went off, thanks to the dream I didnt really need a wake up. I liked my phone. By its self it only cost twenty dollars at the Family Dollar, with the charger it cost thirty and with the mintues it rang to a total of sixty dollars. Better than the phone they gave us. I applied a little makeup to my face, mostly to my eyes and lips. I straightened my hair and ran Biosilk through it. Expensive shit Biosilk, but it worked at least. I grabbed my grey polo and put it on, my uniform. I was thankful we atleast wore pants and not skirts. I squirted some solution into my dry eyes and moved my contacts around.
I stepped out into the hallway and walked into my parents room, they had already made the way into their morning coffee delight. Their bathroom was now the only "fully" functioning one, even before the storm I still used it. I brushed my teeth well enough, the dentists probably suspected that I lie to them now and again about how I keep up with my braces, but then thats just their suspicious minds.
I slipped my feet into my shoes and walked out. It was a short distance between the hallway and kitchen, there now stood a new wall between it. It was needed after the storm. I remembered the terror I felt, the thoughts about if this was my death. The tornado took a good size of the wall that used to be there. No wall, no roof, it was a problem. It had to go sometime I thought afterward. Better a tornado take it than anything possibly worse.
The mobile home we lived in was over twenty-five years old. I had lived there nearly all my life. I couldnt even think about not living there all of a sudden. I still live here now and its not even liveable! We didnt have any immediate money to get a new home. So we resided here. I walked into the kitchen where my father and mother were sipping their fresh coffee and eating cookies. The stove
clock read 7:36, time to go.
"Got your money?" mother asked.
"Nah." We always went through the same routine.
"How much you need?"
I turned to my father who had already pulled out his faded black wallet. It was a present for his birthday, we had bought it at Wal-Mart almost two years ago. I got him a Snoopy card along with it. I dont remember what it said but I know he still has it, along with the bag we put it in. A fish bag. It had a colorful fish on the outside we thought it'd be nice.
"Just two dollars." I put the money into my pocket. I walked outside.
The morning was nice. Cold and bright. My dad fed the nagging animals their cheap food and went to start his truck. "My, woggies." I made baby noises to my dogs and patted their heads as they ran off to join the army of cats in their breakfast. No use smelling like dog when you get to school I thought.
It was a quiet ride to school. The radio did its justice and played some good songs. Just before we arrived into town my dad pulled on his seat belt. It scared me sometimes how he would let go of the wheel totally sometimes just to put it on. I'd rather pay a ticket for not having it on than crashing into another car. I always wore my seat belt. I never used to. I dont know why I started. It wasnt cause of the constant letting go of the wheel. I know that.
***
"Bye, dad". I started down the sidewalk towards the school gym where we waited till 8:00 am.
A dog was sitting at the steps of the entrance, a small black one. Its eyes were black just like its fur and it just stared. I patted his head and walked inside. A teacher said 'Good morning.' as I walked past the coke machines and into the gym. The 7th and 8th grade boys were playing their usual early morning basketball game. I made my way onto the old brown bleachers that had nothing but names and obsenities written on them.
"Hi, Ashley." I sat next to Ashley and Patty the two friends that I mostly talked and hung around with.
"Hey." They both greeted. Something new had been written on the bleachers..
"Dear, 8th graders! Herpes has been brought upon you! They have been brought by Alexis and Debra! Who will be their next victim?...."
I laughed at this. Behind me I noticed Lucero. Now Lucero was the ultimate non caring person I have ever seen. Her skin paler than
that of a vampire her hair worse than that of a mop. She never excerised, covered her face with her hair when out in the day light.
She constantly chewed on the lead parts of a pencil and moaned and complained about being tired when she does nothing.
"Hey, Lucero. Where were you yesterday?." I asked. Ashley and Patty both turned to face her.
"Yeah, it was crazy here without you." Ashley laughed after her words. Lucero's high shrilled voice pierced the air.
"I was getting my Green Card." She answered.
"Why?" I asked nosily.
"Cause, you know since I lived in Mexico..." she waved one of her arms.
"I was born in Mexico." I replied.
"Oh. Oh, I dunno." She said back.
"I didnt live there. It was a vacation and my mom just had me. She said it was a family reunion, everyone was mad cause she like....ruined it." I told her. I heard Ashley laugh faintly. I turned to face the front again.
I watched the boys play, some of them were good. Xavier was good. I liked him. He was tall, very dark. Some people called him Hershey's cause of that. He was nice enough. I watched him jump with the ball towards the basket as he relentlessly hit people on the way up. The ball hit the backboard and bouced on the rim, it slowly fell down into the crowd of pushing boys. No shot.
Alissa and Julie came into the gym carrying Dr.Peppers, Snickers, Hot Fries, beer salt and other assortments of candies. They passed them out to different people. Ashley got Hot Fries and a snickers bar.
"Why'd you get those?" I asked.
"Alissa and em' walk to the store I paid them to get me stuff. Want some?" She offered Hot Fries to me.
"Nah." Julie came hopping off the bleachers. She stood infront of Ashley.
"Ashley." She said calmly.
"Yeah."
"Im pregnant." She said bluntly. My eyes widened. It wasnt my conversation so I didnt look up at her.
"Julie!" Ashley exclaimed. "Are you fucking kidding me?"
"No. I have to move in with Joe Micheal[boyfriend]. I dont want to fucking move in with him. My sister is all fucking pissed and shit saying how come I get to do whatever and all that."
"Julie...no!" Julie stared up at Ashley.
"Nah, Im playin'! I wouldnt do that shit!"
"Oh my God! Dont scare me that way!" Ashley pushed Julie away. Smiling Julie went to the top of the bleachers and sat next to Britny and Alissa.
"Are we going to Victor's to work on the project today?" Ashley asked.
"I dunno, I dont want to though! I dont want to see his face everyday after school anymore!" I laughed. The bell rang. Yay! School had begun.
***
First was math the time when we students wonder if the teacher is a lesbian, then the ever so 'I want to kill myself before I go to Mrs. Escobar's class' Language, then Science slighty better alot better, lunch! glorious lunch the time you wait for all morning, then Health boring and slow but Little Micheal always has his Ipod so that makes it better, Athletics like lunch except no food now you may say "Hey dont you excercise?"
No, not really, then.. Mrs. Teague's class History the last class of the day. The one you could cry in because the clock is ticking backwards, the class where no one listens, there's yelling and no one gets their work done. I hate that class. Yes, a passion burns inside me and its called hate and I feel it for that class.
As I walked down the school hallway I kept up with Ashley and Patty. I got to my locker and slowly opened it. A binder fell out. The Green one, history binder. I shoved it back in. Blue binder was at the bottom as always, stupid math binder. I grabbed it and a pencil that laid on top on of my Language book. I walked into the math class and threw the binder on the desk and walked back into the hallway. I went down to Ashley's locker.
"Hey."
"Sup, Mall?" she said as she searched through her purse.
"Look." She pulled out what looked like a perfume botte.
"Wow. Perfume." I said as put her purse under her arm.
"No. Its Jack Daniels. You just spray it in your mouth or break the top off." She sprayed some into her mouth.
"Want?" She asked.
"Why not?" I said as she sprayed some into my mouth.
"Im gonna need more of that for Mrs. Escobar's." I laughed and walked back to math.
She was buff for a woman, she wore mens clothing, she had short blonde/brown /black/white hair that reached to the bottom of her ears. She had a southern accent I guess she had some kind of accent. Like farmers, that live in the country and chew tabacco. Kinda like that kind of talk. Her name Jane Ashley White. Or just Miss White OR Coach White. Math was boring I used to fall asleep during that class, I lost that habit. I regret it.
The hour and forty five minutes passed thank god. We had said the Pledge sort of, we just stood there hands over our hearts barely and, ate the shit breakfast. Required by the state my ass! More like whatever we can afford for five dollars. We argued over uniforms with our teacher. "Why cant we just where whatever? Its not like we dress like what you people say! We dont dress like Ho's! We dont make fun each others clothes!" Stuff like that.
FAST FORWARD!
I sat in my seat. It was burning up. Mrs. Escobar's class was always hot. And Mr. Big Shit just walked in. "Fuck! Its fucking hot in here! Man, I hate this class
they wont fix the A.C on purpose. Fuck It! Its prolly not even broken the bitch just wants to make us mad!" Coleton complained.
"Its 82 degrees in here." I poked in.
"What? Oh my God!. Im gonna die."
We had been reading The Outsiders for a year now. Haha, and we're just now trying to finish. Most people finish on their own, now they wanna see the movie.
I liked the book but parts made me laugh even though they were'nt funny. I remember something Ponyboy said about Johnny, he was describing Johnny
for his story. "A dark, handsome, hot tempered young boy." Something like that I dont remember cause Coleton yelled out "Is Ponyboy gay! Seriously
I think this guy is a faggot! HE WAS HANDSOME! WHOOO!" Mrs. Escobar hadnt noticed what he said, she was talking to the other kids.
I dont think she'd care about gay people, since she was an UBER Christian. Im Christian but I dont get all hot and bothered about Harry Potter movies or Lord of The Rings movies and call them evil and then wear The Chronicals of Narnia shirts. I dont wanna stereotype.She just comes off that way. Her class lasted an hour and thirty minutes. Thats about an hour and thirty minutes waaay to long. She lectured us about how kids do drugs and all these bad things. She told us how monkeys get tested with cocaine and how they die slow horrible painful deaths. We dont care about cocaine! But if the monkeys smoked pot.. No one did coke.
Science came. Our science teacher was one of the better ones. He was nice, he was funny but never really laughed. He hated when girls put on make up
around him. He claimed it "grossed him out". We always took notes. Long, stupid, athritis causing notes! Some how we went from talking about the Ocean to
SpongeBob and how impossible it is to make Krabby Patties underwater.
"Im just saying how can they make Krabby Patties if its a stove? They cant and how can a pineapple stay fresh underwater that long?" Marlene asked Mr. Longoria.
"Marlene, did you eat any mushrooms on your way to school? Mushrooms...little magic mushrooms?" We all laughed. Mr. Longoria went to turn on the lights, finally no more notes.
"Is everyone done writing?" Marlene asked.
"No." A few people said.
"Move the page down a little bit." Some asked. Travis got up from his seat to move the page on the over head.
"I'll do it." Marlene said.
"No."
"Travis, get away."
Travis grabbed the paper and ran. Some people yelled at him.
"Give me the paper Travis!" Travis laughed a bit revealing his very crooked teeth.
"Give!" Marlene yelled.
"No. Get back or I'll hit you!" Travis said and laughed while backing away from Marlene.
"Go a-fucking-head you fucking white boy prolly wont hurt anyway!" Marlene
grabbed the paper out of Travis' hand. We got back to our writing and waited for lunch. I was getting hungry...
But if it were a movie...I think people would say it ripped off another movie. Ha.
Despite my lack of expierce in writing, I thought it was nessecary to write down
what happens around me. Important or not. I often get bored and find myself mindlessly staring at my surroundings thinking can this.. wasteland become anything more than a complete and utter shithole? I dont want to sugarcoat anything because Im not here to lie to you, nor to entertain you with a silly little fifteen year olds story about what happens in her school, home, town.. I just want to tell you about myself.
***
The dreams scared me. I missed him, yes I really did, but I never wrote to him like he asked. He said how could the bitches that screwed him over write to him and his own little sister never could. I wrote to him once. I didnt really know what to say; akward lettering was spread through out the paper about school and WWE wrestling. We loved to watch wrestling.
About the dreams..
I've had some where he is home, the time is 9:45 at night and he is just sitting there a beer in his hand, laughing and talking away. The one that scared me was the one that just cemented into my mind, the one that quickly awoke me from my unpeaceful sleep, the one I wished would never come true.
He was hit by a car. It may sound funny, but no it isnt. He was crippled, Im no dream expert but I hope it doesnt mean that Im going crazy. Crippled, from the neck down, he was just lying there. Yes, I missed my brother, he was sent to jail for something he never did but then kept in jail for other things.
I know some them were for speeding tickets he never paid, those where some of the little things. He never stabbed a guy, he never threatened a police officers son.. I missed him.
***
I quickly got ready for school. My cell phones alarm had went off, thanks to the dream I didnt really need a wake up. I liked my phone. By its self it only cost twenty dollars at the Family Dollar, with the charger it cost thirty and with the mintues it rang to a total of sixty dollars. Better than the phone they gave us. I applied a little makeup to my face, mostly to my eyes and lips. I straightened my hair and ran Biosilk through it. Expensive shit Biosilk, but it worked at least. I grabbed my grey polo and put it on, my uniform. I was thankful we atleast wore pants and not skirts. I squirted some solution into my dry eyes and moved my contacts around.
I stepped out into the hallway and walked into my parents room, they had already made the way into their morning coffee delight. Their bathroom was now the only "fully" functioning one, even before the storm I still used it. I brushed my teeth well enough, the dentists probably suspected that I lie to them now and again about how I keep up with my braces, but then thats just their suspicious minds.
I slipped my feet into my shoes and walked out. It was a short distance between the hallway and kitchen, there now stood a new wall between it. It was needed after the storm. I remembered the terror I felt, the thoughts about if this was my death. The tornado took a good size of the wall that used to be there. No wall, no roof, it was a problem. It had to go sometime I thought afterward. Better a tornado take it than anything possibly worse.
The mobile home we lived in was over twenty-five years old. I had lived there nearly all my life. I couldnt even think about not living there all of a sudden. I still live here now and its not even liveable! We didnt have any immediate money to get a new home. So we resided here. I walked into the kitchen where my father and mother were sipping their fresh coffee and eating cookies. The stove
clock read 7:36, time to go.
"Got your money?" mother asked.
"Nah." We always went through the same routine.
"How much you need?"
I turned to my father who had already pulled out his faded black wallet. It was a present for his birthday, we had bought it at Wal-Mart almost two years ago. I got him a Snoopy card along with it. I dont remember what it said but I know he still has it, along with the bag we put it in. A fish bag. It had a colorful fish on the outside we thought it'd be nice.
"Just two dollars." I put the money into my pocket. I walked outside.
The morning was nice. Cold and bright. My dad fed the nagging animals their cheap food and went to start his truck. "My, woggies." I made baby noises to my dogs and patted their heads as they ran off to join the army of cats in their breakfast. No use smelling like dog when you get to school I thought.
It was a quiet ride to school. The radio did its justice and played some good songs. Just before we arrived into town my dad pulled on his seat belt. It scared me sometimes how he would let go of the wheel totally sometimes just to put it on. I'd rather pay a ticket for not having it on than crashing into another car. I always wore my seat belt. I never used to. I dont know why I started. It wasnt cause of the constant letting go of the wheel. I know that.
***
"Bye, dad". I started down the sidewalk towards the school gym where we waited till 8:00 am.
A dog was sitting at the steps of the entrance, a small black one. Its eyes were black just like its fur and it just stared. I patted his head and walked inside. A teacher said 'Good morning.' as I walked past the coke machines and into the gym. The 7th and 8th grade boys were playing their usual early morning basketball game. I made my way onto the old brown bleachers that had nothing but names and obsenities written on them.
"Hi, Ashley." I sat next to Ashley and Patty the two friends that I mostly talked and hung around with.
"Hey." They both greeted. Something new had been written on the bleachers..
"Dear, 8th graders! Herpes has been brought upon you! They have been brought by Alexis and Debra! Who will be their next victim?...."
I laughed at this. Behind me I noticed Lucero. Now Lucero was the ultimate non caring person I have ever seen. Her skin paler than
that of a vampire her hair worse than that of a mop. She never excerised, covered her face with her hair when out in the day light.
She constantly chewed on the lead parts of a pencil and moaned and complained about being tired when she does nothing.
"Hey, Lucero. Where were you yesterday?." I asked. Ashley and Patty both turned to face her.
"Yeah, it was crazy here without you." Ashley laughed after her words. Lucero's high shrilled voice pierced the air.
"I was getting my Green Card." She answered.
"Why?" I asked nosily.
"Cause, you know since I lived in Mexico..." she waved one of her arms.
"I was born in Mexico." I replied.
"Oh. Oh, I dunno." She said back.
"I didnt live there. It was a vacation and my mom just had me. She said it was a family reunion, everyone was mad cause she like....ruined it." I told her. I heard Ashley laugh faintly. I turned to face the front again.
I watched the boys play, some of them were good. Xavier was good. I liked him. He was tall, very dark. Some people called him Hershey's cause of that. He was nice enough. I watched him jump with the ball towards the basket as he relentlessly hit people on the way up. The ball hit the backboard and bouced on the rim, it slowly fell down into the crowd of pushing boys. No shot.
Alissa and Julie came into the gym carrying Dr.Peppers, Snickers, Hot Fries, beer salt and other assortments of candies. They passed them out to different people. Ashley got Hot Fries and a snickers bar.
"Why'd you get those?" I asked.
"Alissa and em' walk to the store I paid them to get me stuff. Want some?" She offered Hot Fries to me.
"Nah." Julie came hopping off the bleachers. She stood infront of Ashley.
"Ashley." She said calmly.
"Yeah."
"Im pregnant." She said bluntly. My eyes widened. It wasnt my conversation so I didnt look up at her.
"Julie!" Ashley exclaimed. "Are you fucking kidding me?"
"No. I have to move in with Joe Micheal[boyfriend]. I dont want to fucking move in with him. My sister is all fucking pissed and shit saying how come I get to do whatever and all that."
"Julie...no!" Julie stared up at Ashley.
"Nah, Im playin'! I wouldnt do that shit!"
"Oh my God! Dont scare me that way!" Ashley pushed Julie away. Smiling Julie went to the top of the bleachers and sat next to Britny and Alissa.
"Are we going to Victor's to work on the project today?" Ashley asked.
"I dunno, I dont want to though! I dont want to see his face everyday after school anymore!" I laughed. The bell rang. Yay! School had begun.
***
First was math the time when we students wonder if the teacher is a lesbian, then the ever so 'I want to kill myself before I go to Mrs. Escobar's class' Language, then Science slighty better alot better, lunch! glorious lunch the time you wait for all morning, then Health boring and slow but Little Micheal always has his Ipod so that makes it better, Athletics like lunch except no food now you may say "Hey dont you excercise?"
No, not really, then.. Mrs. Teague's class History the last class of the day. The one you could cry in because the clock is ticking backwards, the class where no one listens, there's yelling and no one gets their work done. I hate that class. Yes, a passion burns inside me and its called hate and I feel it for that class.
As I walked down the school hallway I kept up with Ashley and Patty. I got to my locker and slowly opened it. A binder fell out. The Green one, history binder. I shoved it back in. Blue binder was at the bottom as always, stupid math binder. I grabbed it and a pencil that laid on top on of my Language book. I walked into the math class and threw the binder on the desk and walked back into the hallway. I went down to Ashley's locker.
"Hey."
"Sup, Mall?" she said as she searched through her purse.
"Look." She pulled out what looked like a perfume botte.
"Wow. Perfume." I said as put her purse under her arm.
"No. Its Jack Daniels. You just spray it in your mouth or break the top off." She sprayed some into her mouth.
"Want?" She asked.
"Why not?" I said as she sprayed some into my mouth.
"Im gonna need more of that for Mrs. Escobar's." I laughed and walked back to math.
She was buff for a woman, she wore mens clothing, she had short blonde/brown /black/white hair that reached to the bottom of her ears. She had a southern accent I guess she had some kind of accent. Like farmers, that live in the country and chew tabacco. Kinda like that kind of talk. Her name Jane Ashley White. Or just Miss White OR Coach White. Math was boring I used to fall asleep during that class, I lost that habit. I regret it.
The hour and forty five minutes passed thank god. We had said the Pledge sort of, we just stood there hands over our hearts barely and, ate the shit breakfast. Required by the state my ass! More like whatever we can afford for five dollars. We argued over uniforms with our teacher. "Why cant we just where whatever? Its not like we dress like what you people say! We dont dress like Ho's! We dont make fun each others clothes!" Stuff like that.
FAST FORWARD!
I sat in my seat. It was burning up. Mrs. Escobar's class was always hot. And Mr. Big Shit just walked in. "Fuck! Its fucking hot in here! Man, I hate this class
they wont fix the A.C on purpose. Fuck It! Its prolly not even broken the bitch just wants to make us mad!" Coleton complained.
"Its 82 degrees in here." I poked in.
"What? Oh my God!. Im gonna die."
We had been reading The Outsiders for a year now. Haha, and we're just now trying to finish. Most people finish on their own, now they wanna see the movie.
I liked the book but parts made me laugh even though they were'nt funny. I remember something Ponyboy said about Johnny, he was describing Johnny
for his story. "A dark, handsome, hot tempered young boy." Something like that I dont remember cause Coleton yelled out "Is Ponyboy gay! Seriously
I think this guy is a faggot! HE WAS HANDSOME! WHOOO!" Mrs. Escobar hadnt noticed what he said, she was talking to the other kids.
I dont think she'd care about gay people, since she was an UBER Christian. Im Christian but I dont get all hot and bothered about Harry Potter movies or Lord of The Rings movies and call them evil and then wear The Chronicals of Narnia shirts. I dont wanna stereotype.She just comes off that way. Her class lasted an hour and thirty minutes. Thats about an hour and thirty minutes waaay to long. She lectured us about how kids do drugs and all these bad things. She told us how monkeys get tested with cocaine and how they die slow horrible painful deaths. We dont care about cocaine! But if the monkeys smoked pot.. No one did coke.
Science came. Our science teacher was one of the better ones. He was nice, he was funny but never really laughed. He hated when girls put on make up
around him. He claimed it "grossed him out". We always took notes. Long, stupid, athritis causing notes! Some how we went from talking about the Ocean to
SpongeBob and how impossible it is to make Krabby Patties underwater.
"Im just saying how can they make Krabby Patties if its a stove? They cant and how can a pineapple stay fresh underwater that long?" Marlene asked Mr. Longoria.
"Marlene, did you eat any mushrooms on your way to school? Mushrooms...little magic mushrooms?" We all laughed. Mr. Longoria went to turn on the lights, finally no more notes.
"Is everyone done writing?" Marlene asked.
"No." A few people said.
"Move the page down a little bit." Some asked. Travis got up from his seat to move the page on the over head.
"I'll do it." Marlene said.
"No."
"Travis, get away."
Travis grabbed the paper and ran. Some people yelled at him.
"Give me the paper Travis!" Travis laughed a bit revealing his very crooked teeth.
"Give!" Marlene yelled.
"No. Get back or I'll hit you!" Travis said and laughed while backing away from Marlene.
"Go a-fucking-head you fucking white boy prolly wont hurt anyway!" Marlene
grabbed the paper out of Travis' hand. We got back to our writing and waited for lunch. I was getting hungry...
