Memories Of Her, chapter 7
"Dad, can we go get a movie from Blockbuster?" Jakob asked me. Almost a week had passed; it was the first Friday of May and the smell of spring was in the air. I turned from my laptop to see Jakob standing in the doorway of the living room. I closed the laptop and stood up from the couch.
"Sure, you know what you want or is this going to be like last time?" I asked him. He shrugged and grinned a little.
"I knew what I wanted last time, but it was completely out," he reasoned. I shook my head with a smile on my face. "What? It was out of stock," he defended himself.
"I know, I know. It's just that it took you like an hour to pick out another movie. I don't want to be stuck in Blockbuster for an hour," I said with a short laugh. He rolled his eyes at me.
"I didn't take an hour, it was more like forty-five minutes," he argued. I decided to leave it at that and let him win.
"Okay whatever, are you ready to go?" I asked. He nodded and headed out of the house to the car. Before following him out I called up the stairs to see if Joey wanted to join us. "Hey Joe?" I yelled to him.
"What?" I heard him call back. I asked him if he wanted to go and he said no like usual. Joey didn't enjoy leaving the house like he used to do; the only reasons he did leave the house were to go to school and to go to work in the mornings to deliver newspapers. I was worried about him; when Adie was alive he was practically never home, he was always at a friends house or just running around acting like a kid. It wasn't healthy the way he was shutting himself up in the house these days. He didn't even like to come out of his room which made me even more anxious.
For now, I decided to let Joey be by himself and went out into the warm night. When I walked to the car I saw lighting bugs and I could hear the sound of crickets and frogs. I peered through the windshield to see Jakob patiently waiting for me.
"So, what movie do you want buddy?" I asked once I had backed out of the driveway and was driving down our street.
"Um..Madagascar," he said hesitantly. I smiled and gave him a quick glance before returning my eyes to the road.
"We've seen that movie so many times," I moan. He smiles slightly and bits his lower lip.
"I know, it's just, it's the last movie we watched with mom," he replied. I looked over at him, he was looking out his window trying to keep his glistening eyes from watering. I could see a tear slowly creep down his creek only to be quickly wiped away. "It isn't fair," he whispered.
At this point my own eyes had begun to fight back tears and my vision was becoming slightly blurred. I pulled off the road and into the parking lot of Molly's Corner Convenience Store. "Jakob, I know it isn't fair that mom's gone. I know you miss her terribly, but she wouldn't want us to get upset every time we thought or talked about her. She would want us to think of her in happiness, not sadness," I said avoiding eye contact with him. What I was telling my son was easier said then done; I myself broke down into tears at the mere memory of Adrienne. I could feel his eyes watching me.
"You cry a lot over mom too," he said. I turned towards him just as my tears broke loose and ran down my cheeks. I wiped them away and tried to smile for the seven year old boy who, within a matter of seconds, went from looking sorrowful to frightened. I had never cried in front of Jakob like this, it was quite new for him.
He unbuckled his seat belt and leaned over to me and embraced me with a hug of comfort. I smiled at his loving actions, but more tears slipped away from my anguished green eyes.
It was a quiet night and the only noise that could be heard in our house was the lulling sound of Adie's soft humming. She was in Jakob's room trying to sing him to sleep; she had finally got him to stop crying. He was only a few days old and we had just brought him home from the hospital yesterday morning to Joey's dismay. Joey was not exactly pleased to learn that he would have to share our attention with another sibling.
I peeked into the room that had been freshly painted a soft yellow and decorated with numerous baby accessories. There she was sitting in the white wooden rocker holding a small bundle of blankets. I stepped into the room and advanced towards my wife close enough to see a tiny pink face within the blankets.
"Hey," I whispered to her. She looked up from Jakob with a weary expression on her face. She had been up very late with him and I knew I should offer to take a turn with him. She needed her rest, especially if she was going to be the one who was mainly going to be watching two kids.
I offered to take her place for the rest of the night, she stood up with Jakob still in her arms; she gestured for me to sit down in the rocker. I sat down in the sturdy seat and was pleasantly surprised when she sat in my lap with our small, young son still secure in her arms. She rested her head on my shoulder and relaxed. I kissed her cheek and gently stroked Jakob's cheek with my finger. The rest of the night was peaceful and morning came too quickly, when I awoke Adie was awake and looking down at the sleeping baby. Her brown eyes slowly looked up and she gazed into my eyes.
"Good morning," she whispered. I leaned into her and kissed her lips softly before whispering good morning to her. It was mornings like this that I lived for; these were the types of mornings that I actually could admit I loved.
Jakob and I never made it to Blockbuster, instead we came home and sat in the living room looking through old family photographs of Adie. Unexpectedly, Joey came out of his room and joined us. The night was full of treasured memories and countless tears.
"Sure, you know what you want or is this going to be like last time?" I asked him. He shrugged and grinned a little.
"I knew what I wanted last time, but it was completely out," he reasoned. I shook my head with a smile on my face. "What? It was out of stock," he defended himself.
"I know, I know. It's just that it took you like an hour to pick out another movie. I don't want to be stuck in Blockbuster for an hour," I said with a short laugh. He rolled his eyes at me.
"I didn't take an hour, it was more like forty-five minutes," he argued. I decided to leave it at that and let him win.
"Okay whatever, are you ready to go?" I asked. He nodded and headed out of the house to the car. Before following him out I called up the stairs to see if Joey wanted to join us. "Hey Joe?" I yelled to him.
"What?" I heard him call back. I asked him if he wanted to go and he said no like usual. Joey didn't enjoy leaving the house like he used to do; the only reasons he did leave the house were to go to school and to go to work in the mornings to deliver newspapers. I was worried about him; when Adie was alive he was practically never home, he was always at a friends house or just running around acting like a kid. It wasn't healthy the way he was shutting himself up in the house these days. He didn't even like to come out of his room which made me even more anxious.
For now, I decided to let Joey be by himself and went out into the warm night. When I walked to the car I saw lighting bugs and I could hear the sound of crickets and frogs. I peered through the windshield to see Jakob patiently waiting for me.
"So, what movie do you want buddy?" I asked once I had backed out of the driveway and was driving down our street.
"Um..Madagascar," he said hesitantly. I smiled and gave him a quick glance before returning my eyes to the road.
"We've seen that movie so many times," I moan. He smiles slightly and bits his lower lip.
"I know, it's just, it's the last movie we watched with mom," he replied. I looked over at him, he was looking out his window trying to keep his glistening eyes from watering. I could see a tear slowly creep down his creek only to be quickly wiped away. "It isn't fair," he whispered.
At this point my own eyes had begun to fight back tears and my vision was becoming slightly blurred. I pulled off the road and into the parking lot of Molly's Corner Convenience Store. "Jakob, I know it isn't fair that mom's gone. I know you miss her terribly, but she wouldn't want us to get upset every time we thought or talked about her. She would want us to think of her in happiness, not sadness," I said avoiding eye contact with him. What I was telling my son was easier said then done; I myself broke down into tears at the mere memory of Adrienne. I could feel his eyes watching me.
"You cry a lot over mom too," he said. I turned towards him just as my tears broke loose and ran down my cheeks. I wiped them away and tried to smile for the seven year old boy who, within a matter of seconds, went from looking sorrowful to frightened. I had never cried in front of Jakob like this, it was quite new for him.
He unbuckled his seat belt and leaned over to me and embraced me with a hug of comfort. I smiled at his loving actions, but more tears slipped away from my anguished green eyes.
It was a quiet night and the only noise that could be heard in our house was the lulling sound of Adie's soft humming. She was in Jakob's room trying to sing him to sleep; she had finally got him to stop crying. He was only a few days old and we had just brought him home from the hospital yesterday morning to Joey's dismay. Joey was not exactly pleased to learn that he would have to share our attention with another sibling.
I peeked into the room that had been freshly painted a soft yellow and decorated with numerous baby accessories. There she was sitting in the white wooden rocker holding a small bundle of blankets. I stepped into the room and advanced towards my wife close enough to see a tiny pink face within the blankets.
"Hey," I whispered to her. She looked up from Jakob with a weary expression on her face. She had been up very late with him and I knew I should offer to take a turn with him. She needed her rest, especially if she was going to be the one who was mainly going to be watching two kids.
I offered to take her place for the rest of the night, she stood up with Jakob still in her arms; she gestured for me to sit down in the rocker. I sat down in the sturdy seat and was pleasantly surprised when she sat in my lap with our small, young son still secure in her arms. She rested her head on my shoulder and relaxed. I kissed her cheek and gently stroked Jakob's cheek with my finger. The rest of the night was peaceful and morning came too quickly, when I awoke Adie was awake and looking down at the sleeping baby. Her brown eyes slowly looked up and she gazed into my eyes.
"Good morning," she whispered. I leaned into her and kissed her lips softly before whispering good morning to her. It was mornings like this that I lived for; these were the types of mornings that I actually could admit I loved.
Jakob and I never made it to Blockbuster, instead we came home and sat in the living room looking through old family photographs of Adie. Unexpectedly, Joey came out of his room and joined us. The night was full of treasured memories and countless tears.
