Saying Goodbye., chapter 6
I had met up with the guys at Mike's. Adrienne had to calm me down before I came because I kept breaking down.
"So whats up Beej?" asked Tre, obviously thinking that I had come up with an idea for the band.
"Um.." I started
"Come on spit it out Bill!" Mike said, thinking the same as Tre.
"I have to tell you something important" I said, my voice shaking as I said it.
"What's shaking Billie Joe? Is it an idea for Green Day?" Tre asked
"No..." I started
"Um yes it's an idea for Green Day, I gotta go, I'll explain to you tomorrow, bye!" I said running out of Mike's into the warm California air.
"Fucking idiot Billie Joe" I said to myself.
I hopped into my SUV and drove down towards the bay. It was nearing sunset, I hadn't watched the sunset at the bay since I was a teenager, I was as high as a kite but it didn't matter, it looked beautiful any time.
I sat down on the rocks, the gentle waves washing around them. I picked up a rock and threw it into the water. I watched it skip across the water and picked up another.
I was there for a couple hours after sun down, watching the stars, trying to spot constellations. I only snapped out of my trance when my phone rang. I looked at the screen. Home
"Hey Adie, I'm just on my way home, I'll tell you when I get there, love you, bye" I said, putting the phone back in my pocket.
***
I stepped inside and pulled my shoes off and put them on the shoe rack.
"Adie?" I called
"We're in here" she called, from the back room.
I walked in and Adie and Joey were doing his homework and Jakob must have been in bed.
"How did it go?" she asked
"I didn't tell them" I said with a sigh, flopping down on the armchair.
"Oh Billie, why not?"
I blew a piece of hair off my face, "I bottled out, they were both excited that it was something for the band and I just said it was and left, I've been down by the bay, skimming rocks" I answered.
"Well they're coming over tomorrow anyway, you have to tell them Billie." she said
"I know, you go on out, I'll finish up here with Joe" I replied
"Okay" she said kissing my cheek lightly.
"Right what are we doing here?" I asked
"Long division" Joey replied.
"What? You just said a whole bunch of stuff I didn't understand" I replied, Joey giggled.
"It's okay dad, I only have two more to do, you just watch and learn" He told me
"Okie dokie" I said.
***
The next day, I got up quite late, I went to the bathroom and washed my face. Adie walked in and laughed as I shook my head like a dog.
"The guys will be here in 10" she said, putting some towels away.
" 'Kay" I said, pulling on some baige 3 quater lengths and my black and purple stripey t-shirt.
I sat downstairs, tapping my finger on the arm of the couch. The doorbell rang and Adrienne answered. Joey was sitting beside me and Jakob was on the floor playing with a toy car.
"Yo Beej" Said Mike, giving him a high five.
" 'Sup dude?" asked Tre
"Not much" I replied, shakily again.
"Go on Billie Joe, tell them" Adrienne urged.
"Um about yesterday" I started
"Yeah, you were a bit vacant yesterday, like away with the faries, were you high?" asked Tre
"No I wasn't. What I told you wasn't actually the truth, what I wanted to tell you was that, that" My breath got hitched in my throat.
"I want to tell you that" tears started streaming down my face
"Bill?" asked Mike.
"Dad wants to tell you that he has lung cancer and only has four months" Joey said bravely as he leaned over and wiped my tears away. I hugged him tightly as he also let a few tears escape.
"Thanks buddy" I said giving him a kiss.
"Four months?" Tre asked in disbelief, I nodded.
I looked over at Mike and couldn't bear it any longer, he was sitting staring into space, a tear sliding down his cheek. I got up and ran to my bedroom, it was all too much for me.
I was there for several minutes when the door creaked open and a small figure lay beside me.
"I had to help you dad, I knew you couldn't do it by yourself" Joey whispered softly.
The truth was, I couldn't do it by myself
"So whats up Beej?" asked Tre, obviously thinking that I had come up with an idea for the band.
"Um.." I started
"Come on spit it out Bill!" Mike said, thinking the same as Tre.
"I have to tell you something important" I said, my voice shaking as I said it.
"What's shaking Billie Joe? Is it an idea for Green Day?" Tre asked
"No..." I started
"Um yes it's an idea for Green Day, I gotta go, I'll explain to you tomorrow, bye!" I said running out of Mike's into the warm California air.
"Fucking idiot Billie Joe" I said to myself.
I hopped into my SUV and drove down towards the bay. It was nearing sunset, I hadn't watched the sunset at the bay since I was a teenager, I was as high as a kite but it didn't matter, it looked beautiful any time.
I sat down on the rocks, the gentle waves washing around them. I picked up a rock and threw it into the water. I watched it skip across the water and picked up another.
I was there for a couple hours after sun down, watching the stars, trying to spot constellations. I only snapped out of my trance when my phone rang. I looked at the screen. Home
"Hey Adie, I'm just on my way home, I'll tell you when I get there, love you, bye" I said, putting the phone back in my pocket.
***
I stepped inside and pulled my shoes off and put them on the shoe rack.
"Adie?" I called
"We're in here" she called, from the back room.
I walked in and Adie and Joey were doing his homework and Jakob must have been in bed.
"How did it go?" she asked
"I didn't tell them" I said with a sigh, flopping down on the armchair.
"Oh Billie, why not?"
I blew a piece of hair off my face, "I bottled out, they were both excited that it was something for the band and I just said it was and left, I've been down by the bay, skimming rocks" I answered.
"Well they're coming over tomorrow anyway, you have to tell them Billie." she said
"I know, you go on out, I'll finish up here with Joe" I replied
"Okay" she said kissing my cheek lightly.
"Right what are we doing here?" I asked
"Long division" Joey replied.
"What? You just said a whole bunch of stuff I didn't understand" I replied, Joey giggled.
"It's okay dad, I only have two more to do, you just watch and learn" He told me
"Okie dokie" I said.
***
The next day, I got up quite late, I went to the bathroom and washed my face. Adie walked in and laughed as I shook my head like a dog.
"The guys will be here in 10" she said, putting some towels away.
" 'Kay" I said, pulling on some baige 3 quater lengths and my black and purple stripey t-shirt.
I sat downstairs, tapping my finger on the arm of the couch. The doorbell rang and Adrienne answered. Joey was sitting beside me and Jakob was on the floor playing with a toy car.
"Yo Beej" Said Mike, giving him a high five.
" 'Sup dude?" asked Tre
"Not much" I replied, shakily again.
"Go on Billie Joe, tell them" Adrienne urged.
"Um about yesterday" I started
"Yeah, you were a bit vacant yesterday, like away with the faries, were you high?" asked Tre
"No I wasn't. What I told you wasn't actually the truth, what I wanted to tell you was that, that" My breath got hitched in my throat.
"I want to tell you that" tears started streaming down my face
"Bill?" asked Mike.
"Dad wants to tell you that he has lung cancer and only has four months" Joey said bravely as he leaned over and wiped my tears away. I hugged him tightly as he also let a few tears escape.
"Thanks buddy" I said giving him a kiss.
"Four months?" Tre asked in disbelief, I nodded.
I looked over at Mike and couldn't bear it any longer, he was sitting staring into space, a tear sliding down his cheek. I got up and ran to my bedroom, it was all too much for me.
I was there for several minutes when the door creaked open and a small figure lay beside me.
"I had to help you dad, I knew you couldn't do it by yourself" Joey whispered softly.
The truth was, I couldn't do it by myself
