What Becomes of a Tragedy?, chapter 5
"What are you talking about? How could you say that?" Tre was the most scared I have ever seen him. "You don't mean that. Tell me why you would say that!!"
"Tre, I have been thinking about this for a few weeks now. And with this new record and the tour you guys have planned. I don't want to be a distraction or a burden. I don't want you to feel like you need to give all your attention to me - I don't want you to feel like you're neglecting me." By now, I'm almost in tears. "I want you to give all of your attention to this record and this tour."
Tre is also almost in tears. "But you're crying, you don't mean that. You don't want this to happen anymore than I do. Don't do this. You can't ruin the best thing going for us right now."
"But, Tre, I'm not the best thing going for you right now. I have heard some of the cuts you guys have done. This record is going to take you three to a world you could have only dreamed of. This tour is going to take you to places of the world you've only seen in pictures."
"Holly, I want you to be a part of that. I want you to share all those things with me. I live my life everyday knowing that you're here next to me to share everything. I can't do this without you."
"But you can. I know you can. And don't talk like I'm not going to be here. I'll still be here. I'll always be here. I just don't think I can handle knowing that you are on the other side of the world without me." Tre shot me a look I know I've seen before (a long time ago) "And it's not that I don't trust you - I know what that look means." He shot me another look that I know all too well. "And it's not that I don't trust myself or our relationship. I don't trust other people. I want you to go on with this record and tour. I want you to know that everything will be fine. I want you to know that I will still be here, for you, for Mike, for Billie, for Adie. For all of you. It's not like I am disappearing off the face of the earth. I am just removing a title from our relationship. For both of our sakes."
"But I don't want that title to be removed. I don't want to be single. I want to be with you. Why can't you see that? Why can't you see that I would do anything for you? Why can't you see that I can't live without you next to me?"
"Tre, this is how it is going to be. I know this hurts. It hurts me too."
"Then, don't do this. If it hurts - DON"T DO THIS!!"
"I have to. It is what I have to do. For my heart. Things are going to change in your life - real quick and I don't think I can handle them."
"And you think I'm going to be able to? Since when have I been able to handle anything on my own?"
"Then, I guess this is our chance for each of us to do things on our own for a while." We are both very emotional, but I still had more news. "Tre, I am going back to school."
"For what? You have a great job. What do you need to go back to school for?"
"I'm going to get a degree that has to do with where I work."
"You work at a lumber yard. What do you need a degree in construction for?"
"Because I have been offered a manager position and if I get this degree in a year, which is all it's going to take to get it. I can have the store manager position. This is a great opportunity for me. I can't pass it up."
"Did this have any effect on your decision?"
"Yes, because I know you. And if we were together, I knew you'd want me to come and see you every chance I got. And when this came up a work, I couldn't pass this up. They are going to pay for the tuition and everything I need for the schooling."
Tre smiled - weakly - but it was still a smile and stands up. "Well, I hope everything works out. Can you promise me one thing?"
"What am I promising?"
"That you will still be my best friend and I can still come to you for anything."
"Tre, I told you I am not going anywhere. I am still going to be here. I promise you that I will always be here for you, no matter what. I promise I will still be your best friend and I promise you can still come to me for anything." We both smile because we knew I meant it.
"I am going to go home, now. Just don't forget..."
"Don't forget what?"
"How much I love you." With that Tre kisses me on the cheek and leaves my house. I sit there in silence and touch my cheek where he had just laid his lips.
"I love you, too..."
A few months flew by. Tre and I still stayed best friends, like we promised. But Tre had started dating somebody else. (Yeah, it hurt, but it was my choice to end what we had, so I had to live with him dating other girls.) The guys released 'Dookie' - their best record so far. And right before Billie and Adie got married, Tre found me. He looked almost as scared as he did that night.
"Holly, I need to tell you something..."
"Tre, I have been thinking about this for a few weeks now. And with this new record and the tour you guys have planned. I don't want to be a distraction or a burden. I don't want you to feel like you need to give all your attention to me - I don't want you to feel like you're neglecting me." By now, I'm almost in tears. "I want you to give all of your attention to this record and this tour."
Tre is also almost in tears. "But you're crying, you don't mean that. You don't want this to happen anymore than I do. Don't do this. You can't ruin the best thing going for us right now."
"But, Tre, I'm not the best thing going for you right now. I have heard some of the cuts you guys have done. This record is going to take you three to a world you could have only dreamed of. This tour is going to take you to places of the world you've only seen in pictures."
"Holly, I want you to be a part of that. I want you to share all those things with me. I live my life everyday knowing that you're here next to me to share everything. I can't do this without you."
"But you can. I know you can. And don't talk like I'm not going to be here. I'll still be here. I'll always be here. I just don't think I can handle knowing that you are on the other side of the world without me." Tre shot me a look I know I've seen before (a long time ago) "And it's not that I don't trust you - I know what that look means." He shot me another look that I know all too well. "And it's not that I don't trust myself or our relationship. I don't trust other people. I want you to go on with this record and tour. I want you to know that everything will be fine. I want you to know that I will still be here, for you, for Mike, for Billie, for Adie. For all of you. It's not like I am disappearing off the face of the earth. I am just removing a title from our relationship. For both of our sakes."
"But I don't want that title to be removed. I don't want to be single. I want to be with you. Why can't you see that? Why can't you see that I would do anything for you? Why can't you see that I can't live without you next to me?"
"Tre, this is how it is going to be. I know this hurts. It hurts me too."
"Then, don't do this. If it hurts - DON"T DO THIS!!"
"I have to. It is what I have to do. For my heart. Things are going to change in your life - real quick and I don't think I can handle them."
"And you think I'm going to be able to? Since when have I been able to handle anything on my own?"
"Then, I guess this is our chance for each of us to do things on our own for a while." We are both very emotional, but I still had more news. "Tre, I am going back to school."
"For what? You have a great job. What do you need to go back to school for?"
"I'm going to get a degree that has to do with where I work."
"You work at a lumber yard. What do you need a degree in construction for?"
"Because I have been offered a manager position and if I get this degree in a year, which is all it's going to take to get it. I can have the store manager position. This is a great opportunity for me. I can't pass it up."
"Did this have any effect on your decision?"
"Yes, because I know you. And if we were together, I knew you'd want me to come and see you every chance I got. And when this came up a work, I couldn't pass this up. They are going to pay for the tuition and everything I need for the schooling."
Tre smiled - weakly - but it was still a smile and stands up. "Well, I hope everything works out. Can you promise me one thing?"
"What am I promising?"
"That you will still be my best friend and I can still come to you for anything."
"Tre, I told you I am not going anywhere. I am still going to be here. I promise you that I will always be here for you, no matter what. I promise I will still be your best friend and I promise you can still come to me for anything." We both smile because we knew I meant it.
"I am going to go home, now. Just don't forget..."
"Don't forget what?"
"How much I love you." With that Tre kisses me on the cheek and leaves my house. I sit there in silence and touch my cheek where he had just laid his lips.
"I love you, too..."
A few months flew by. Tre and I still stayed best friends, like we promised. But Tre had started dating somebody else. (Yeah, it hurt, but it was my choice to end what we had, so I had to live with him dating other girls.) The guys released 'Dookie' - their best record so far. And right before Billie and Adie got married, Tre found me. He looked almost as scared as he did that night.
"Holly, I need to tell you something..."
