Worry Rock, chapter 1
Billie Joe's POV
It pisses me off that everyone gets mad at me, its my fault I know that, but I can't help it. Joey hates me. I don't fight with him though because I know he's right. Adie cries for me as she watches me with the switchblade. I don't talk to her about it because then I'd have to tell her about what happened. Tre is frightened by me. I don't want to scare him I just do. Mike is about to breakdown because of me. He worries so much about me and I know he gets stressed easily. Jakob is never around and it makes me sad that he's like me in that way. Letting them know what I tried to do would only make them hate me and worry more. I woke up at Mike's as usual yesterday, he tried to talk to me but I wouldn't say anything.
"Why do you do it? Why do you hurt us by hurting yourself? Don't you think we deserve better?"
I blinked as he lectured.
"I signed the papers, they're probably married by now. Adie and Stella's mom signed too. For fuck`s sake she's only thirteen, Billie Joe, she can't be married at thirteen!"
I look at him, my kid married his, wow. Welcome to the most fucked up family ever Stella. I go straight to his cabinet and down a bottle of Taaka without even offering some to Mike. Getting drunk isn't fun anymore but then again nothing is. I want to tell him that the gun jammed, I want to tell him that but I can't want to tell everyone but then it will make me feel like even more of a failure. While I'm drinking Joey and Stella walk in.
"Ah, fuck he's at it again!" Joey yells.
He signals Stella to leave the sight that both of them have seen their parents do far too many times. I start to cry when Mike walks over and grabs the bottle.
"I'm not letting you leave until you tell me what's wrong!" Mike cries.
He calls Adrienne and she comes right over, it's an intervention.
Adie's POV
I drive to Mike's house to save my husband and my marriage. I tried to find Jake but he's always out with his friends. I'm thinking Joey and Stella being married so young. I'm the wife of an alcoholic, mother of a drug addict, and I'm sure either I'll either be a grandmother or the mother of a divorce` soon. I pull in the driveway and walk in the house. Mike's losing it, Billie's crying and Joey's yelling while Stella shakes. Now that I'm here Mike asks me to talk to him.
"Billie Joe, sweetie look at me, look at me, you don't have to talk just listen," I say this hoping it will sink in.
"Why do you even try anymore, Mom, face it he'll never come around, he'll always just sit and drink and never say anything," Joey yells.
Billie Joe is still crying, at least he's showing some emotion.
"Roll up your sleeves Dad, for fuck`s sake show everyone what you do at night while you ruin people's lives!" Joey screams and Billie Joe winces.
Billie Joe keeps crying and rolls them up. The cuts are deep and Stella runs away.
"Now look at what you've done!" Joey yells as he follows Stella.
I hold him and Mike nods and calls Joey and Stella back into the room.
"Apologize, Joey!" I yell.
"Why should I? Will he clean up if I do? No!"
Stella is crushed and confused. Finally, Billie Joe speaks.
"I'll clean up, Joey, I promise. I'm so sorry,"
We're all shocked by him speaking. Joey spits in his face and tells him he's lying and then starts to cry.
Mike's POV
I watch my daughter and my best friend's son hold each other while Joey drops "I'm so sorry" like its going out style. The room is sad and quiet, Adie sits by Billie Joe. I think about how it might have played out if Tre or Jakob were here, but the fact of the matter is that they're both getting drunk I'm sure. If anyone else had done what Billie Joe did I would hate them forever there's something about him that makes you want to save him. I don't know if I can save him anymore, though, it kills me knowing he'll always be in pain. Now I hope I can rest easy knowing that at least he's Billie Joe again no matter how much that worries me.
It pisses me off that everyone gets mad at me, its my fault I know that, but I can't help it. Joey hates me. I don't fight with him though because I know he's right. Adie cries for me as she watches me with the switchblade. I don't talk to her about it because then I'd have to tell her about what happened. Tre is frightened by me. I don't want to scare him I just do. Mike is about to breakdown because of me. He worries so much about me and I know he gets stressed easily. Jakob is never around and it makes me sad that he's like me in that way. Letting them know what I tried to do would only make them hate me and worry more. I woke up at Mike's as usual yesterday, he tried to talk to me but I wouldn't say anything.
"Why do you do it? Why do you hurt us by hurting yourself? Don't you think we deserve better?"
I blinked as he lectured.
"I signed the papers, they're probably married by now. Adie and Stella's mom signed too. For fuck`s sake she's only thirteen, Billie Joe, she can't be married at thirteen!"
I look at him, my kid married his, wow. Welcome to the most fucked up family ever Stella. I go straight to his cabinet and down a bottle of Taaka without even offering some to Mike. Getting drunk isn't fun anymore but then again nothing is. I want to tell him that the gun jammed, I want to tell him that but I can't want to tell everyone but then it will make me feel like even more of a failure. While I'm drinking Joey and Stella walk in.
"Ah, fuck he's at it again!" Joey yells.
He signals Stella to leave the sight that both of them have seen their parents do far too many times. I start to cry when Mike walks over and grabs the bottle.
"I'm not letting you leave until you tell me what's wrong!" Mike cries.
He calls Adrienne and she comes right over, it's an intervention.
Adie's POV
I drive to Mike's house to save my husband and my marriage. I tried to find Jake but he's always out with his friends. I'm thinking Joey and Stella being married so young. I'm the wife of an alcoholic, mother of a drug addict, and I'm sure either I'll either be a grandmother or the mother of a divorce` soon. I pull in the driveway and walk in the house. Mike's losing it, Billie's crying and Joey's yelling while Stella shakes. Now that I'm here Mike asks me to talk to him.
"Billie Joe, sweetie look at me, look at me, you don't have to talk just listen," I say this hoping it will sink in.
"Why do you even try anymore, Mom, face it he'll never come around, he'll always just sit and drink and never say anything," Joey yells.
Billie Joe is still crying, at least he's showing some emotion.
"Roll up your sleeves Dad, for fuck`s sake show everyone what you do at night while you ruin people's lives!" Joey screams and Billie Joe winces.
Billie Joe keeps crying and rolls them up. The cuts are deep and Stella runs away.
"Now look at what you've done!" Joey yells as he follows Stella.
I hold him and Mike nods and calls Joey and Stella back into the room.
"Apologize, Joey!" I yell.
"Why should I? Will he clean up if I do? No!"
Stella is crushed and confused. Finally, Billie Joe speaks.
"I'll clean up, Joey, I promise. I'm so sorry,"
We're all shocked by him speaking. Joey spits in his face and tells him he's lying and then starts to cry.
Mike's POV
I watch my daughter and my best friend's son hold each other while Joey drops "I'm so sorry" like its going out style. The room is sad and quiet, Adie sits by Billie Joe. I think about how it might have played out if Tre or Jakob were here, but the fact of the matter is that they're both getting drunk I'm sure. If anyone else had done what Billie Joe did I would hate them forever there's something about him that makes you want to save him. I don't know if I can save him anymore, though, it kills me knowing he'll always be in pain. Now I hope I can rest easy knowing that at least he's Billie Joe again no matter how much that worries me.
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