Destination Unknown (sequel to Worlds Apart), chapter 3
I don’t know if I mentioned this before, but I had another reason to be anxious about going to San Francisco. I have a chronic fear of flying. I mean, I think we’ve established I’m a worrier, so if I can get worked up about screwing up a gig, the thought of being trapped in a pressurized tube and shot 35000 feet above sea level at 1000kph is enough to cause some real problems for me. I always put it out of my mind until the day I actually have to go anywhere, cause lets face it, it’s the only way, but this time I forgot just how much the whole experience freaks me out. And I was emotional enough getting on that plane. I couldn’t believe I wasn’t going to see my family for 8 months. Add to that a teary visit from Tom (who was supposedly ‘over me’) the night before, in which he begged me not to go and said he couldn’t go back to Newcastle without me and I was a complete wreck.
I worried me greatly that I seemed to be the only person listening to the in-case-of-emergency talk before take-off and looking at the pictures of inexplicably cheerful passengers putting on oxygen masks and lifejackets. I gripped the armrests, squeezed my tearful eyes shut and pretended I was anywhere else as we shot into the sky. I looked out of the window and watched Heathrow get smaller and smaller until all I could see was clouds. As I thought, the ten hour journey was total hell. We hit some serious turbulence over the Atlantic and when everything started shaking I found I couldn’t breathe. I remembered Ellen telling me not to worry about turbulence, and that as long as the air stewards were still wandering about then it was minor. I looked for the air stewards. They were strapped into their seats. Holy fuck.
I was amazed when we landed in Chicago. I coukln’t believe I was still alive, and the thought of having to get on another plane made me feel sick. I had a long wait, so I sat down in the lounge with my head in my hands. I needed to get a grip. I traveled most the way round the world with Tom in our Gap year, and I’d been fine. But then Tom had been there, holding my hand, and I knew that if the plane fell out of the sky, at least I wouldn’t be on my own. I needed to call someone, but I didn’t have enough money to make a call. Then I thought, I didn’t have enough to make an international call. I had enough to make a call within the US.
Billie Joe took ages to answer.
“Are you ok?� he asked, hearing my voice.
“I’m feeling a bit shit� I said, shakily, “I had a bad flight.�
“You’re their already?!�
“No, I’m in Chicago� I replied, my voice cracking, “I’ve got another flight in…some time. I don’t know. What time is it?�
“In Chicago? Oh…about noon I think. I didn’t know you were afraid of flying�
“Everyone should be afraid of flying� I replied, darkly.
He laughed,
“You don’t need to worry� he said, “I do it all the time and I’m ok. You have more chance of getting run down by a bus…did you know that?�
“I don’t believe that.� I said, “What are you doing?�
“Driving� he replied,
“Are you still in New York?�
“Yeah� he said,
“How is it?�
“It’s alright� he said, “What time do you land in San Francisco?�
“Ummm�
I checked my ticket.
“Five thirty�
“Are you flying into SFO?�
“Uhhh….yeah. SFO. Why?�
“Just wondering. Look Soph, seriously, don’t worry. My advice, get a whisky or something before you get on. You’ll feel better. I have to go now, I’ve just pulled into a gas station�
“Ok. I’ll call you soon and let you know how I’m getting on�
“Yeah, definitely do that and…I’ll see you in a couple of weeks I guess�
I took Billie Joe’s advice about the whisky, and it worked. I slept all the way to San Francisco. When I arrived, I felt like a wreck. I’d felt too nervous to eat anything the whole way, and my body was telling me it was 2am. But the relief to be on solid ground was incredible. I shakily went to pick up my bags. I hadn’t traveled light, and my lack of energy made it near impossible to heave my bag off the carousel. Luckily, a guy next to me helped me out, lifting it off the conveyor belt and putting it down next to me. I wearily looked up to thank him, and felt like I’d been punched in the gut.
“Billie Joe!�
He laughed as I threw myself at him, my legs giving way beneath me.
“Woaaahh� he smiled into my hair, “Take it easy. Are you ok?�
“What the… what the fuck are you doing here?! You told me you were in New York…you liar!�
He grinned, releasing me from his arms and taking my face in his hands.
“Well, Tre’s sick, so we had to cancel all our bookings for the next few days. So I got some time off and I thought you might need a friend when you first arrived. I thought it might be fun to surprise you.�
I was so happy, I almost started to cry. In fact I did a little. But I didn’t care. I put my arms around his neck and kissed him. I couldn’t believe he’d traveled all this way to just to be here for me for a few days.
“This is the most amazing, romantic thing anyone has ever done for me� I grinned, my nose pressing against his.
“Well, that’s me…I’m just an amazing, romantic guy� he said with mock arrogance, running a hand through his hair.
“You are� I giggled.
“And I see you survived the flight…I told you you’d be ok�
“I took your advice about the whisky� I explained, “It really worked. I’ve slept all the way.�
“I bet you’re pretty tired, huh?�
“I feel like shit�
“No problem� he smiled, picking up my bag again and putting his free arm round my shoulders “Come on, I’ll take you to the car. And what the fuck have you packed in this bag…�
When we got in Billie Joe’s car I curled up in the passenger seat with my knees up against my chest and rested my head against the window. I couldn’t remember ever feeling so tired. I looked out of the window at the brilliant blue sky watching all the huge American cars go by and trying to keep my eyes open. Then I remembered I had booked a motel.
“I’m supposed to be going to the airport inn tonight� I said, “Not my apartment. I figured I’d try and find that tomorrow.�
“I figured the same� Billie said, glancing over at me, “But which would you rather…a night at the Airport Inn or a night at Hotel Billie Joe?�
I smiled,
“Hmm…it’s a close one,� I said, “Do you do breakfast?�
“Definitely.� He said, “I’ll even make you real coffee.�
“Ohhh, ok, sold� I smiled, as he took the exit for Oakland. I was getting all tingly and nervous-excited at the realization that we were actually going to his house. I must have fallen asleep again though because the next thing I knew we were in his driveway and he was gently shaking me awake, his soft green eyes staring into mine.
His house was amazing. I had been kind of nervous that it was going to be some huge mansion that I would feel really uncomfortable in but it wasn’t like that. It was really cool. He started flicking through the biggest stack of mail I had ever seen, but gave up halfway.
“This is what happens when you don’t spend much time at home,� he said, with a smile. “So you want something to eat?�
“I…actually, what I really want more than anything is a shower�
“Oh, ok sure� he said, smiling, “You can take a bath if you want, while I make some food�
“You are amazing�
He laughed,
“I just know how long haul trips make you feel�
It felt so good to get clean. I stayed in the tub for so long because it felt so good and I didn’t have the energy to get out again. In fact, I was fighting to stay awake. Then I heard a soft knock at the door,
“Soph…you haven’t fallen asleep in there have you?�
“Not quite�
“I bet your fingers have gone all wrinkly�
I giggled as I studied them.
“Yeah, they have a little�
“That’s a sign you should get out, you know�
“Ok� I sighed, “I’ll get out.�
When I got downstairs I felt bad cause I could hardly eat anything. I think my stomach had gone to bed. But Billie didn’t seem to mind. I rested my head in his lap and he stroked my hair as we watched TV. I must have dropped off for a few minutes cause suddenly I was in Billie Joe’s arms and he was carrying me out of the room.
“Where are you taking me?� I asked, sleepily,
“To bed� he smiled,
“What’s the time�
“About eleven�
“Really? I did pretty well to stay up that long�
He raised his eyebrows as we started up the stairs.
“Are you kidding? You passed out on me like three hours ago�
“Oh. Sorry� I said,
“Ah, that’s ok� he smiled, as he lay me down on his bed, “You’ve had a pretty rough day�
“No, its all good now� I smiled, as he lay down beside me. He smiled back and kissed me, then wrapped his arms around me.
“It feels so weird to have you here� he said quietly, “But good, I mean. Really good�
“That’s how it feels to be here,� I said, “Weird but good.�
He smiled.
“Kind of like you then� he said, “Weird but good�
I grinned, and he laughed, and then he kissed me again.
I worried me greatly that I seemed to be the only person listening to the in-case-of-emergency talk before take-off and looking at the pictures of inexplicably cheerful passengers putting on oxygen masks and lifejackets. I gripped the armrests, squeezed my tearful eyes shut and pretended I was anywhere else as we shot into the sky. I looked out of the window and watched Heathrow get smaller and smaller until all I could see was clouds. As I thought, the ten hour journey was total hell. We hit some serious turbulence over the Atlantic and when everything started shaking I found I couldn’t breathe. I remembered Ellen telling me not to worry about turbulence, and that as long as the air stewards were still wandering about then it was minor. I looked for the air stewards. They were strapped into their seats. Holy fuck.
I was amazed when we landed in Chicago. I coukln’t believe I was still alive, and the thought of having to get on another plane made me feel sick. I had a long wait, so I sat down in the lounge with my head in my hands. I needed to get a grip. I traveled most the way round the world with Tom in our Gap year, and I’d been fine. But then Tom had been there, holding my hand, and I knew that if the plane fell out of the sky, at least I wouldn’t be on my own. I needed to call someone, but I didn’t have enough money to make a call. Then I thought, I didn’t have enough to make an international call. I had enough to make a call within the US.
Billie Joe took ages to answer.
“Are you ok?� he asked, hearing my voice.
“I’m feeling a bit shit� I said, shakily, “I had a bad flight.�
“You’re their already?!�
“No, I’m in Chicago� I replied, my voice cracking, “I’ve got another flight in…some time. I don’t know. What time is it?�
“In Chicago? Oh…about noon I think. I didn’t know you were afraid of flying�
“Everyone should be afraid of flying� I replied, darkly.
He laughed,
“You don’t need to worry� he said, “I do it all the time and I’m ok. You have more chance of getting run down by a bus…did you know that?�
“I don’t believe that.� I said, “What are you doing?�
“Driving� he replied,
“Are you still in New York?�
“Yeah� he said,
“How is it?�
“It’s alright� he said, “What time do you land in San Francisco?�
“Ummm�
I checked my ticket.
“Five thirty�
“Are you flying into SFO?�
“Uhhh….yeah. SFO. Why?�
“Just wondering. Look Soph, seriously, don’t worry. My advice, get a whisky or something before you get on. You’ll feel better. I have to go now, I’ve just pulled into a gas station�
“Ok. I’ll call you soon and let you know how I’m getting on�
“Yeah, definitely do that and…I’ll see you in a couple of weeks I guess�
I took Billie Joe’s advice about the whisky, and it worked. I slept all the way to San Francisco. When I arrived, I felt like a wreck. I’d felt too nervous to eat anything the whole way, and my body was telling me it was 2am. But the relief to be on solid ground was incredible. I shakily went to pick up my bags. I hadn’t traveled light, and my lack of energy made it near impossible to heave my bag off the carousel. Luckily, a guy next to me helped me out, lifting it off the conveyor belt and putting it down next to me. I wearily looked up to thank him, and felt like I’d been punched in the gut.
“Billie Joe!�
He laughed as I threw myself at him, my legs giving way beneath me.
“Woaaahh� he smiled into my hair, “Take it easy. Are you ok?�
“What the… what the fuck are you doing here?! You told me you were in New York…you liar!�
He grinned, releasing me from his arms and taking my face in his hands.
“Well, Tre’s sick, so we had to cancel all our bookings for the next few days. So I got some time off and I thought you might need a friend when you first arrived. I thought it might be fun to surprise you.�
I was so happy, I almost started to cry. In fact I did a little. But I didn’t care. I put my arms around his neck and kissed him. I couldn’t believe he’d traveled all this way to just to be here for me for a few days.
“This is the most amazing, romantic thing anyone has ever done for me� I grinned, my nose pressing against his.
“Well, that’s me…I’m just an amazing, romantic guy� he said with mock arrogance, running a hand through his hair.
“You are� I giggled.
“And I see you survived the flight…I told you you’d be ok�
“I took your advice about the whisky� I explained, “It really worked. I’ve slept all the way.�
“I bet you’re pretty tired, huh?�
“I feel like shit�
“No problem� he smiled, picking up my bag again and putting his free arm round my shoulders “Come on, I’ll take you to the car. And what the fuck have you packed in this bag…�
When we got in Billie Joe’s car I curled up in the passenger seat with my knees up against my chest and rested my head against the window. I couldn’t remember ever feeling so tired. I looked out of the window at the brilliant blue sky watching all the huge American cars go by and trying to keep my eyes open. Then I remembered I had booked a motel.
“I’m supposed to be going to the airport inn tonight� I said, “Not my apartment. I figured I’d try and find that tomorrow.�
“I figured the same� Billie said, glancing over at me, “But which would you rather…a night at the Airport Inn or a night at Hotel Billie Joe?�
I smiled,
“Hmm…it’s a close one,� I said, “Do you do breakfast?�
“Definitely.� He said, “I’ll even make you real coffee.�
“Ohhh, ok, sold� I smiled, as he took the exit for Oakland. I was getting all tingly and nervous-excited at the realization that we were actually going to his house. I must have fallen asleep again though because the next thing I knew we were in his driveway and he was gently shaking me awake, his soft green eyes staring into mine.
His house was amazing. I had been kind of nervous that it was going to be some huge mansion that I would feel really uncomfortable in but it wasn’t like that. It was really cool. He started flicking through the biggest stack of mail I had ever seen, but gave up halfway.
“This is what happens when you don’t spend much time at home,� he said, with a smile. “So you want something to eat?�
“I…actually, what I really want more than anything is a shower�
“Oh, ok sure� he said, smiling, “You can take a bath if you want, while I make some food�
“You are amazing�
He laughed,
“I just know how long haul trips make you feel�
It felt so good to get clean. I stayed in the tub for so long because it felt so good and I didn’t have the energy to get out again. In fact, I was fighting to stay awake. Then I heard a soft knock at the door,
“Soph…you haven’t fallen asleep in there have you?�
“Not quite�
“I bet your fingers have gone all wrinkly�
I giggled as I studied them.
“Yeah, they have a little�
“That’s a sign you should get out, you know�
“Ok� I sighed, “I’ll get out.�
When I got downstairs I felt bad cause I could hardly eat anything. I think my stomach had gone to bed. But Billie didn’t seem to mind. I rested my head in his lap and he stroked my hair as we watched TV. I must have dropped off for a few minutes cause suddenly I was in Billie Joe’s arms and he was carrying me out of the room.
“Where are you taking me?� I asked, sleepily,
“To bed� he smiled,
“What’s the time�
“About eleven�
“Really? I did pretty well to stay up that long�
He raised his eyebrows as we started up the stairs.
“Are you kidding? You passed out on me like three hours ago�
“Oh. Sorry� I said,
“Ah, that’s ok� he smiled, as he lay me down on his bed, “You’ve had a pretty rough day�
“No, its all good now� I smiled, as he lay down beside me. He smiled back and kissed me, then wrapped his arms around me.
“It feels so weird to have you here� he said quietly, “But good, I mean. Really good�
“That’s how it feels to be here,� I said, “Weird but good.�
He smiled.
“Kind of like you then� he said, “Weird but good�
I grinned, and he laughed, and then he kissed me again.
