"Hi, I'm Your Neighbour.", chapter 16
So, I got a cast, a black one, on my left arm. It was going to be real hard for the next month or so. I just woke up and am sitting on the edge of my bed. Did you know sleeping with a cast is complete hell? I picked up my cell phone and dialled Ethan's number, to tell him what had happened.
"Yo. Ethan says 'What up?!'" he said. I laughed.
"Ha, ha. It's your wife. Your wife says 'A lot'."
"Ooooh," he cooed, "what happened?"
"Billie came home drunk last night and broke my wrist. Any questions?"
"Ah crap, and no. By the way, me is almost home."
"Yay! Ethan's comin' home!!!" I said, he giggled.
"Yeesh, and I'm bringing my mommy."
"Coolio. I've never met her. Wow..."
"Yup. Shee you shoon."
"Bye."
"I went up to this gangsta thug and he was like 'Yo, mutha fucka.' WEEEE!!!!"
I loved the WEEE video!
"Lovesh you."
"Lovesh you too. Bye, Ethan."
And I hung up. I then woke the twins and Billie Joe up. Billie agreed to pay for the cast and shit as an apology. We were on good terms now, I really didn't care what happened in the past. I pranked him this morning, actually.
Flashback, this morning
Billie's POV
Argh, I just woke up. I went into the kitchen and found a post it note. I really couldn't understand the words, so I kept reading it out loud. Over and over I read it, but I still couldn't understand, then I heard some giggling. What the hell? Finally, the person(s) just could NOT hold it in, and rolled out on the floor crying, and cracking up sooo hard.
"What the fuck?!"
Nikki, Jakob, and Jay were almost crying.
"Read it again, asshole." Nikki laughed.
"I AM SOFA KIND WEE TODD DID."
Then even Ethan walked in almost crying. Everyone but me was laughing their ass off. I didn't get it.
"Read it AGAIN!" Nikki cried.
"No fucking way am I reading it again I don't even know what the hell I'm saying." I said.
Flashback Over
We were sitting in the living room watching Bullet in a Bible. It came to the part where Billie put the devil horns headband on his head and looked around. When he did this, Jay said:
"Billie's horny!" and laughed. You see, he really did not know the meaning we come to today. Jakob nudged him and said,
"Don't say that, you moron." and both of them laughed. Then it came to the masturbation scene.
"Nope, now Billie's horny." said Billie Joe. I laughed.
"I don't get it." said the twins.
"You don't want to, nor need to, guys." I said.
"Ok."
Then the front door opened and Ethan and his mom walked in. I immediately turned the TV off so we could greet he and his mom. As Ethan's mom stepped forward, he noticed something and started making hand signs and mouthing words to me.
"Are you ok?" he pointed to his arm. I nodded. "Do not wear a studded belt around my mom." he mouthed.
"Shit. Ah well, it's my wardrobe." I mouthed back. He shrugged and smiled. Oopsie.
She stepped toward me and shook my hand sweetly.
"It's nice to meet you." she said.
"Ditto," I said, shaking her hand. I showed her to a room and she unpacked her things and Billie Joe went home to solve things with Adrienne. Turns out, Adie was pissed because his Jakob did something wrong or something inappropriate and Billie didn't punish him. Whoop-dee-doo, Basil.
I met Ethan in Venice, Florida. You see, I'm originally from Ohio, then moved to Florida, then to California. Believe it. My parents moved me everywhere. Weird how Ethan's parents moved to California at the same time mine did, too. I introduced his mom to the boys and then the rest of the day was a very boring day.
We decided to take her to Rudie's to get some lunch together. On the way to Rudie's, Ethan was searching for a good radio station, because the drive was at least 10 minutes. He went from country to rap and then said:
"There's only country and rap. It's c-rap." (crap)
At this, I cracked up.
"Oh my God, how did you get that?!" I laughed.
"I have my influences..." he nudged me.
"Aww, why thanks you." I smiled.
We got to Rudie's, ate lunch, and after that went home. I checked my phone messages and was shocked at one from the Berkeley police department.
"Hello, ma'am. This is the Berkeley police department and we have received a call from the Venice, Florida police department of a Carolyn Calhoun. We understand you're her daughter and you're needed to sort things out. Please contact us as soon as possible."
Shit.
"Yo. Ethan says 'What up?!'" he said. I laughed.
"Ha, ha. It's your wife. Your wife says 'A lot'."
"Ooooh," he cooed, "what happened?"
"Billie came home drunk last night and broke my wrist. Any questions?"
"Ah crap, and no. By the way, me is almost home."
"Yay! Ethan's comin' home!!!" I said, he giggled.
"Yeesh, and I'm bringing my mommy."
"Coolio. I've never met her. Wow..."
"Yup. Shee you shoon."
"Bye."
"I went up to this gangsta thug and he was like 'Yo, mutha fucka.' WEEEE!!!!"
I loved the WEEE video!
"Lovesh you."
"Lovesh you too. Bye, Ethan."
And I hung up. I then woke the twins and Billie Joe up. Billie agreed to pay for the cast and shit as an apology. We were on good terms now, I really didn't care what happened in the past. I pranked him this morning, actually.
Flashback, this morning
Billie's POV
Argh, I just woke up. I went into the kitchen and found a post it note. I really couldn't understand the words, so I kept reading it out loud. Over and over I read it, but I still couldn't understand, then I heard some giggling. What the hell? Finally, the person(s) just could NOT hold it in, and rolled out on the floor crying, and cracking up sooo hard.
"What the fuck?!"
Nikki, Jakob, and Jay were almost crying.
"Read it again, asshole." Nikki laughed.
"I AM SOFA KIND WEE TODD DID."
Then even Ethan walked in almost crying. Everyone but me was laughing their ass off. I didn't get it.
"Read it AGAIN!" Nikki cried.
"No fucking way am I reading it again I don't even know what the hell I'm saying." I said.
Flashback Over
We were sitting in the living room watching Bullet in a Bible. It came to the part where Billie put the devil horns headband on his head and looked around. When he did this, Jay said:
"Billie's horny!" and laughed. You see, he really did not know the meaning we come to today. Jakob nudged him and said,
"Don't say that, you moron." and both of them laughed. Then it came to the masturbation scene.
"Nope, now Billie's horny." said Billie Joe. I laughed.
"I don't get it." said the twins.
"You don't want to, nor need to, guys." I said.
"Ok."
Then the front door opened and Ethan and his mom walked in. I immediately turned the TV off so we could greet he and his mom. As Ethan's mom stepped forward, he noticed something and started making hand signs and mouthing words to me.
"Are you ok?" he pointed to his arm. I nodded. "Do not wear a studded belt around my mom." he mouthed.
"Shit. Ah well, it's my wardrobe." I mouthed back. He shrugged and smiled. Oopsie.
She stepped toward me and shook my hand sweetly.
"It's nice to meet you." she said.
"Ditto," I said, shaking her hand. I showed her to a room and she unpacked her things and Billie Joe went home to solve things with Adrienne. Turns out, Adie was pissed because his Jakob did something wrong or something inappropriate and Billie didn't punish him. Whoop-dee-doo, Basil.
I met Ethan in Venice, Florida. You see, I'm originally from Ohio, then moved to Florida, then to California. Believe it. My parents moved me everywhere. Weird how Ethan's parents moved to California at the same time mine did, too. I introduced his mom to the boys and then the rest of the day was a very boring day.
We decided to take her to Rudie's to get some lunch together. On the way to Rudie's, Ethan was searching for a good radio station, because the drive was at least 10 minutes. He went from country to rap and then said:
"There's only country and rap. It's c-rap." (crap)
At this, I cracked up.
"Oh my God, how did you get that?!" I laughed.
"I have my influences..." he nudged me.
"Aww, why thanks you." I smiled.
We got to Rudie's, ate lunch, and after that went home. I checked my phone messages and was shocked at one from the Berkeley police department.
"Hello, ma'am. This is the Berkeley police department and we have received a call from the Venice, Florida police department of a Carolyn Calhoun. We understand you're her daughter and you're needed to sort things out. Please contact us as soon as possible."
Shit.
