Sweet Children Come Out and Play, chapter 8
On the way back to the hotel Billie and Delphine sat quietly in the back, staring at each other, smiling. It was dark out. "Did you like the show?"
"I loved it."
As they walked in through the door, Delphine headed towards their special little room. It was not very often they got the room; usually it was a couch or the van. She plopped down on the bed. Billie ran after her, guitar still in hand. He dropped it at the door. Then he ran over to the bed and jumped on, practically landing on top of her. "Tired sweetie?"
"A bit. Hey, Billie, I was wondering about something."
"Shoot."
"Well, we're getting married soon and I was wondering... I know there is not a whole lot of money but... well, you know I have always wanted kids-"
"Yeah," Billie smiled a little.
"And we're only 18 and 19, but I was wondering what we were thinking about for having kids. I mean, someday. We don't have to talk about it right now and you could just think if you want."
"No, it's fine. I was kind of wondering too, you know, since we're getting married. That seems to be the next thing. Shit, but I don't think I would make a very great father."
"Oh, I think you would be an awesome dad! I would not have agreed to marry you if you weren't and then you would probably be just a big asshole."
"But I am an asshole."
"Fine, you're my asshole."
"
Ha! Um, really though, you want kids?"
"I do. I always have. Where you expecting that?" she asked cautiously.
"I knew you wanted kids when I asked you to marry me. I meant it. I do want kids one day. Sooner than later. I want to be around for them as long as I can be. You know, not everyone gets the chance." Delphine smiled. "But what about you going to college? If you still want to do that."
"I don't know. I guess I only wanted a degree so I could show my kids and have some statues but it would not be for a job. Would that just be a waste of money? Or is it lazy. All I have ever really wanted in my life was to have children and be a stay-at-home mom. I always envied the perfect fifties housewives that got to stay home and did not even have to attend college. I mean, they weren't always happy, in the fifties, but I would have been. Does that sound shallow?"
"No. Well, I dropped out of high school. I can't be the one to tell you anything," Billie kissed her cheek. "I love you no matter what you do. If you want to go to college, I'll move in with you except for on tours, wherever you go - and I'll have to convince Tre and Mike to come with me."
"You're so sweet. I don't know. My parents always said they would pay for college but I just don't know how they would with my sisters and my brother. That's putting four kids through college! Shit. And I am so happy just like this. I wish I could just get paid for helping you guys - you know - moral support."
"Hell, if I had the money, I would pay you for all those times of moral support!"
"Aww... but I'm not a prostitute," she smiled, "You just give me money anyway!"
Billie laughed. "Well, it's up to you. Look, if you could do whatever you wanted, not according to if it's right or not, what would it be."
"I guess that's pretty easy. I would probably... not go to college and have a baby right away. Then I could stay with the band and tour and I could keep the baby with us until it's four and has to go to preschool. I guess I would have to go on less touring then but I think it would be all right and I would have another baby some time latter. By then, Sweet Children will be going all over on the world tours and I'd rather be home sometimes."
Billie smiled at her, "Well, you have it all planed out. What's holding you back?"
"People. They will say that we are too young to be fixing our life like this now and I should go to school and get a real job. Damn it, I hate school and I just got out of it."
"So you want to have a baby now huh? You feel like you are ready?"
"I think so. I'll learn. I don't know how much more I could be ready. I have baby-sat kids from 5 months old and up since I was twelve and my sisters before that. It will be different when it's our baby - wow, our baby - I have always said 'my baby' - now there's actually another person in there," she giggled. "See, I've been imaging it since I was little. I used to pretend my dolls and Legos and Playmobil were always having babies and they would have tons of kids."
"How many do you want?"
"I have always thought four was a good number, like my mom."
"Six is too many. I love them all but there's not enough attention. My bothers and sisters practically raised me. Not my mom's fault. I like that you'll be there for our kids though. So long as I can come up with the money."
"I'm sure we will, whatever we do. If it means I have to go work at Target then so be it."
Billie paused for a second, "Look, Delphine, I want to have kids too I think. I'm more excited about it now." He took her hand. "What do you want to do? Because, if you are ready to have a baby right now, then I am too."
Delphine put one hand over her heart, "Really Billie?"
"Yeah."
"Well, this is a big decision." Delphine sat mulling it over. "If we do this now, it will change the rest of our lives. I want to more than anything though. I do." She looked again to Billie. "Are you positive?"
"Yes. I am."
Delphine bit her lip. "You know what. Ok."
"You really want to?" he looked a little shocked as the prospect of a baby became more real. "Babies are for life. You think you want to be looking at me for the rest of my life?"
"Yes, I do." She kissed him.
"Ok," Billie kissed her back. And again. "I love you."
"I love you too."
Billie slid his hands around her waist and kissed her neck. Delphine pulled his black shirt off over his head. Then, instead of taking a birth-control pill, she left the nightstand alone. It was strange, a new sort of sex but extremely exciting. Delphine felt so nervous for the first time without birth-control of any kind. But at the same time, it was an incredible turn-on, dangerous. Billie could not push it out of his mind either. To think, one of these times, Delphine might get pregnant. One of these times might make a baby. He had almost forgotten that's what sex was for in the first place.
"Hey Del, how you doing?" Billie whispered as Delphine opened her eyes for the first time that morning.
"Great. I'm great," she leaned over and kissed him. The room was still dark with the shades drawn giving the room a yellowish light but a peaceful atmosphere.
"So, you still feeling good about everything?"
"Well, it's a little late now," she smiled and put a hand over his. Wow, had they really just decided last night on a whim that they were going to have a baby? Well, all right then! "And yes. I'm excited. But it may take awhile. I'm probably not pregnant from this one time you know."
"Yes, but you could be."
"True."
"You want to go get some food."
"Yeah, let's go." Delphine hopped out of bed and into the bathroom to wash her
face. Billie followed after her, which was not a very good idea, and they ended up spraying each other all over with water. "Billie! Now I'm fucking soaked." Billie just laughed.
"Yes, but on the bright side, we won't have to take a shower for like ... a week."
"I don't think so," and they both ran off to change. When Delphine and Billie walked down the little hall to the little hotel makeshift kitchen, the smell of waffles and coffee met their noses. "Well, this is nice." Brites was cooking again, but this time, they were first. "Without you, Brites, we would all starve." Just as they finished their first waffle, which was feeding each other of their plates the entire time and laughing hysterically while Brites rolled her eyes, Tre stumbled into the kitchen with Richelle close behind. They were both still in their pajamas but when Mike came in, he was already dressed.
When everyone had finally finished, Tre stuck two fingers in his mouth and stopped all the blabbering with a sheer whistle. "Dude, Tre, we hear you man now cut that out," Mike said plugging his ears.
"But what the hell are we doing today?" Tre asked.
"Um, Billie?" Mike shrugged.
"We're supposed to be back in San Francisco. It's our second to last show."
"Then we're home."
"Yep."
"Wait, Billie, you're getting married in like a week. What are you going to do once
we get back?" Tre remembered.
"Oh yeah, about that, Tre and Mike, you're my best men."
"What!" Tre wined jokingly, "Do I have to?" Richelle hit him in the arm. "I mean, fine!" he stomped like a little kid.
"Sure Billie," Mike said. Brites just gave a smile at Richelle as if to say HER boyfriend was behaving. "When's the date?"
"July second."
"Shit, we have to get suits or something."
"Oh no, just wear whatever you have," Delphine said.
"You sure?"
"Yeah, it's not that fancy."
"What about a dress for you?" Billie looked to his fiancé. "And what was in that
bag you brought home yesterday?"
"That would be the dress."
"Really, cool, man can I see it?"
"No! You have to wait until the wedding."
"Fine."
"I loved it."
As they walked in through the door, Delphine headed towards their special little room. It was not very often they got the room; usually it was a couch or the van. She plopped down on the bed. Billie ran after her, guitar still in hand. He dropped it at the door. Then he ran over to the bed and jumped on, practically landing on top of her. "Tired sweetie?"
"A bit. Hey, Billie, I was wondering about something."
"Shoot."
"Well, we're getting married soon and I was wondering... I know there is not a whole lot of money but... well, you know I have always wanted kids-"
"Yeah," Billie smiled a little.
"And we're only 18 and 19, but I was wondering what we were thinking about for having kids. I mean, someday. We don't have to talk about it right now and you could just think if you want."
"No, it's fine. I was kind of wondering too, you know, since we're getting married. That seems to be the next thing. Shit, but I don't think I would make a very great father."
"Oh, I think you would be an awesome dad! I would not have agreed to marry you if you weren't and then you would probably be just a big asshole."
"But I am an asshole."
"Fine, you're my asshole."
"
Ha! Um, really though, you want kids?"
"I do. I always have. Where you expecting that?" she asked cautiously.
"I knew you wanted kids when I asked you to marry me. I meant it. I do want kids one day. Sooner than later. I want to be around for them as long as I can be. You know, not everyone gets the chance." Delphine smiled. "But what about you going to college? If you still want to do that."
"I don't know. I guess I only wanted a degree so I could show my kids and have some statues but it would not be for a job. Would that just be a waste of money? Or is it lazy. All I have ever really wanted in my life was to have children and be a stay-at-home mom. I always envied the perfect fifties housewives that got to stay home and did not even have to attend college. I mean, they weren't always happy, in the fifties, but I would have been. Does that sound shallow?"
"No. Well, I dropped out of high school. I can't be the one to tell you anything," Billie kissed her cheek. "I love you no matter what you do. If you want to go to college, I'll move in with you except for on tours, wherever you go - and I'll have to convince Tre and Mike to come with me."
"You're so sweet. I don't know. My parents always said they would pay for college but I just don't know how they would with my sisters and my brother. That's putting four kids through college! Shit. And I am so happy just like this. I wish I could just get paid for helping you guys - you know - moral support."
"Hell, if I had the money, I would pay you for all those times of moral support!"
"Aww... but I'm not a prostitute," she smiled, "You just give me money anyway!"
Billie laughed. "Well, it's up to you. Look, if you could do whatever you wanted, not according to if it's right or not, what would it be."
"I guess that's pretty easy. I would probably... not go to college and have a baby right away. Then I could stay with the band and tour and I could keep the baby with us until it's four and has to go to preschool. I guess I would have to go on less touring then but I think it would be all right and I would have another baby some time latter. By then, Sweet Children will be going all over on the world tours and I'd rather be home sometimes."
Billie smiled at her, "Well, you have it all planed out. What's holding you back?"
"People. They will say that we are too young to be fixing our life like this now and I should go to school and get a real job. Damn it, I hate school and I just got out of it."
"So you want to have a baby now huh? You feel like you are ready?"
"I think so. I'll learn. I don't know how much more I could be ready. I have baby-sat kids from 5 months old and up since I was twelve and my sisters before that. It will be different when it's our baby - wow, our baby - I have always said 'my baby' - now there's actually another person in there," she giggled. "See, I've been imaging it since I was little. I used to pretend my dolls and Legos and Playmobil were always having babies and they would have tons of kids."
"How many do you want?"
"I have always thought four was a good number, like my mom."
"Six is too many. I love them all but there's not enough attention. My bothers and sisters practically raised me. Not my mom's fault. I like that you'll be there for our kids though. So long as I can come up with the money."
"I'm sure we will, whatever we do. If it means I have to go work at Target then so be it."
Billie paused for a second, "Look, Delphine, I want to have kids too I think. I'm more excited about it now." He took her hand. "What do you want to do? Because, if you are ready to have a baby right now, then I am too."
Delphine put one hand over her heart, "Really Billie?"
"Yeah."
"Well, this is a big decision." Delphine sat mulling it over. "If we do this now, it will change the rest of our lives. I want to more than anything though. I do." She looked again to Billie. "Are you positive?"
"Yes. I am."
Delphine bit her lip. "You know what. Ok."
"You really want to?" he looked a little shocked as the prospect of a baby became more real. "Babies are for life. You think you want to be looking at me for the rest of my life?"
"Yes, I do." She kissed him.
"Ok," Billie kissed her back. And again. "I love you."
"I love you too."
Billie slid his hands around her waist and kissed her neck. Delphine pulled his black shirt off over his head. Then, instead of taking a birth-control pill, she left the nightstand alone. It was strange, a new sort of sex but extremely exciting. Delphine felt so nervous for the first time without birth-control of any kind. But at the same time, it was an incredible turn-on, dangerous. Billie could not push it out of his mind either. To think, one of these times, Delphine might get pregnant. One of these times might make a baby. He had almost forgotten that's what sex was for in the first place.
"Hey Del, how you doing?" Billie whispered as Delphine opened her eyes for the first time that morning.
"Great. I'm great," she leaned over and kissed him. The room was still dark with the shades drawn giving the room a yellowish light but a peaceful atmosphere.
"So, you still feeling good about everything?"
"Well, it's a little late now," she smiled and put a hand over his. Wow, had they really just decided last night on a whim that they were going to have a baby? Well, all right then! "And yes. I'm excited. But it may take awhile. I'm probably not pregnant from this one time you know."
"Yes, but you could be."
"True."
"You want to go get some food."
"Yeah, let's go." Delphine hopped out of bed and into the bathroom to wash her
face. Billie followed after her, which was not a very good idea, and they ended up spraying each other all over with water. "Billie! Now I'm fucking soaked." Billie just laughed.
"Yes, but on the bright side, we won't have to take a shower for like ... a week."
"I don't think so," and they both ran off to change. When Delphine and Billie walked down the little hall to the little hotel makeshift kitchen, the smell of waffles and coffee met their noses. "Well, this is nice." Brites was cooking again, but this time, they were first. "Without you, Brites, we would all starve." Just as they finished their first waffle, which was feeding each other of their plates the entire time and laughing hysterically while Brites rolled her eyes, Tre stumbled into the kitchen with Richelle close behind. They were both still in their pajamas but when Mike came in, he was already dressed.
When everyone had finally finished, Tre stuck two fingers in his mouth and stopped all the blabbering with a sheer whistle. "Dude, Tre, we hear you man now cut that out," Mike said plugging his ears.
"But what the hell are we doing today?" Tre asked.
"Um, Billie?" Mike shrugged.
"We're supposed to be back in San Francisco. It's our second to last show."
"Then we're home."
"Yep."
"Wait, Billie, you're getting married in like a week. What are you going to do once
we get back?" Tre remembered.
"Oh yeah, about that, Tre and Mike, you're my best men."
"What!" Tre wined jokingly, "Do I have to?" Richelle hit him in the arm. "I mean, fine!" he stomped like a little kid.
"Sure Billie," Mike said. Brites just gave a smile at Richelle as if to say HER boyfriend was behaving. "When's the date?"
"July second."
"Shit, we have to get suits or something."
"Oh no, just wear whatever you have," Delphine said.
"You sure?"
"Yeah, it's not that fancy."
"What about a dress for you?" Billie looked to his fiancé. "And what was in that
bag you brought home yesterday?"
"That would be the dress."
"Really, cool, man can I see it?"
"No! You have to wait until the wedding."
"Fine."
