Adeline Street, chapter 10
I heard Luca's yelling frantically as I came around.
"I must see her."
"Sir, please just listen. She's in no condition for visitors right now."
"What happened?"
"There was an accident. A drunk driver hit her on the driver's side. Sir please just wait with Mr. Armstrong and we will get you when we've checked her."
I heard him say something obviously obscene in Italian and heard the door shut. I suddenly noticed the steady beeping of the heart machine next to the bed. Hit? By a drunk driver? It all suddenly came back to me. I opened my eyes and met the nurse's.
"Do you feel any pain?" she asked.
I couldn't speak. I could hardly open my eyes. My head was throbbing.
"Squeeze my hand- once for yes, two for no."
She gave me her hand. I squeezed it once.
"Is it your head?"
I squeezed once.
"There's a young man here named Luca Cambonelli. Do you wish to see him?"
I squeezed once.
She smiled and walked over to the door. "Be back in a minute."
Luca came in a few minutes later. His eyes were red and puffy.
"They say you nearly died. They called your mother and she called me," he said, sitting on the bed next to me.
"I nearly died?" I asked. I felt a wave of nausea sweep over me, but I held it back. I didn't wanna puke in front of Luca.
"Yes. While they were doing operation."
This didn't frighten me much since I had already had a brush with death once before. There was a knock at the door.
"Miss Stevens, Mr. Cambonelli, there's a man out here who wishes to speak with you."
"Who is it?" Luca asked.
"His name's Billie Joe."
I looked at Luca. "He'll wanna speak to me alone."
He smiled softly and nodded. He kissed me on the cheek and left the room. Billie came in and shut the door.
"I feel responsible," he said, sitting next to me on the bed. He also had been crying.
"Don't. I wasn't paying attention."
"Because you were thinking about what happened. What I did."
I didn't answer to that. He was absolutely right.
"I can't deal with this," he said.
"Don't think about it," I said, my head giving another nasty throb just thinking about it.
"I can't stop! That's just it. And look what it's done to you!" He laid his head in his hands.
I sighed and rubbed his back. "We've done this before and we got through it."
He stood up and kicked the bed hard. "YOU ALMOST FUCKING DIED!"
My head spun. I closed my eyes and tried not to throw up.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get mad." He knelt beside me and cupped my face.
"It's ok," I said softly.
"This is insane," he said, smiling with tears in his eyes.
Tears began to form in my eyes. "A little bit." I smiled back.
"I still love Adie."
"I know. Billie, if I weren't 16 years old, you would definitely be the one I would want to be with, but it's not right. And I don't know why this keeps happening to us, but you have to forget about all of this. Both of us do."
He laid his head on my shoulder. I ran my fingers through his hair. He looked back up.
"If I were a 16 year old boy I don't think I would ever let you go." He smiled.
This was scary. My head began to spin again. I felt everything begin to fall around me. The next thing I remember was hearing a doctor shout "Clear!" and felt a streak of heat fill my body. I jumped from shock.
"She's back! Check her vitals," he said, turning to his nurse.
My vision went blurry again for a moment. I felt sick.
"All normal." replied the nurse.
The doctor looked back down at me. "Can you hear me?" he asked.
I nodded.
"Then you are very lucky." He smiled. I closed my eyes and sighed. They finally cleared out of the room. I wasn't allowed to have visitors for a couple of days just in case. I was finally released two weeks later and was to be monitored on my eating. I had to have 3 actual meals and at least 2 snacks a day. I didn't want it. I just wasn't hungry. No matter what they did, I couldn't and wouldn't eat.
"You're gonna make yourself sick," Billie finally said on my 5th day home.
"I'm not hungry. I've told you five thousand times!" I said irritably. I closed my bedroom door and locked it.
"I'm serious! You're gonna regret it!" he yelled through the door.
"I'll eat when I feel like it!" I yelled back.
I got back in the studio within the next couple of weeks. It was so weird to be back. So many new songs were written while I was home I didn't know which ones to put on the record. We recorded for about 9 months before we finally finished. I was as pleased with this record as I was with the first. Billie was also pleased, but he was still very concerned about my eating habits. I was just never hungry. I did eat, but not like I was supposed to.
"I bet you haven't had 6 actual meals since your accident," he said, taking a drag off this cigarette after we left the studio the last day of recording.
"Well, like I have told you before- I eat when I'm hungry. I'm just not hungry like I used to be."
"You've got an eating disorder," Billie demanded.
"No, I just have weird eating habits. People have weird eating habits all around the world." I argued back.
"Whatever." He finally gave in.
The phone rang and he ran downstairs to get it. He came back moments later, banging on the door.
"Kayla! You've been nominated!"
"Huh?" I asked, opening the door. He threw his arms around me in a hug, nearly crushing my malnourished body.
"You've been nominated for a VMA!" he shouted again.
I stared in shock. "No way."
"Yeah! And they want you to play AND present an award!"
We celebrated for a moment and then I went to call my mom and tell her. The VMAs were coming up in about 1 month, so I had just enough time to get ready. I had to go practice at the stadium about one week before. I was pumped, but it didn't improve my eating habits and not 3 days before the VMA's, Billie was bitching again.
"You're gonna get up there and fall out if you don't pack it on fast."
"Maybe, but if I'm not hungry, I'm not eating. I'm just not hungry anymore. If I eat when I'm not hungry I get sick."
"Cuz you never eat!" he fought back. I was sick of hearing it. I should have listened...
"I must see her."
"Sir, please just listen. She's in no condition for visitors right now."
"What happened?"
"There was an accident. A drunk driver hit her on the driver's side. Sir please just wait with Mr. Armstrong and we will get you when we've checked her."
I heard him say something obviously obscene in Italian and heard the door shut. I suddenly noticed the steady beeping of the heart machine next to the bed. Hit? By a drunk driver? It all suddenly came back to me. I opened my eyes and met the nurse's.
"Do you feel any pain?" she asked.
I couldn't speak. I could hardly open my eyes. My head was throbbing.
"Squeeze my hand- once for yes, two for no."
She gave me her hand. I squeezed it once.
"Is it your head?"
I squeezed once.
"There's a young man here named Luca Cambonelli. Do you wish to see him?"
I squeezed once.
She smiled and walked over to the door. "Be back in a minute."
Luca came in a few minutes later. His eyes were red and puffy.
"They say you nearly died. They called your mother and she called me," he said, sitting on the bed next to me.
"I nearly died?" I asked. I felt a wave of nausea sweep over me, but I held it back. I didn't wanna puke in front of Luca.
"Yes. While they were doing operation."
This didn't frighten me much since I had already had a brush with death once before. There was a knock at the door.
"Miss Stevens, Mr. Cambonelli, there's a man out here who wishes to speak with you."
"Who is it?" Luca asked.
"His name's Billie Joe."
I looked at Luca. "He'll wanna speak to me alone."
He smiled softly and nodded. He kissed me on the cheek and left the room. Billie came in and shut the door.
"I feel responsible," he said, sitting next to me on the bed. He also had been crying.
"Don't. I wasn't paying attention."
"Because you were thinking about what happened. What I did."
I didn't answer to that. He was absolutely right.
"I can't deal with this," he said.
"Don't think about it," I said, my head giving another nasty throb just thinking about it.
"I can't stop! That's just it. And look what it's done to you!" He laid his head in his hands.
I sighed and rubbed his back. "We've done this before and we got through it."
He stood up and kicked the bed hard. "YOU ALMOST FUCKING DIED!"
My head spun. I closed my eyes and tried not to throw up.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get mad." He knelt beside me and cupped my face.
"It's ok," I said softly.
"This is insane," he said, smiling with tears in his eyes.
Tears began to form in my eyes. "A little bit." I smiled back.
"I still love Adie."
"I know. Billie, if I weren't 16 years old, you would definitely be the one I would want to be with, but it's not right. And I don't know why this keeps happening to us, but you have to forget about all of this. Both of us do."
He laid his head on my shoulder. I ran my fingers through his hair. He looked back up.
"If I were a 16 year old boy I don't think I would ever let you go." He smiled.
This was scary. My head began to spin again. I felt everything begin to fall around me. The next thing I remember was hearing a doctor shout "Clear!" and felt a streak of heat fill my body. I jumped from shock.
"She's back! Check her vitals," he said, turning to his nurse.
My vision went blurry again for a moment. I felt sick.
"All normal." replied the nurse.
The doctor looked back down at me. "Can you hear me?" he asked.
I nodded.
"Then you are very lucky." He smiled. I closed my eyes and sighed. They finally cleared out of the room. I wasn't allowed to have visitors for a couple of days just in case. I was finally released two weeks later and was to be monitored on my eating. I had to have 3 actual meals and at least 2 snacks a day. I didn't want it. I just wasn't hungry. No matter what they did, I couldn't and wouldn't eat.
"You're gonna make yourself sick," Billie finally said on my 5th day home.
"I'm not hungry. I've told you five thousand times!" I said irritably. I closed my bedroom door and locked it.
"I'm serious! You're gonna regret it!" he yelled through the door.
"I'll eat when I feel like it!" I yelled back.
I got back in the studio within the next couple of weeks. It was so weird to be back. So many new songs were written while I was home I didn't know which ones to put on the record. We recorded for about 9 months before we finally finished. I was as pleased with this record as I was with the first. Billie was also pleased, but he was still very concerned about my eating habits. I was just never hungry. I did eat, but not like I was supposed to.
"I bet you haven't had 6 actual meals since your accident," he said, taking a drag off this cigarette after we left the studio the last day of recording.
"Well, like I have told you before- I eat when I'm hungry. I'm just not hungry like I used to be."
"You've got an eating disorder," Billie demanded.
"No, I just have weird eating habits. People have weird eating habits all around the world." I argued back.
"Whatever." He finally gave in.
The phone rang and he ran downstairs to get it. He came back moments later, banging on the door.
"Kayla! You've been nominated!"
"Huh?" I asked, opening the door. He threw his arms around me in a hug, nearly crushing my malnourished body.
"You've been nominated for a VMA!" he shouted again.
I stared in shock. "No way."
"Yeah! And they want you to play AND present an award!"
We celebrated for a moment and then I went to call my mom and tell her. The VMAs were coming up in about 1 month, so I had just enough time to get ready. I had to go practice at the stadium about one week before. I was pumped, but it didn't improve my eating habits and not 3 days before the VMA's, Billie was bitching again.
"You're gonna get up there and fall out if you don't pack it on fast."
"Maybe, but if I'm not hungry, I'm not eating. I'm just not hungry anymore. If I eat when I'm not hungry I get sick."
"Cuz you never eat!" he fought back. I was sick of hearing it. I should have listened...
