It Doesn't Remind Me of Anything, chapter 3

I walked down the stairs to hear someone in the kitchen, it must be Shannon. I just avoided her because I know she doesn't want to see me or talk to me right now.

'Maybe I should just go back to bed.' I thought. So I stretched and climbed the stairs and walked back into our bedroom to sleep for a couple more hours.
"Ugh. I can't sleep," I said to myself. I have this feeling in my stomach. I'm afraid to tell Amanda that I'm leaving.

<><>

It finally reached nine o'clock, the time Amanda usually wakes up. I got out of bed and slowly walked out of my bed room and cautiously walked down the stairs.
"OW," I yelled. I had stepped on one of Amanda's toys. Just then, Amanda turned around and saw me.
"Hi Daddy!" Before I knew it I was being smothered by my daughter with hugs.
"Hey, Pandie." I was trying to get to the kitchen, but I found it hard seeing that Amanda was now attached to my left leg and wouldn't let go. When I walked into the kitchen, Shannon was sitting at our little table, perfect for the three of us, eating a bowl of cereal. Cocoa Pebbles to be exact. She didn't look up at me, which I was thankful for. I didn't want to look her in the eye.
"Hi Mommy!" Amanda waved, just like she did to me when she saw me earlier.
"Good morning, sweetie," Shannon simply said, still not looking up from her bowl of cereal. Amanda let go of my leg and ran over to her mother and opened her mouth, expecting Shannon to give her some cereal. Shannon smiled and gave Amanda some cereal. After Amanda got what she wanted, she happily skipped out of the kitchen singing some "do do de da's" . After she left the room, Shannon looked up at me with red eyes and a tear-stained face. I suddenly felt a rush of guilt come over me.
"When are you going to tell her?" I sighed.
"Soon," Shannon went back to eating her cereal, not wanting to say any more.

I walked out of the kitchen and walked up the stairs, into the bed room to get ready to leave. As I put my final belongings into my bag, I looked around our room and stared at the variety of pictures hanging on the wall. There was one of Me, Shannon, Billie, and Mike after we played our first gig together at Gilman. Then I came across a picture of Shannon, Amanda, and I on a boat on Amanda's first birthday. Our faces were covered with cake and chocolate frosting. That was a great day, especially because Shannon fell off of the boat. And then I saw a picture of Shannon and I in the hospital the day Amanda was born. I loved that picture the most because I was wearing those cool doctor costume things, and Shannon looked so happy with Amanda in her arms. And I had my goofy smile, telling everyone I was one happy man.

I traced the photos with my eyes one more time before I gathered all of my bags and headed downstairs.

"What am I doing?"