My happy endings (A My Chemical Romance story), chapter 5
The guys put down there coffee cups. Gerard and the guys walked up onto the 'stage'. Gerard took mid stage position in front of a microphone. He was lead vocals. They began to play.
"When I was,
A young boy,
My father, took me into the city
To see a marching band
He said "son when, you grow up, will you be, the savior of the broken, the beaten and the damned."
He said "will you defeat them, your demons, and all the non-believers, the plans that they have made, Because one day, I'll leave you, a phantom, to lead you in the summer, to join the black parade."
When I was,
A young boy
My father, took me into the city
To see a marching band
He said "son when, you grow up, will you be, the savior of the broken, the beaten and the damned."
Sometimes I get the feeling, she's watching over me
And other times I feel like I should go
When through it all, the rise and fall
The bodies in the street
And when you're gone we want you all to know
We'll carry on, We'll carry on
And though you say you don't believe
Your memory will carry on
We'll carry on
Until my heart I can't contain it
The anthem won't explain it
And we will send you reeling from decimated dreams
You're misery and hate will kill us all
So paint it black and take it back
Lets shout it loud and clear
To fight it to the end we hear the call
To carry on
We'll carry on,
And though your dead and gone believe me
Your memory will carry on
We'll carry on
And though your broken and defeated
Your weary widow marches on
And on we carry through the fears
Oh oh oh
Here's the poignant faces of your piers
Oh oh oh
Take a look at me 'cause I could not care at all
Do or die
You'll never make me
'cause the world, will never take my (heart)
You can try; you'll never break me
You want it all, I'm gonna play this (part)
Won't explain, or say I'm sorry
I'm not ashamed, I'm gonna show my (scar)
You're the chair, for all the broken
Lose it here, because it's too me
I'm just a man; I'm not a hero
Just a boy, whose meant to sing this (song)
I'm just a man; I'm not a hero
I
Don't
Care
We'll carry on
We'll carry on
And though you're dead and gone believe me
Your memory will carry on
We'll carry on
And though your broken and defeated
Your weary widow marches on
(Do or die
You'll never make me
'Cause the world, will never take my (heart)
You can try; you'll never break me
You want it all, I'm gonna play this (part)
Won't explain, or say I'm sorry
I'm not ashamed, I'm gonna show my (scar)
You're the chair, for all the broken
Lose it here, because it's too me
I'm just a man; I'm not a hero
Just a boy, whose meant to sing this (song)
I'm just a man; I'm not a hero)
We'll carry on
We'll carry on
We'll carry on
We'll carry on
We'll carry on"
The song ended. Tears had formed in my eyes. It was about afterlife. The song had triggered other memories that I could not handle.
"That's great." I said as I ran upstairs to my room crying.
"Someone should go and see if she's okay." Mikey said.
Gerard gave them a worried look and suddenly ran upstairs to Steph's room.
I looked up to see the handle of the door in my room turn. A worried looking Gerard came strolling into the room and sat on the bed beside me. I felt his arm around my waist as he pulled me into a hug. I rested my head on his shoulder.
"Sorry, we should have thought about what we should show you at the moment." Gerard whispered to me.
"Don't worry Gerard. You don't need to watch what you do or say around me. I need to get over it," I sobbed.
"Well, what we did is going to make it worse."
"You didn't do anything."
Gerard pulled me into a tighter hug.
"I think Frank, Bob and Ray will have to know what happened soon. They could help you." Gerard said.
I let out a sigh.
"Your right."
"I know this is difficult but remember I'm here for you, what ever happens. You can tell me anything."
"I'll remember."
"And, when you tell the other three guys they'll get an idea of what your going through and they'll be for you too. They helped so much when I went through depression."
I began to cry a lot. I realized that Gerard was right. I have to tell them about this and he's there for me.
"I don't want to seem center of attention. I feel like everything is evolving around me and my problems come first and people have to work there lives the way I want it. Thats wrong."
"Its not. Everything will be back to normal when you've settle in and when your not depressed. It'd take time and you'll probably feel like everyone, the world, is against you but there fighting for you."
"I don't know what I'd do without you."
Gerards hand gently stroked my side for comfort.
We stayed hugging for about 5 minutes. We decided that I should calm down before I told them. After a while Gerard and I ambled down the stairs together where we found that the four guys had raided the cupboards. Gerard and I pretended that we never noticed and we sat down on the couch. Gerard grabbed my and to give me a sign he was there.
"Frank, Bob and Ray. I have something to tell you." I said looking at my feet, "I witnessed my parents murder and didn't do anything. I watched them die. I just froze. The murder was never caught and the police isn't doing anything. They sent me to a orphanage - which I was too old for. There they beat me and burnt the memories I had in front of me. I only have one photo album left which is only half full. Thats why all this is happening and why I'm here."
They looked at me speechless until finally Frank spoke.
"Your parents should have a funeral of some sort." Frank spoke.
Everyone else smiled.
"If we do you guys will have to go. I remember one night a few years ago, they said to me that if they ever died and I was sent of to an orphanage of some sort, who ever looked after me, they wanted them to go to the funeral so they could meet them."
"Okay." Gerard nodded.
Mikey came over and gave me a tight hug. After Frank, Bob and Ray followed.
"Do you want a drink or something?" Gerard asked me.
"Yeah. I'll go get it." I said getting up.
"No, I'll come with you." Gerard said.
We both headed into the kitchen.
"What you want?" Gerard asked.
"Just water." I replied.
Gerard began get me some water.
"I want to say thanks Gerard. I feel better now I've told them. I don't know why. I know I'm still not over the problem but I'm going to try."
Gerard handed me the water, "Well done" Gerard said as I wrapped my arms around his necks and his around my waist.
I put my head on Gerards chest and listened to the steady heartbeat.
"Do you want to go sit down?" Gerard asked.
"Sure," I said as Gerard linked his fingers with mine.
"When I was,
A young boy,
My father, took me into the city
To see a marching band
He said "son when, you grow up, will you be, the savior of the broken, the beaten and the damned."
He said "will you defeat them, your demons, and all the non-believers, the plans that they have made, Because one day, I'll leave you, a phantom, to lead you in the summer, to join the black parade."
When I was,
A young boy
My father, took me into the city
To see a marching band
He said "son when, you grow up, will you be, the savior of the broken, the beaten and the damned."
Sometimes I get the feeling, she's watching over me
And other times I feel like I should go
When through it all, the rise and fall
The bodies in the street
And when you're gone we want you all to know
We'll carry on, We'll carry on
And though you say you don't believe
Your memory will carry on
We'll carry on
Until my heart I can't contain it
The anthem won't explain it
And we will send you reeling from decimated dreams
You're misery and hate will kill us all
So paint it black and take it back
Lets shout it loud and clear
To fight it to the end we hear the call
To carry on
We'll carry on,
And though your dead and gone believe me
Your memory will carry on
We'll carry on
And though your broken and defeated
Your weary widow marches on
And on we carry through the fears
Oh oh oh
Here's the poignant faces of your piers
Oh oh oh
Take a look at me 'cause I could not care at all
Do or die
You'll never make me
'cause the world, will never take my (heart)
You can try; you'll never break me
You want it all, I'm gonna play this (part)
Won't explain, or say I'm sorry
I'm not ashamed, I'm gonna show my (scar)
You're the chair, for all the broken
Lose it here, because it's too me
I'm just a man; I'm not a hero
Just a boy, whose meant to sing this (song)
I'm just a man; I'm not a hero
I
Don't
Care
We'll carry on
We'll carry on
And though you're dead and gone believe me
Your memory will carry on
We'll carry on
And though your broken and defeated
Your weary widow marches on
(Do or die
You'll never make me
'Cause the world, will never take my (heart)
You can try; you'll never break me
You want it all, I'm gonna play this (part)
Won't explain, or say I'm sorry
I'm not ashamed, I'm gonna show my (scar)
You're the chair, for all the broken
Lose it here, because it's too me
I'm just a man; I'm not a hero
Just a boy, whose meant to sing this (song)
I'm just a man; I'm not a hero)
We'll carry on
We'll carry on
We'll carry on
We'll carry on
We'll carry on"
The song ended. Tears had formed in my eyes. It was about afterlife. The song had triggered other memories that I could not handle.
"That's great." I said as I ran upstairs to my room crying.
"Someone should go and see if she's okay." Mikey said.
Gerard gave them a worried look and suddenly ran upstairs to Steph's room.
I looked up to see the handle of the door in my room turn. A worried looking Gerard came strolling into the room and sat on the bed beside me. I felt his arm around my waist as he pulled me into a hug. I rested my head on his shoulder.
"Sorry, we should have thought about what we should show you at the moment." Gerard whispered to me.
"Don't worry Gerard. You don't need to watch what you do or say around me. I need to get over it," I sobbed.
"Well, what we did is going to make it worse."
"You didn't do anything."
Gerard pulled me into a tighter hug.
"I think Frank, Bob and Ray will have to know what happened soon. They could help you." Gerard said.
I let out a sigh.
"Your right."
"I know this is difficult but remember I'm here for you, what ever happens. You can tell me anything."
"I'll remember."
"And, when you tell the other three guys they'll get an idea of what your going through and they'll be for you too. They helped so much when I went through depression."
I began to cry a lot. I realized that Gerard was right. I have to tell them about this and he's there for me.
"I don't want to seem center of attention. I feel like everything is evolving around me and my problems come first and people have to work there lives the way I want it. Thats wrong."
"Its not. Everything will be back to normal when you've settle in and when your not depressed. It'd take time and you'll probably feel like everyone, the world, is against you but there fighting for you."
"I don't know what I'd do without you."
Gerards hand gently stroked my side for comfort.
We stayed hugging for about 5 minutes. We decided that I should calm down before I told them. After a while Gerard and I ambled down the stairs together where we found that the four guys had raided the cupboards. Gerard and I pretended that we never noticed and we sat down on the couch. Gerard grabbed my and to give me a sign he was there.
"Frank, Bob and Ray. I have something to tell you." I said looking at my feet, "I witnessed my parents murder and didn't do anything. I watched them die. I just froze. The murder was never caught and the police isn't doing anything. They sent me to a orphanage - which I was too old for. There they beat me and burnt the memories I had in front of me. I only have one photo album left which is only half full. Thats why all this is happening and why I'm here."
They looked at me speechless until finally Frank spoke.
"Your parents should have a funeral of some sort." Frank spoke.
Everyone else smiled.
"If we do you guys will have to go. I remember one night a few years ago, they said to me that if they ever died and I was sent of to an orphanage of some sort, who ever looked after me, they wanted them to go to the funeral so they could meet them."
"Okay." Gerard nodded.
Mikey came over and gave me a tight hug. After Frank, Bob and Ray followed.
"Do you want a drink or something?" Gerard asked me.
"Yeah. I'll go get it." I said getting up.
"No, I'll come with you." Gerard said.
We both headed into the kitchen.
"What you want?" Gerard asked.
"Just water." I replied.
Gerard began get me some water.
"I want to say thanks Gerard. I feel better now I've told them. I don't know why. I know I'm still not over the problem but I'm going to try."
Gerard handed me the water, "Well done" Gerard said as I wrapped my arms around his necks and his around my waist.
I put my head on Gerards chest and listened to the steady heartbeat.
"Do you want to go sit down?" Gerard asked.
"Sure," I said as Gerard linked his fingers with mine.
