Remember When, chapter 3

Somewhere between the winter months of our sophomore year of high school, Tre just stopped coming to school. At first he would miss a day here and a day there, but then he stopped coming altogether, his parents and the school counselors eventually giving up their pursuit to regain his interest in academic life. It had always been an uphill battle, but now combine the factor of him always wanting to practice with his band and you have a very, very uncooperative sixteen-year-old Tre who smoked a lot and liked to rattle his Mom's nerves.

I stared blankly at the desk next to me through most of English class one particular November morning, amused as I pictured him at home sleeping until late afternoon, and bored all the same because there was no one there to fight off as they tried to draw on my new jeans with marker.

After school, like usual, I trudged up the hill past my house en route to Tre's. I knocked once before letting myself in, shedding my snowy boots and bulky jacket at the door. After greeting Tre's Dad I wandered through the warm kitchen and down the hall to where Tre's room was. At the door I covered my eyes like I always did before entering, learning that knocking sometimes wasn't enough notice for Tre, and found that it was just easiest not to look whenever entering his room.

On the other side, when I didn't hear a greeting or any other alarming noises, I lowered my hand. I immediately grinned as I surveyed his unconscious form, slumped over on his bed, a still lit cigarette dangling dangerously between his fingers.

"Geez Tre," I mumble to myself, easing over the floorboards and quickly plucking the cigarette from his fingers. He stirred a little, cracking an eyelid as I distinguished the fire hazard and shoved the ashtray back under his bed.
"Hey Moe," Tre mumbles to me, his childhood nickname for me bringing a small smile to my lips.

Ever since he had found out my initials spelled MOE, Marin Olivia Emerson apparently too formal for him, he had been more than willing to refer to me as such. It had been a long time since I had heard this though, and in a way I was glad to be outgrowing it.

Crawling up next to him, I smirk at his dazed expression. "You fell asleep smoking...that's a new level of lazy. You should feel proud."
He shrugs, his head surrendering back to his pillow as he yawns. "What did I miss in school today?" He asks, changing the subject quickly, even though I knew he didn't even care to know.
"An algebra test, a pop quiz in history...." I trail off as he grins up at me, making my stomach flip-flop.

Feeling like this, and wanting to share these feeling with Tre, was still pretty new to me, to us. It had only been a few months since Tre had pretty much lunged at me one night while we were swimming, his nose awkwardly bumping mine as he basically missed my mouth and landed a kiss on my jaw. But that was Tre, he was unpoetic and sudden about everything, and yet he still always managed to make me grin stupidly back at him, similar to how I was smiling right then.

"So I missed nothing then?" He surmised, fingers stretching to link almost shyly through mine. His eyes were still a little glazed over with sleep and a boredom we had become accustomed to as soon as playing outside and climbing trees had lost its appeal.
"Yeah, well...you weren't there to entertain me," I reply with a fake pout, noting the way his lips hooked up in a smile on the right side of his face. "Without you I actually have to pay attention this year."

As he yanks me by my arm, I move closer, settling against his side as we both lie back against the pillow. "I keep telling you that you should just start skipping with me," He murmurs playfully. "That way we're both entertained."
"My Dad would kill me." I yawned, snuggling closer to the sweater he was wearing.
"Then let's just run away Mare," He droned in my ear, his soft words making me feel sleepy now that I had my own personal heat source to cuddle up to. "We can make our own adventure."

There was something intoxicating about Tre, something in him you immediately wanted to trust. I closed my eyes, ignoring the faint smell of smoke, and instead drinking in the comfort of his room, a room I had practically grown up in.

"Maybe someday..." I murmured back.

I was safe here. I would always be safe with him.


When we woke hours later it was long passed dark outside. "Shit," I grumble, wiping at my eyes. "My parents are going to be so pissed that I didn't make it home before dinner, or that I didn't even call them."

Tre hugs me closer, rolling towards me as I try to sit up. "You're already late, you might as well stay." This was his logic for everything. He'd been saying it for years now. "They know you're with me anyway."

I grin at him as he leans forward, pressing his lips to mine. Our reactions were dulled from the nap we took but I immediately gave in to him, relaxing back against the pillow and welcoming the sensations that always accompanied being this close to him. His skin was soft, his motions slow as the pace of the kiss gradually began to pick up, my palm making its way into his hair.

I knew from experience it didn't take much to get Tre really worked up, and I knew before that happened I had to go home. Pushing at his chest I giggle when he makes a disagreeing noise in the back of his throat. The hand resting on my hip presses me harder against the mattress, as if hoping this one was gesture will be enough to keep me here.

"I have to go home..." I whisper in his ear as he nuzzles his lips against my shoulder.
"Stay," He argues, almost in full pout mode now. I had been listening to this boy pout for years now, it was almost like his second language. His first language being hyper active.

Tre mumbles something back I can't quit understand, which makes me chuckle. I manage to gently push him away as I sit up. "You can come over later you know."
Tre nods, moving to sit up next to me as I straighten my hair and wipe the remaining sleep from my eyes. "And we can stay up late tonight cos tomorrow is Saturday," He adds.

Grinning, I nudge my shoulder into his. "Every day is like Saturday to you," I tease. "You lazy ass."
He smiles back, leaning down to readjust his socks as they had both managed to twist the wrong way around his ankle. "I'll come by around 11," He finally says, hand resting absentmindedly on my thigh as I tie my hair back into a sloppy ponytail.

I nod, leaning to kiss him briefly once again. Luckily our kiss couldn't get much more out of hand because we both heard the familiar sound of Tre's Mom coming down the hallway. We both pulled apart just as she lightly knocked once and stuck her head through the doorframe.

"Hey kids," She greets us. "Sorry to interrupt, but Marin, your Dad called."
I nod, glancing knowingly at Tre before standing up and walking towards the door. "He wants me home?" I confirm as she nods. This was how it usually went in the evenings. I stayed too long at Tre's, my Dad called over to find me and then I went home and did homework until later when Tre would sneak through my window.

"Bye!" I called to both Tre and his Mom before grabbing my coat and backpack and starting for home. It was colder than usual outside, the November wind cutting across my cheeks. I glanced back at Tre's house once, wishing I could stay. I loved being there, I loved his family, they way they interacted and moved peacefully around the house. His Mom, Margaret, or Maggie for short, was always baking or working outside in her garden, and with Tre being the youngest and the last at home, that meant he got most of her attention too.

Maggie never seemed to mind Tre and I spending long hours alone in his bedroom, for one reason or another she trusted us. I guess because we had spent so much time together as children, she just figured she would let nature takes its course. Plus, she also knew I had more self-control in my pinkie finger than Tre did in his whole body. On that principle alone she trusted us and until we gave her reason to feel otherwise, we had a serious lack of supervision. Unlike my house where my Dad all but pulled out the ruler and made us sit twelve inches apart on the couch. I knew he cared, but it was nice being away from prying eyes once in a while.

Finally at home I sigh a little, pushing through the front door and unloading my stuff in the kitchen. My Dad was at the table, looking over papers, his glasses sitting rather low on his nose.

"Hi Marin," He calls, looking and sounding stressed as usual.
"Hey Dad, sorry about dinner," I apologize, plopping down across from him.

He glances up, giving me a controlled smile. "I assume you and Tre were doing homework?"
I give him a sheepish grin. "Absolutely. We did our history homework together."

He smirks knowingly before shaking his head. "Yeah, I bet." I grin as he continues, "I actually called you home because your brother needs help with his math homework and he insists he will only accept it from you."
I nod. "I suppose I could do that." And the loaded question. "Where's Mom?"
"Sleeping."

Resisting the urge to roll my eyes I instead decide to go look for Graham. "I'm going to go help Graham and then I'll probably go to bed. Night."
"Night Marin," He murmurs distractedly as I pick up my bag from by the front door.

After depositing my stuff in my room I head across the hall, gently pushing at my brother's door. He looked up from where he was sitting on the floor, small toy trucks in hand.
"You're late tonight," He accuses in a manner that only a nine-year-old can pull off.

I smile at him, noting that he was the only one in this family who could truly make me feel guilty for my absence lately. "Dad said you wanted help with your math," I say, avoiding his accusation.
He nods, pulling a piece of paper out of a folder on his right and handing it to me. "It's multiplication."

"Multiplication? Yuck," I joke, reaching for a pencil and something to write on as he climbs into my lap. We sat on the floor working through problems for a while until he started to get sleepy. I put away his math homework as he quickly changed into his pajamas and climbed under the covers.

As I tuck him in he motions for me to sit, and I do. "What?" I ask. "Want me to go get Dad so he can say goodnight?"
Graham shakes his head, voice dropping to almost a whisper. "What's wrong with Mommy?" He asks, eyelashes gliding innocently over his cheeks as he awaits an answer.

I frown before I can stop myself. I knew eventually he would start asking questions, the excuse of Mom sleeping a lot because of a headache or because she didn't feel well unable to fool Graham anymore. "Well..." I start, trailing off. "Mommy is sick a lot so she likes to sleep because that makes her feel better."

This doesn't really seem to appease him as his lips twist thoughtfully. "But...but how come she only feels bad on some days?"
That was something we all would like to know. "Sometimes her medicine doesn't work," I offer, running my fingers through his bangs. "But there's nothing for you to worry about, okay? Mommy loves you and she's trying to get better so she can run outside with you more and help you with your homework when you need it."

The words seem cheap to me but they make Graham happy and that's all that matters. "Okay Marin," He finally says, gracing me with that smile that I loved so much. "I'll see you in the morning."
"Sweet dreams Grammers," I mumble, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek.

On the way out of his bedroom I turned on his nightlight and shut his door only halfway. I notice my Dad still working away so I tell him goodnight again and drag myself into my own bedroom where I strip down and crawl into bed.

It was still early yet, only after 9, and I was already wishing Tre was here to talk to. I lie awake for a while, thinking about random stuff until I heard my Dad go to bed. I could feel myself dozing off when suddenly I heard my window rattle and the sound of wood sliding up the frame. A gust of frigid air came rushing into my room as Tre slid one leg in and then the other.

"Hey," He whispers to me, quietly shutting the window. "I've been waiting for the kitchen light to go off for hours." Besides playing the drums, sneaking in and out of somewhere without being caught was the only graceful thing he could do.

I giggle as he kicks off his snowy shoes and quickly traipses over to lock my bedroom door, something I had apparently forgotten to do. After shedding his coat he climbs over me and plops down closest to the wall. We had learned a long time ago that Tre facing away from the wall I shared with my parents made the most sense, as his voice tended to carry when he got overly excited about something.

His fingertips felt cold against my skin but his lips were warm and his arms were inviting. "You look sad," He whispers in my ear as he begins to warm up, his shivers residing.
"Graham asked me tonight what's wrong with Mom," I whispered back. "I didn't really know what to say."

Tre frowns, moving a little closer to nuzzle his nose against mine. "Don't think about it Marin, not tonight. There's nothing you can do about it anyway."
"But Tre, I-"
He silences me with a determined kiss, hand moving to cup my jaw as he inches closer yet again. 'Distract yourself physically', this was another notion he liked to apply to everything. It always seemed to cheer up him anyway.

Although I did have to admit that focusing on his tongue working against mine, as opposed to thinking about my Mother, really was more appealing. As predicted, things quickly got out of hand, our breath becoming ragged as we tried to get a grip on the situation...amongst other things.

Truth of the matter was that Tre and I had yet to sleep together, but that didn't mean that we weren't thinking about it. And that certainly didn't mean that we weren't steadily progressing in that direction every time hands wandered under shirts or tugged at belts.

Tre was extremely patient given his ongoing state of 'being repressed', as he put it. Usually after a good make out session like the one we just had, he would casually disappear into the bathroom for a few moments, returning later with a smile and offering to cuddle until we fell asleep. Staying at my house sort of put a cramp in his style as he couldn't just get up and use the bathroom. We just couldn't run that risk of being seen.

Deciding enough was enough, we separated and prepared to go to sleep. I bit my lip as we both settled back against the sheets, trying not to laugh as he winced uncomfortably. Tre exhaled, closing his eyes and tucking his hands behind his head, inviting me to cuddle into his side. I do, resting my cheek against his chest and fighting off a comment.

"What are you smiling about?" He whispers, chest rumbling with his question.
I grin wider. "Nothing...I was just thinking about what you said a few minutes ago, and about how you could apply those words to your current, uh, predicament."

I don't have to look to see the obvious confusion on his face. "What did I say?"
"You said not to worry about it tonight because there's nothing you can do about it anyway...I just thought it was quite ironic..." I trail off, pressing my hand to my mouth to suppress the giggles as he lifts the sheet up to examine the front of his pants.

"I suppose you're right," He whispers back, causing me to laugh harder. "Although I don't think it's fair you're laughing at me considering you're the one who did this to me."

Our giggling fell silent when we heard footsteps in the hallway, signaling that someone was awake and wandering around. Tre sat up and quietly leaned over me, tucking his shoes and jacket under my bed. Once during the summer he had to hide in my closet because Graham woke up from a bad dream and wanted to sleep with me. Tre had spent many miserable hours folded awkwardly into the small space until morning when Graham woke up and went back to his room. I hoped we weren't going to have a repeat performance of that tonight.

Because of the heavy thud with every step, I assumed it wasn't Graham, which meant it was probably my Dad. I tensed in Tre's arms when it sounded like the person had stopped right outside my door, probably listening for voices. I knew my Dad probably had a good idea that Tre came over 'uninvited' sometimes, but if he knew the amount of times he frequented sleeping in my bed at night he would probably sell the house and move us back to North Carolina. Just from the things he said sometimes I was quite aware that Tre and I spending so much time together was quickly grating on his nerves.

Eventually, we were able to breathe normally again when the footsteps resided back into my parent's bedroom. We laid silently for over ten minutes so as not to raise any more suspicions, and then finally, we kissed once more before snuggling deeper into the blankets

"Close call," He barely whispers against my ear as I nod.

I didn't dare speak. The thought of not having Tre in my life like I did was enough to scare me into the necessary silence we needed for the rest of the night.

"I'll see you in your dreams Marin," Tre whispers again, pressing a kiss to my temple. "We're always safe there."

I nod, squeezing him closer as I wrap my arms around his waist. He was just too precious to lose.