Jackass, chapter 1
It was true, she had been out with a ton of celebrity guys. Maybe even a few girls, that would have been hot. She is awesome, hot, funny, and wonderful. She's on the show Jackass, Davey Hatcher. I have been crushing on her since the first time she was on Jackass; she was going out with Johnny Knoxville at the time. They had broke up since. She's been out with a lot of guys, I wish I could have been one of those guys. Actually at the moment I was getting ready to watch Jackass.
The warning thingy came on, this always made me chuckle.
"Hey," it was her. "I'm Davey Hatecher, and this is Jackass," she announced and she used a slingshot to pelt some rocks into Johnny Knoxvillie balls. I laughed me ass off.
Claudia walked into the room.
"What are you watching?" she asked.
"Jackass," I replied laughing again.
"I should have known," she replied and rolled her eyes.
Yes, I still lived with my ex-wife, it was only to raise my son. We had gotten divorced a little over 3 years ago in 2003. Now, being 2006, I was glad to be home. Me and the guys were on a small recording break for about 3 weeks. We had been working like mad lately. Plus, I was busy watching the new season of Jackass.I watched Davey do some crazy shit with Steve-O and Wee Man.
Today on the show she was wearing a Green Day t-shirt and tight bondage pants from Hot Topic. Fuck did she look like a babe. Green Day was actually one of her favorite bands, I was flattered.
She said her goal was to meet us. But I do look for her at parties and she's usually snogging some guy. I saw her giving head to Johnny once at a party when they were still going out. Johnny was drunk as hell, and he was having a great time. They were just there in the middle a smoke filled room and Johnny was sitting on the couch and Davey was on her knees giving him a BJ. She seemed like the kind of girl for me.
When Jackass had ended I went out to go get the mail. Just bills and whatnot. But there was a black envelope with my name addressed on it. It looked like an invitation to me. I opened it and it said on it:
You're invited Ass monkey!
To the premiere of Jackass II!
I stared at the piece of paper for a moment.
"Oh my god!" I said rather loudly quite excitedly.
Claudia came into the kitchen after I had expressed my excitement.
"What?" she asked.
"I got invited to the premiere of Jackass II!" I replied happily.
"Great, how did you get the invite though?" she asked.
"Dunno. But who cares! I got invited! YES!" I exclaimed happily.
"Well, cool," she replied.
I walked back through the living room and up the stairs to go put the invitation in my bedroom. I was putting it up in my underwear drawer when Claudia appeared at my door frame.
"So when is this thing?" she asked.
"Next Friday," I replied.
There were a few seconds of silence.
"So...who are you going to take?" she asked.
"Huh?" I asked looking up at her.
"Who are you going to take with you as a date to the premiere?" she repeated.
"Oh, no one," I replied.
"Oh, no?" she questioned.
"Yeah, I'm hoping to go alone and wind up with Miss Davey Hatch her herself," I replied with a grin.
The warning thingy came on, this always made me chuckle.
"Hey," it was her. "I'm Davey Hatecher, and this is Jackass," she announced and she used a slingshot to pelt some rocks into Johnny Knoxvillie balls. I laughed me ass off.
Claudia walked into the room.
"What are you watching?" she asked.
"Jackass," I replied laughing again.
"I should have known," she replied and rolled her eyes.
Yes, I still lived with my ex-wife, it was only to raise my son. We had gotten divorced a little over 3 years ago in 2003. Now, being 2006, I was glad to be home. Me and the guys were on a small recording break for about 3 weeks. We had been working like mad lately. Plus, I was busy watching the new season of Jackass.I watched Davey do some crazy shit with Steve-O and Wee Man.
Today on the show she was wearing a Green Day t-shirt and tight bondage pants from Hot Topic. Fuck did she look like a babe. Green Day was actually one of her favorite bands, I was flattered.
She said her goal was to meet us. But I do look for her at parties and she's usually snogging some guy. I saw her giving head to Johnny once at a party when they were still going out. Johnny was drunk as hell, and he was having a great time. They were just there in the middle a smoke filled room and Johnny was sitting on the couch and Davey was on her knees giving him a BJ. She seemed like the kind of girl for me.
When Jackass had ended I went out to go get the mail. Just bills and whatnot. But there was a black envelope with my name addressed on it. It looked like an invitation to me. I opened it and it said on it:
You're invited Ass monkey!
To the premiere of Jackass II!
I stared at the piece of paper for a moment.
"Oh my god!" I said rather loudly quite excitedly.
Claudia came into the kitchen after I had expressed my excitement.
"What?" she asked.
"I got invited to the premiere of Jackass II!" I replied happily.
"Great, how did you get the invite though?" she asked.
"Dunno. But who cares! I got invited! YES!" I exclaimed happily.
"Well, cool," she replied.
I walked back through the living room and up the stairs to go put the invitation in my bedroom. I was putting it up in my underwear drawer when Claudia appeared at my door frame.
"So when is this thing?" she asked.
"Next Friday," I replied.
There were a few seconds of silence.
"So...who are you going to take?" she asked.
"Huh?" I asked looking up at her.
"Who are you going to take with you as a date to the premiere?" she repeated.
"Oh, no one," I replied.
"Oh, no?" she questioned.
"Yeah, I'm hoping to go alone and wind up with Miss Davey Hatch her herself," I replied with a grin.
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