Untitled, chapter 5
Seeing as people knew that me and Billie were on bad terms towards the end they began to think that the baby was a result of a one night stand, and that's the way I wanted it. For some strange reason, that to this day I still can't understand, I didn't want him to know.
Because my pregnancy was running smoothly this time, we decided to return to the studio and work on the second album which we were going to quite aptly call Deception. It was just me and Tanya in the studio mucking about.
"Billie's the father isn't he," she stated out of the blue.
"What?! How do you come to that conclusion?" I asked her panicking.
"I'm not stupid - you should really tell him you know."
"I'm not going to and I have my reasons so don't bother trying to get me to change my mind, your not going to tell anyone are you? I mean I guess it wouldn't be so bad if Ben, Matt and Eccy knew they probs know already."
"Yeah they do we were talking about it and I won't tell anyone,"
"Thanks so you talk about me behind my back do ya? Nah it's cool - hey listen I'm going for my 6 month scan tomorrow do you want to come? I could kinda use the morals support seeing as mum's disowned me in a way."
"Yeah sure, hey can they find out if it's a boy or girl at 6 months do ya reckon, and if they can are you going to?"
"Yeah I think they can, and it would probably make things easier like buying everything that it will need and decorating its room."
We stopped talking about babies then because the guys came back from Subway with food, woohoo, and then we recorded some more.
***
I was going for my scan today at midday so me and Tanya decided to go on a shopping spree, we never knew there was going to be paparazzi though. I decided just to ignore them and enjoy whatever free time I had left before the baby. I bought some maternity wear and there was a sale at Qube (a shoe store) and I have a major thing about shoes so I bought like 5 pairs.
I hate hospitals, I always have, and they smell funky. So I was sitting on the bed with a monitor beside me and Tanya on the other side and the nurse came in and put this jelly on my stomach and moved the ultrasound probe thingy over me, all of this I was cool with it was standard procedure, what happened next I was not ready for.
"So can you tell the sex at this age?" I asked.
"Oh yeah, do you want the sex for both?" she asked.
"What do you mean both?" Tanya asked.
"Oh my god are you trying to tell me that I'm having twins?!"
"Yeah you are didn't they tell you at your first scan?"
"No they never." I replied extremely angrily.
"Oh well I'm very sorry, from what I can see your having twin girls congratulations!"
After I got over my shock I went home to tell, Ben, Matt and Eccy. If I thought I was shocked that was nothing compared to how they were! But said that they would support me.
***
It was February in 1998; I was 7 months gone and felt like a whale. Deception was finished, but seeing as I was 7 months pregnant we weren't touring to promote it, we were only doing radio interviews over the phone and magazine interviews without recent pictures incase Billie saw me and added 2+2, and instead of getting 5 like I would hope he would get 4.
The first single off of the album was released on the 21st of Feb and the album was out 2 weeks after. After another stupid radio interview we went shopping for baby necessities leaving the boys to decorate our spare room, we had to buy everything and ran up a huge bill, thank god my dad hasn't disowned me, he paid for everything.
***
On the 11th of March 1998 I gave birth to my beautiful twin girls by caesarean section. I named them Sydney and Riley, I know, I know they are boy's names but they are sweet.
They grew up fast, looking back I realised how selfish I was not letting him know about them but I did make a sort of scrap book of everything - I wrote everything down and had loads of pictures incase I ever built up the courage to tell him. They are identical in everyway looks wise and only people who have known them their own life can tell them apart, but in personality they couldn't be more different - Sydney is very girly but like her parents prefers rock to hip hop, whereas Riley is a total rock chick and loves punk, they both love Green Day, and I'm always worried in case they realise their resemblance to him, (they have his eyes and hair colour).
When the girls where 8 we were only on our 4th album (we took a break) and I bought my own house. That we've lived in 'til this day.
Because my pregnancy was running smoothly this time, we decided to return to the studio and work on the second album which we were going to quite aptly call Deception. It was just me and Tanya in the studio mucking about.
"Billie's the father isn't he," she stated out of the blue.
"What?! How do you come to that conclusion?" I asked her panicking.
"I'm not stupid - you should really tell him you know."
"I'm not going to and I have my reasons so don't bother trying to get me to change my mind, your not going to tell anyone are you? I mean I guess it wouldn't be so bad if Ben, Matt and Eccy knew they probs know already."
"Yeah they do we were talking about it and I won't tell anyone,"
"Thanks so you talk about me behind my back do ya? Nah it's cool - hey listen I'm going for my 6 month scan tomorrow do you want to come? I could kinda use the morals support seeing as mum's disowned me in a way."
"Yeah sure, hey can they find out if it's a boy or girl at 6 months do ya reckon, and if they can are you going to?"
"Yeah I think they can, and it would probably make things easier like buying everything that it will need and decorating its room."
We stopped talking about babies then because the guys came back from Subway with food, woohoo, and then we recorded some more.
***
I was going for my scan today at midday so me and Tanya decided to go on a shopping spree, we never knew there was going to be paparazzi though. I decided just to ignore them and enjoy whatever free time I had left before the baby. I bought some maternity wear and there was a sale at Qube (a shoe store) and I have a major thing about shoes so I bought like 5 pairs.
I hate hospitals, I always have, and they smell funky. So I was sitting on the bed with a monitor beside me and Tanya on the other side and the nurse came in and put this jelly on my stomach and moved the ultrasound probe thingy over me, all of this I was cool with it was standard procedure, what happened next I was not ready for.
"So can you tell the sex at this age?" I asked.
"Oh yeah, do you want the sex for both?" she asked.
"What do you mean both?" Tanya asked.
"Oh my god are you trying to tell me that I'm having twins?!"
"Yeah you are didn't they tell you at your first scan?"
"No they never." I replied extremely angrily.
"Oh well I'm very sorry, from what I can see your having twin girls congratulations!"
After I got over my shock I went home to tell, Ben, Matt and Eccy. If I thought I was shocked that was nothing compared to how they were! But said that they would support me.
***
It was February in 1998; I was 7 months gone and felt like a whale. Deception was finished, but seeing as I was 7 months pregnant we weren't touring to promote it, we were only doing radio interviews over the phone and magazine interviews without recent pictures incase Billie saw me and added 2+2, and instead of getting 5 like I would hope he would get 4.
The first single off of the album was released on the 21st of Feb and the album was out 2 weeks after. After another stupid radio interview we went shopping for baby necessities leaving the boys to decorate our spare room, we had to buy everything and ran up a huge bill, thank god my dad hasn't disowned me, he paid for everything.
***
On the 11th of March 1998 I gave birth to my beautiful twin girls by caesarean section. I named them Sydney and Riley, I know, I know they are boy's names but they are sweet.
They grew up fast, looking back I realised how selfish I was not letting him know about them but I did make a sort of scrap book of everything - I wrote everything down and had loads of pictures incase I ever built up the courage to tell him. They are identical in everyway looks wise and only people who have known them their own life can tell them apart, but in personality they couldn't be more different - Sydney is very girly but like her parents prefers rock to hip hop, whereas Riley is a total rock chick and loves punk, they both love Green Day, and I'm always worried in case they realise their resemblance to him, (they have his eyes and hair colour).
When the girls where 8 we were only on our 4th album (we took a break) and I bought my own house. That we've lived in 'til this day.
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