Not All Roses Are Red, chapter 2
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It had been two weeks since I had given Billie my number, and because of the past, I pretty much knew that I wasn't going to hear from them...I mean I can't say that I'm not sad, but I can't say I'm not mad. It would be so much different to have them in my life again, after all of them broke my heart, they all said we would be together forever...oh yeah I really believe that now.
I was just finishing up signing some papers for the new band that had just gotten signed and was heading out of my job, to go to my place. I didn't live in much, after my ex left me he took our house, so I had no other choice but to find a little house or something.
As I was walking down the street I started thinking about what would have happened if I never met 'Green Day', or what would have happened if Billie and I were still together, if Adrienne never came in and took away the one thing that I thought would always keep me alive.
I went up to my house and and unlocked the door. I went to my closet and took out the old shoe box with all of my old pictures.
There was one there when Billie and had first started dating, he was hugging me close to him, my blonde hair in a pony tail, kissing Billie's cheek.
-Flash Back-
We were walking to school, the day after Billie and I had gotten together.
"Do you have practice after school?" I asked him, as we were walking his hand in mine.
"Yeah, do you want to come and watch?" He asked looking me in the eyes, with that smile that I oh so love.
"Of course, Love," I answered looking into those wonderful green eyes.
After he was done with practice, Mike, himself and I were hanging out. Mike took a picture of Billie Joe hugging me and me kissing his cheek.
-End Flash Back-
"Good times...I miss those times," I muttered to myself, looking at a picture of Billie Joe and I before he left for tour and I didn't see him again until two weeks ago. I felt tears slide down my cheeks, remembering how hurt I was when I found out he had found someone else, but didn't have the balls to actually dump me, remembering the fact that I didn't talk to any of the Green Day members for almost a decade, remembering how I used to feel for Billie Joe.
At that moment I got more words in my head and put them down on a piece of paper.
Am I what you expected?
Am I what you wanted?
Messed up
Fucked up
Screwed beyond
Believe
Just like you
Not right
Just sit tight
Everything will be alright
We'll be just right
Fine, whatever
We'll be gone
Forever
Am I exactly
What you wanted
To be?
Then I got something else going, and wrote it down too.
I know we aren't together
Anymore
But to know you're with her
Just makes it hurt more
To open a wound
That shall remain
Closed
To open a heart
That can't seem
To just fine
To divided myself
In a line
What is right?
What is wrong?
Blind me
Make me not see
I don't want to
See you with her
Hurt my heart
More then
It can handle
Close me off
Make me deaf
Don't tell me a
Thing
Make it impossible
To hear a anyone or
Anything
Take away the feeling
Of being lonely
Take away the hurt
That you caused
Me
Cut so deep
Shredded inside
Make it hurt
Make it define
Show me I mean
Something
Show me I am
Me
Show me I can
Be more then
A sex machine
I'm hurt to the point
Of believe
There is a fine line
Between right and wrong
Where nothing is fine
We are on that line
I personally didn't think it was good. I stopped after that and put in at that moment, Dookie and listened to when I come around.
I heard you cryin'
Loud all the way
Across town
To be searchin' for that
Someone and it's me out on
The prowl as you sit
Around feelin'
Sorry for yourself
Well, don't get lonely now
And dry your whining eyes
I'm just roamin'
For that moment...
The phone started to ring, I turned off the music.
"Hello?"
"Hi, is this Hannah?"
"Yes, may I ask who she is talking to?" I asked.
"Oh yeah, it's Billie Joe." Of course two fucking weeks later you call, jackass.
"Oh, hey what's up?"
"The boys and I were wondering if you wanted to hang out tomorrow?"
"Sure, come to my place," I gave him my address, and we talked a little longer then said out farewells.
What will the morning bring?
I woke up and got ready, the guys would be here in almost a hour. I got into the shower, got dressed and did my make-up. Just as I had finished I heard my doorbell ring.
"Coming!" I yell.
I opened the door and there they are, the three guys that I thought I would never see again.
"Hey you guys, come in make yourselves at home." I showed them the living room, where I had left all of the pictures and poems from last night, and of course Billie being who he is just had to look.
He first looked at the two I had wrote last night, then he found 'Not All Roses Are Red', one of my best.
"Did you write these?" He asked.
"Yeah, I did," I answered back.
"Hey guys read this!" They read it and they told me how great they were.
By eight o'clock that night we were all drunk. Mike and Tre had found their way to my guest beds, so it just left me and Billie. We soon were talking...slurring almost every word, when out of nowhere, I feel those moist lips I love so much press against mine. His tounge was begging for entrance, and I let him, honestly this is the most action I had gotten since my ex left me.
We soon found ourselves in my bed peeling each others clothes off.
What would the morning bring?
I was just finishing up signing some papers for the new band that had just gotten signed and was heading out of my job, to go to my place. I didn't live in much, after my ex left me he took our house, so I had no other choice but to find a little house or something.
As I was walking down the street I started thinking about what would have happened if I never met 'Green Day', or what would have happened if Billie and I were still together, if Adrienne never came in and took away the one thing that I thought would always keep me alive.
I went up to my house and and unlocked the door. I went to my closet and took out the old shoe box with all of my old pictures.
There was one there when Billie and had first started dating, he was hugging me close to him, my blonde hair in a pony tail, kissing Billie's cheek.
-Flash Back-
We were walking to school, the day after Billie and I had gotten together.
"Do you have practice after school?" I asked him, as we were walking his hand in mine.
"Yeah, do you want to come and watch?" He asked looking me in the eyes, with that smile that I oh so love.
"Of course, Love," I answered looking into those wonderful green eyes.
After he was done with practice, Mike, himself and I were hanging out. Mike took a picture of Billie Joe hugging me and me kissing his cheek.
-End Flash Back-
"Good times...I miss those times," I muttered to myself, looking at a picture of Billie Joe and I before he left for tour and I didn't see him again until two weeks ago. I felt tears slide down my cheeks, remembering how hurt I was when I found out he had found someone else, but didn't have the balls to actually dump me, remembering the fact that I didn't talk to any of the Green Day members for almost a decade, remembering how I used to feel for Billie Joe.
At that moment I got more words in my head and put them down on a piece of paper.
Am I what you expected?
Am I what you wanted?
Messed up
Fucked up
Screwed beyond
Believe
Just like you
Not right
Just sit tight
Everything will be alright
We'll be just right
Fine, whatever
We'll be gone
Forever
Am I exactly
What you wanted
To be?
Then I got something else going, and wrote it down too.
I know we aren't together
Anymore
But to know you're with her
Just makes it hurt more
To open a wound
That shall remain
Closed
To open a heart
That can't seem
To just fine
To divided myself
In a line
What is right?
What is wrong?
Blind me
Make me not see
I don't want to
See you with her
Hurt my heart
More then
It can handle
Close me off
Make me deaf
Don't tell me a
Thing
Make it impossible
To hear a anyone or
Anything
Take away the feeling
Of being lonely
Take away the hurt
That you caused
Me
Cut so deep
Shredded inside
Make it hurt
Make it define
Show me I mean
Something
Show me I am
Me
Show me I can
Be more then
A sex machine
I'm hurt to the point
Of believe
There is a fine line
Between right and wrong
Where nothing is fine
We are on that line
I personally didn't think it was good. I stopped after that and put in at that moment, Dookie and listened to when I come around.
I heard you cryin'
Loud all the way
Across town
To be searchin' for that
Someone and it's me out on
The prowl as you sit
Around feelin'
Sorry for yourself
Well, don't get lonely now
And dry your whining eyes
I'm just roamin'
For that moment...
The phone started to ring, I turned off the music.
"Hello?"
"Hi, is this Hannah?"
"Yes, may I ask who she is talking to?" I asked.
"Oh yeah, it's Billie Joe." Of course two fucking weeks later you call, jackass.
"Oh, hey what's up?"
"The boys and I were wondering if you wanted to hang out tomorrow?"
"Sure, come to my place," I gave him my address, and we talked a little longer then said out farewells.
What will the morning bring?
I woke up and got ready, the guys would be here in almost a hour. I got into the shower, got dressed and did my make-up. Just as I had finished I heard my doorbell ring.
"Coming!" I yell.
I opened the door and there they are, the three guys that I thought I would never see again.
"Hey you guys, come in make yourselves at home." I showed them the living room, where I had left all of the pictures and poems from last night, and of course Billie being who he is just had to look.
He first looked at the two I had wrote last night, then he found 'Not All Roses Are Red', one of my best.
"Did you write these?" He asked.
"Yeah, I did," I answered back.
"Hey guys read this!" They read it and they told me how great they were.
By eight o'clock that night we were all drunk. Mike and Tre had found their way to my guest beds, so it just left me and Billie. We soon were talking...slurring almost every word, when out of nowhere, I feel those moist lips I love so much press against mine. His tounge was begging for entrance, and I let him, honestly this is the most action I had gotten since my ex left me.
We soon found ourselves in my bed peeling each others clothes off.
What would the morning bring?
