But, Billie Joe! I Do Love You!, chapter 1
Billie Joe Armstrong sat in his living room watching television with his two sons; Joseph and Jakob.
All of a sudden his beautiful wife, Adrienne came through the door carrying some sacks containing supper for this evening. Billie got up as did Joey and Jake to help Adrienne. "Let me get that for you, dear," Billie said in a crisp, british accent.
"I'll get that for you Mother," Joey said in the same tone of voice.
Adrienne looked at them all funny. "Uhm...Billie? Joey? Jake? Why are you all helping me? You usually sit on the couch and watch," she said dully.
"Shh! It's for the story! Now be quiet, and play along!" Billie hushed. Adrienne shook her head and put away some hamburger.
After awhile Tre Cool decided to come over and take Billie on a walk. Tre held up Billie's pink rhinestone collar and leash.
"Come on, boy! Let's go for a walk!" Billie barked and trotted over on all fours, getting his stuff on for a walk.
Once they were outside going on their walk, a girl about the age of 15 saw Billie and gasped.
"Like! Oh my God! It's Billie Joe! Ahh! I love you Billie Joe, you're my life and love!" Billie stopped walking and looked up, tears in his eyes. Tre let go of his leash and looked fondly at them. Billie got up and started running toward the girl, his arms out stretched.
We are now viewing a large field of flowers, everything is in slow motion, the girl is wearing a pink tube top and pink leather mini skirt and pink heals. They are now coming close, the girl jumps up, expecting Billie to catch her, she falls to the ground with a hard "Thud!" as things speed up to normal and Billie runs past, hugging Mike.
"Oh, Mike! How I love and missed you!" Billie cried, kissing Mike's face. Mike got disguisted and threw Billie off of him, Billie landed on his ass, hard.
"Ow! Why'd you do that?!" Billie yelled, rubbing his rump. Tre runs over to see what all's happening.
"You moron! Ick! Why'd you kiss me?!" Mike demanded.
"I'm a puppy! I'm supposed to love you up!" Billie declared.
"Oh...." Mike mumbled.
A Couple Of Weeks Later Billie and Ronnie are in a gym, the trainer is Jason.
We see Jason standing in a blue t-shirt and black work out pants and white trainers. Billie enters listening to an iPod and a sweatband around his head, wearing a red t-shirt and the same type of shoes and pants as Jason. Ronnie is wearing a pink sports bra and tight black yoga pants and white running shoes, pushing buttons on his cell phone.
"Hi, we're here for our work out," Billie said, chewing on his gum loudly.
"Hello, I'm Jason and I'm your trainer. It's 5:55 right now, you were supposed to be here 50 minutes ago," Jason said to them.
"We were here 50 minutes ago." Billie said, chewing on his gum, in a cocky tone of voice.
"Why didn't you come find me?" Jason asked confused.
"Why didn't you come find us?" Billie snapped back.
"Oh, well, erm...yeah. I have to go in twenty minutes, but I could get you started today if you want." Jason said, in a kind tone.
"What do you think babe?" Billie asked, turning to Ronnie. "You wanna get started today?"
"I don't care," Ronnie mumbled in a high pitched tone, chewing on his gum.
"Okay, well, I'll ask you guys some questions...." Jason mumbled, pulling out his clip-board. "What are your goals here?" Jason asked.
"My goal is to buy a horse," Billie said, once again in a cocky tone and chewing his gum.
"No, I mean physically," said Jason.
"I want to physically buy a horse," Billie stated, chewing on his gum and pulling his pants up in a cocky way.
"Okay, next question, ma'am?" Jason asked Ronnie. "What is your goal?" he asked.
"I want to loose 45 pounds," Ronnie said, not looking up from his cell phone and chewing his gum.
"You want to loose 45 pounds?!" Jason asked, confused once again.
"Yeah," Ronnie said in a bitch tone.
"Miss, losing 45 pounds would not be good for you," Jason told her sternly.
"Oh, well, I wanna buy a horse too," Ronnie continued playing with his cell phone.
"Okay, well, let's test your heart rate." Jason walked over to a tred mill and Ronnie followed. "Have you ever used one of these before?" Jason asked, setting the tread mill.
"Yeah," Ronnie stepped on the tread mill, he started going back, not walking like he should.
He stepped off, not looking up and walked back to his spot and stood. "How was it babe?" Billie asked in a cocky tone, once again.
"It was fun. Like those side walks from the Jetsons," Ronnie said dully.
"She can do a great Astro impression, do it babe," Billie ordered Ronnie. Jason looked curious.
Ronnie looked up from his cell, annoyed, he rolled his eyes and sighed. "Ruff, ruff, ruff." He looked back down. Billie smirked in a smart-ass way.
"I can do Shaggy from Scooby Doo," Billie said in a bragging way.
"Yeah, do your Shaggy voice." Ronnie mumbled.
Jason waited a couple of moments. "Aren't your going to do it?" he asked.
"No," Billie said, in a smart ass tone, with the smirk on his face again.
All of a sudden his beautiful wife, Adrienne came through the door carrying some sacks containing supper for this evening. Billie got up as did Joey and Jake to help Adrienne. "Let me get that for you, dear," Billie said in a crisp, british accent.
"I'll get that for you Mother," Joey said in the same tone of voice.
Adrienne looked at them all funny. "Uhm...Billie? Joey? Jake? Why are you all helping me? You usually sit on the couch and watch," she said dully.
"Shh! It's for the story! Now be quiet, and play along!" Billie hushed. Adrienne shook her head and put away some hamburger.
After awhile Tre Cool decided to come over and take Billie on a walk. Tre held up Billie's pink rhinestone collar and leash.
"Come on, boy! Let's go for a walk!" Billie barked and trotted over on all fours, getting his stuff on for a walk.
Once they were outside going on their walk, a girl about the age of 15 saw Billie and gasped.
"Like! Oh my God! It's Billie Joe! Ahh! I love you Billie Joe, you're my life and love!" Billie stopped walking and looked up, tears in his eyes. Tre let go of his leash and looked fondly at them. Billie got up and started running toward the girl, his arms out stretched.
We are now viewing a large field of flowers, everything is in slow motion, the girl is wearing a pink tube top and pink leather mini skirt and pink heals. They are now coming close, the girl jumps up, expecting Billie to catch her, she falls to the ground with a hard "Thud!" as things speed up to normal and Billie runs past, hugging Mike.
"Oh, Mike! How I love and missed you!" Billie cried, kissing Mike's face. Mike got disguisted and threw Billie off of him, Billie landed on his ass, hard.
"Ow! Why'd you do that?!" Billie yelled, rubbing his rump. Tre runs over to see what all's happening.
"You moron! Ick! Why'd you kiss me?!" Mike demanded.
"I'm a puppy! I'm supposed to love you up!" Billie declared.
"Oh...." Mike mumbled.
A Couple Of Weeks Later Billie and Ronnie are in a gym, the trainer is Jason.
We see Jason standing in a blue t-shirt and black work out pants and white trainers. Billie enters listening to an iPod and a sweatband around his head, wearing a red t-shirt and the same type of shoes and pants as Jason. Ronnie is wearing a pink sports bra and tight black yoga pants and white running shoes, pushing buttons on his cell phone.
"Hi, we're here for our work out," Billie said, chewing on his gum loudly.
"Hello, I'm Jason and I'm your trainer. It's 5:55 right now, you were supposed to be here 50 minutes ago," Jason said to them.
"We were here 50 minutes ago." Billie said, chewing on his gum, in a cocky tone of voice.
"Why didn't you come find me?" Jason asked confused.
"Why didn't you come find us?" Billie snapped back.
"Oh, well, erm...yeah. I have to go in twenty minutes, but I could get you started today if you want." Jason said, in a kind tone.
"What do you think babe?" Billie asked, turning to Ronnie. "You wanna get started today?"
"I don't care," Ronnie mumbled in a high pitched tone, chewing on his gum.
"Okay, well, I'll ask you guys some questions...." Jason mumbled, pulling out his clip-board. "What are your goals here?" Jason asked.
"My goal is to buy a horse," Billie said, once again in a cocky tone and chewing his gum.
"No, I mean physically," said Jason.
"I want to physically buy a horse," Billie stated, chewing on his gum and pulling his pants up in a cocky way.
"Okay, next question, ma'am?" Jason asked Ronnie. "What is your goal?" he asked.
"I want to loose 45 pounds," Ronnie said, not looking up from his cell phone and chewing his gum.
"You want to loose 45 pounds?!" Jason asked, confused once again.
"Yeah," Ronnie said in a bitch tone.
"Miss, losing 45 pounds would not be good for you," Jason told her sternly.
"Oh, well, I wanna buy a horse too," Ronnie continued playing with his cell phone.
"Okay, well, let's test your heart rate." Jason walked over to a tred mill and Ronnie followed. "Have you ever used one of these before?" Jason asked, setting the tread mill.
"Yeah," Ronnie stepped on the tread mill, he started going back, not walking like he should.
He stepped off, not looking up and walked back to his spot and stood. "How was it babe?" Billie asked in a cocky tone, once again.
"It was fun. Like those side walks from the Jetsons," Ronnie said dully.
"She can do a great Astro impression, do it babe," Billie ordered Ronnie. Jason looked curious.
Ronnie looked up from his cell, annoyed, he rolled his eyes and sighed. "Ruff, ruff, ruff." He looked back down. Billie smirked in a smart-ass way.
"I can do Shaggy from Scooby Doo," Billie said in a bragging way.
"Yeah, do your Shaggy voice." Ronnie mumbled.
Jason waited a couple of moments. "Aren't your going to do it?" he asked.
"No," Billie said, in a smart ass tone, with the smirk on his face again.
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