Affections, chapter 55
The Affections of Tre Part 12
It's a perfect sunset, three days after I got off. We're in that play park, that same play park. All of us. I'm sat on the swings again, Mikey's trying to fit his ass on the kid's slide. Billie and Adi are pushing each other round on the roundabout. We're just a bunch of big kids really.
"You know... " calls Billie thoughtfully, in-between breaths as he pushes Adi, for all that she's a weirdo with... Jesus Adi, you're getting heavy... "
"If I wasn't... Spinning so... Fast I would... Hit you Billie," Adi cuts in indignantly.
"Shush.... Anyway, as I was saying... Even though she's a weirdo with.... Stupid hair and.... I don't really like her music... Right now I really understand... Dolly Parton!" Billie finishes happily, standing back to watch Adi whizzing round and round, her hair spinning out behind her.
There's a thump behind me. Mike's finally made it down the slide, feet hitting the ground heavily. He grins at me, walking up to stand behind me and lean on my shoulders, one arm gripping the chain of the swing so he doesn't fall over, the other half around my neck.
"Billie... What the fuck are you talking about? Dolly Parton?"
I can see the vague discomfort in Billie's eyes as he looks at us... He won't be used to it for a while yet. But me and Mike are officially a couple now. We are allowed to be couple like.
Mmm he smells nice.
Billie grins back at me. "Tre, stop smelling Mike!" I smile sheepishly and sit up a little. "Good. Now, what I meant was that song. You know the one... " He strikes a pose and opens his mouth wide.
"AND IIIIIIII WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOOOOOOOOOU! AND I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOOOOOOOU...."
Adi screeches to a hault, bark chips flying everywhere as she stabs her feet into the ground. She gets up unsteadily and tries to smack Billie as he takes another long breath. He catches her as she falls, dizzy, into his arms instead. Least she got him to stop singing.
"Silence Billie! My ears are bleeding!" she says giggling, as they fall over together. And then, sounding slightly nauseous "Eugh, somebody stop the world please, I wanna get off."
Mikey is laughing softly in my ear too. He gives me a kiss on the cheek, before standing up straight. "You're on something Billie Joe Armstrong, I swear. I have no idea what you are talking about."
He walks slowly and easily over to pick Adi up, playfully shoving Billie around a little. I see the three of them laughing and joking, with the sun going down behind them, kissing the tops of their heads and making them all golden, like they were covered in honey. Sugary sweet, the three of them. And I can see what Billie was getting at.
"I know what you meant Bill." I say, looking at him, knowing that a perfectly happy smile is on my face. "Look at us four. Look at what we've been through and had to deal with. And after all that... "
"... We're still together!" finished Billie triumphantly.
"Aww come on. Don't go all sappy on us you guys!" laughs Adi, her face all covered in smiles like mine.
I jump off the swing, running up to grab her, haul her over my shoulder like she's a sack of potatoes.
"Tre, my face is in your ass!" she screams, hysterical laughter breaking her voice.
"Oooh, Adi... "
"Hey!" Mike and Billie shout out, perfectly in time, grabbing us to separate their respective partners. Mikey hugs me around the waist as Billie locks hands with Adi.
"They're right though Adi... " says Mikey, talking to her but smiling to me. "I don't think that I've ever felt so close to you guys than I do today."
I look down at my feet, embarrassed at what I have to say. I'm always embarrassed about opening up, even to them. "I... I'm afraid because... Because I know that there are going to be lots of difficult times ahead of me... Ahead of us. But then at the same time I feel safe and happy because I know that we'll face them together. And come out on top. Hell, that's what we always do!"
I sweep them all into a huge bear hug. Drummers make kick ass huggers. It's so true. Because of my broad manly muscles. And all that sexy shit. Heh heh heh.
"Tre... Love ya and everything but... Sort of... Having difficulty breathing here... " Adi gasps. I drop them all. Adrienne shivers as the sun finally disappears. Mikey takes my hand and points out the first stars appearing, as Billie slips his arm around Adi's shoulders.
"Guess we should head back guys. It's getting dark." murmurs Bill, intent on the sparkling sky.
"Yeah, its getting dark." chips in Adi. "And cold." she adds, shivering again.
"I really should get back to Frankito." I add, letting go of Mike's hand reluctantly as we go out of the gate.
Adi and Billie say lingering goodbyes as they slide into their car, waving out of the windows manically until they turn the corner at the end of the street. Mike and I walk along in comfortable silence for a while.
Suddenly I'm walking on alone. I turn around and see Mike has stopped a few yards down the sidewalk.
"What's up?" I ask, walking back to him. "Muffin? Sweetie pie? Honey bun?" I add, poking his side playfully. He grins shyly at me.
"Tre do you think that... Maybe... I could go back like... With you?"
I laugh happily. "It wouldn't be the first time Mikey, but its late, and you know... Frankito and all... "
As he carries on looking at the cracks in the concrete slabs of the sidewalk, I realise he wasn't asking for a fuck. I suddenly feel a sweet rush of pure affection for this man, standing in the twilight, bashful like a little girl.
I step closer to him, leaning in to kiss him softly, just once, then pull back so we're nose to nose.
"Mikey when we're together I'm... "
"Tre when I'm with you I feel like... "
We both stop, embarrassed.
I smile slowly at him.
"We make each other-"
"-complete." he finishes, grinning back. He takes my hand. Jesus, I've never felt this way before. It's like... Fuck, we even finish each others sentences now.
Its like a teenage chick flick. I feel like Mike should be a cheerleader.
"Tre, I don't want to leave you... When I'm with you I feel like... Well it sounds stupid, but it's like there's a part of me missing when you're gone."
I close my eyes. It must be a dream, I'm going to wake up and find out this whole thing was a result of too many tequilas. Christ, I hope not.
"I don't think it sounds stupid at all. It sounds perfect." I hear him breath in sharply, then let it out in a sigh that flickers across my face. We turn together and begin walking again, still holding hands.
"C'mon Mikey. Let's go home together."
Everywhere is covered in silver light. The moon is up now, like some huge lantern. Man, it looks big tonight. In it's light Mikey looks pale and beautiful, like an angel as he looks up to the heavens that he fell from. The ground is covered in white unbroken light. No clouds to hide the moon away.
There have never been so many stars in the sky, they have never seemed more like diamonds, they have never shone so brightly as they do now, on me and him.
The world has never looked so beautiful, and I have never been so in love.
THE END
It's a perfect sunset, three days after I got off. We're in that play park, that same play park. All of us. I'm sat on the swings again, Mikey's trying to fit his ass on the kid's slide. Billie and Adi are pushing each other round on the roundabout. We're just a bunch of big kids really.
"You know... " calls Billie thoughtfully, in-between breaths as he pushes Adi, for all that she's a weirdo with... Jesus Adi, you're getting heavy... "
"If I wasn't... Spinning so... Fast I would... Hit you Billie," Adi cuts in indignantly.
"Shush.... Anyway, as I was saying... Even though she's a weirdo with.... Stupid hair and.... I don't really like her music... Right now I really understand... Dolly Parton!" Billie finishes happily, standing back to watch Adi whizzing round and round, her hair spinning out behind her.
There's a thump behind me. Mike's finally made it down the slide, feet hitting the ground heavily. He grins at me, walking up to stand behind me and lean on my shoulders, one arm gripping the chain of the swing so he doesn't fall over, the other half around my neck.
"Billie... What the fuck are you talking about? Dolly Parton?"
I can see the vague discomfort in Billie's eyes as he looks at us... He won't be used to it for a while yet. But me and Mike are officially a couple now. We are allowed to be couple like.
Mmm he smells nice.
Billie grins back at me. "Tre, stop smelling Mike!" I smile sheepishly and sit up a little. "Good. Now, what I meant was that song. You know the one... " He strikes a pose and opens his mouth wide.
"AND IIIIIIII WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOOOOOOOOOU! AND I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOOOOOOOU...."
Adi screeches to a hault, bark chips flying everywhere as she stabs her feet into the ground. She gets up unsteadily and tries to smack Billie as he takes another long breath. He catches her as she falls, dizzy, into his arms instead. Least she got him to stop singing.
"Silence Billie! My ears are bleeding!" she says giggling, as they fall over together. And then, sounding slightly nauseous "Eugh, somebody stop the world please, I wanna get off."
Mikey is laughing softly in my ear too. He gives me a kiss on the cheek, before standing up straight. "You're on something Billie Joe Armstrong, I swear. I have no idea what you are talking about."
He walks slowly and easily over to pick Adi up, playfully shoving Billie around a little. I see the three of them laughing and joking, with the sun going down behind them, kissing the tops of their heads and making them all golden, like they were covered in honey. Sugary sweet, the three of them. And I can see what Billie was getting at.
"I know what you meant Bill." I say, looking at him, knowing that a perfectly happy smile is on my face. "Look at us four. Look at what we've been through and had to deal with. And after all that... "
"... We're still together!" finished Billie triumphantly.
"Aww come on. Don't go all sappy on us you guys!" laughs Adi, her face all covered in smiles like mine.
I jump off the swing, running up to grab her, haul her over my shoulder like she's a sack of potatoes.
"Tre, my face is in your ass!" she screams, hysterical laughter breaking her voice.
"Oooh, Adi... "
"Hey!" Mike and Billie shout out, perfectly in time, grabbing us to separate their respective partners. Mikey hugs me around the waist as Billie locks hands with Adi.
"They're right though Adi... " says Mikey, talking to her but smiling to me. "I don't think that I've ever felt so close to you guys than I do today."
I look down at my feet, embarrassed at what I have to say. I'm always embarrassed about opening up, even to them. "I... I'm afraid because... Because I know that there are going to be lots of difficult times ahead of me... Ahead of us. But then at the same time I feel safe and happy because I know that we'll face them together. And come out on top. Hell, that's what we always do!"
I sweep them all into a huge bear hug. Drummers make kick ass huggers. It's so true. Because of my broad manly muscles. And all that sexy shit. Heh heh heh.
"Tre... Love ya and everything but... Sort of... Having difficulty breathing here... " Adi gasps. I drop them all. Adrienne shivers as the sun finally disappears. Mikey takes my hand and points out the first stars appearing, as Billie slips his arm around Adi's shoulders.
"Guess we should head back guys. It's getting dark." murmurs Bill, intent on the sparkling sky.
"Yeah, its getting dark." chips in Adi. "And cold." she adds, shivering again.
"I really should get back to Frankito." I add, letting go of Mike's hand reluctantly as we go out of the gate.
Adi and Billie say lingering goodbyes as they slide into their car, waving out of the windows manically until they turn the corner at the end of the street. Mike and I walk along in comfortable silence for a while.
Suddenly I'm walking on alone. I turn around and see Mike has stopped a few yards down the sidewalk.
"What's up?" I ask, walking back to him. "Muffin? Sweetie pie? Honey bun?" I add, poking his side playfully. He grins shyly at me.
"Tre do you think that... Maybe... I could go back like... With you?"
I laugh happily. "It wouldn't be the first time Mikey, but its late, and you know... Frankito and all... "
As he carries on looking at the cracks in the concrete slabs of the sidewalk, I realise he wasn't asking for a fuck. I suddenly feel a sweet rush of pure affection for this man, standing in the twilight, bashful like a little girl.
I step closer to him, leaning in to kiss him softly, just once, then pull back so we're nose to nose.
"Mikey when we're together I'm... "
"Tre when I'm with you I feel like... "
We both stop, embarrassed.
I smile slowly at him.
"We make each other-"
"-complete." he finishes, grinning back. He takes my hand. Jesus, I've never felt this way before. It's like... Fuck, we even finish each others sentences now.
Its like a teenage chick flick. I feel like Mike should be a cheerleader.
"Tre, I don't want to leave you... When I'm with you I feel like... Well it sounds stupid, but it's like there's a part of me missing when you're gone."
I close my eyes. It must be a dream, I'm going to wake up and find out this whole thing was a result of too many tequilas. Christ, I hope not.
"I don't think it sounds stupid at all. It sounds perfect." I hear him breath in sharply, then let it out in a sigh that flickers across my face. We turn together and begin walking again, still holding hands.
"C'mon Mikey. Let's go home together."
Everywhere is covered in silver light. The moon is up now, like some huge lantern. Man, it looks big tonight. In it's light Mikey looks pale and beautiful, like an angel as he looks up to the heavens that he fell from. The ground is covered in white unbroken light. No clouds to hide the moon away.
There have never been so many stars in the sky, they have never seemed more like diamonds, they have never shone so brightly as they do now, on me and him.
The world has never looked so beautiful, and I have never been so in love.
THE END
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