Is it too much to ask for?
I bet most of you are too young and haven't been in this situation before.
I live on my own...well partly on my own. I live in a flatshare with a guy. I couldn't chose my flatmate. Some institution gives out the places in the flats. So here I am, having to live with a total stranger.
He moved in some weeks ago; actually, its probably already 2 months. And it's like hell.
He is pretty nice, and made a good first impression. BUT
I can barely sleep at night anymore because of him ._. Once I am about to fall asleep or actually sleep he walks around the corridor and closes his door LOUDLY -___- like...not out of anger...he just doesn't know how to use a doorknob.
And woop little me is up again. 
And he goes to sleep at like 2am and wakes up at 8 -___- WTF ...or he talks to his girlfriend really loud.
Also, the flat is dirty as feck. He's a real messy. I can't even sit down on my own toilet coz its so disgusting. IT'S EVEN CLEANER ON A PUBLIC TOILET. grrr. And there's basically parts of food on the wall in the kitchen
So today I turned out to be the one again who was actually cleaning after HE had a PARTY last night. But I just can't take it. It's so messy. I cleaned it all: toilet, kitchen, floor. And now I feel better again. I wonder how long it'll stay clean. I made a plan and hung it up on the door so he knows that he also has to clean. I hope he will.
And some days ago we didn't even have toilet paper. Well I had my own that I was hiding because it was his turn to buy some. And also his girlfriend practically moved in here which actually isn't even allowed -___-
So yeah. I love my life. I really do. I have a great boyfriend, a great family and awesome friends. I am an all around happy girl. But the lack of sleep, the uncomfortable feeling in your own home brings tears to my eyes. I go to visit my parents as often as I can.
Now you might ask why I don't move out. It's a cheep flat, I can't afford a different one. It's close to university. And I have a balcony. I would be dumb to give up such a nice flat. But seriously, I can't do more than tell him to clean.I don't want to fight with him, because we have to live together. But I can't let him be all messy and loud.
Is it too much to ask for a clean flat?
I live on my own...well partly on my own. I live in a flatshare with a guy. I couldn't chose my flatmate. Some institution gives out the places in the flats. So here I am, having to live with a total stranger.
He moved in some weeks ago; actually, its probably already 2 months. And it's like hell.
He is pretty nice, and made a good first impression. BUT
I can barely sleep at night anymore because of him ._. Once I am about to fall asleep or actually sleep he walks around the corridor and closes his door LOUDLY -___- like...not out of anger...he just doesn't know how to use a doorknob.
And woop little me is up again. And he goes to sleep at like 2am and wakes up at 8 -___- WTF ...or he talks to his girlfriend really loud.Also, the flat is dirty as feck. He's a real messy. I can't even sit down on my own toilet coz its so disgusting. IT'S EVEN CLEANER ON A PUBLIC TOILET. grrr. And there's basically parts of food on the wall in the kitchen
So today I turned out to be the one again who was actually cleaning after HE had a PARTY last night. But I just can't take it. It's so messy. I cleaned it all: toilet, kitchen, floor. And now I feel better again. I wonder how long it'll stay clean. I made a plan and hung it up on the door so he knows that he also has to clean. I hope he will.
And some days ago we didn't even have toilet paper. Well I had my own that I was hiding because it was his turn to buy some. And also his girlfriend practically moved in here which actually isn't even allowed -___-
So yeah. I love my life. I really do. I have a great boyfriend, a great family and awesome friends. I am an all around happy girl. But the lack of sleep, the uncomfortable feeling in your own home brings tears to my eyes. I go to visit my parents as often as I can.
Now you might ask why I don't move out. It's a cheep flat, I can't afford a different one. It's close to university. And I have a balcony. I would be dumb to give up such a nice flat. But seriously, I can't do more than tell him to clean.I don't want to fight with him, because we have to live together. But I can't let him be all messy and loud.
Is it too much to ask for a clean flat?
thanx!
Love, May 29th, 2007 at 03:48:47am
I've been in a similar living situation and I understand your frustration. And really, it just comes down to people being inconsiderate...and oblivious to others, haha. I finally caved and said something to my messy roommate and she said the same thing yours did, "just tell me when I'm doing it", but nothing changed. She still left everything a mess, still banged cupboards and doors--it was like she thought she was the only person in the building. And as you know, it's hard to break someone of these habits.
I also started purposely spending time away from my apartment because of the frustration, and it's terrible when you get to that point. I mean, that's your home. You should be comfortable and content there. Eventually I just sat her down--for about the 12th time--and as calmly as possible told her either she actually needed to make the changes she said she would, or she needed to find a new place to live. It was a sh*tty thing to have to do, but you can only be kind and hear the apologies for so long. You need to be able to be happy in your home otherwise you'll lose your mind.
Good luck with your situation! I hope it improves!
iATEjimmysWORLD, May 27th, 2007 at 11:07:13pm
that really sucks. expecially the fact he's marking your exam.
thats just corrupt.
I think maybe you should swap with someone else in the building...
or just see if you can talk it out with him be like "this is repulsive.. please.. jut try and be a little cleaner.. you are living witha female, not your football mates.. please, just help me out a bit here and there.."
and if that doesnt work.. become friends with his girlfriend,, and get her to help ypou convince him..
waiting_a_long_time, May 27th, 2007 at 01:59:27am
yeah.
and on addition to that he's the assistand of one of my profs and will correct my exam.
so
I better don't make him be mad at me!!
Love, May 26th, 2007 at 05:24:52pm
That's a pretty sucky situation.
You don't wanna fight with him or whatever, and he'd get all pissed if you like forced him to change his ~lifestyle~.
I guess you can kinda have to live with this, try ear plucks and make him clean as often as you can. xD
rollerpig, May 26th, 2007 at 05:06:44pm
it aint too much to ask
you should confront him on the cleaning issue and talk it out, he has to take some responsibility aswell, not just you. You aint his slave.
But it does sound like a nice place to live, and dont let anything ruin your good mood.
PaNcAkEs, May 26th, 2007 at 03:53:14pm
Yea, just talk to him. Tell him that it bothers you, and that if you're both going to live there then you have to make some compromises and clean up after yourselves as well.
threeam., May 26th, 2007 at 02:27:23pm
yeah.
I'll see how the rota works.
And if he keeps on being loud I'll show him how to use a doorknob :cheese:
XD
I feel like I'm living with a 5 year old
Love, May 26th, 2007 at 02:20:28pm
Oh and for the sleeping thing, couldn't you get earplugs or something?
And maybe if you notice the place needs cleaning just say to him
'Hey, will you stay here and help me clean today, please?'
Mike Dirnt., May 26th, 2007 at 02:16:34pm
I did that
but I can't forbit him to have parties
Love, May 26th, 2007 at 02:06:04pm
Stick a rota on the fridge or something of when he cleans and when you clean
Just tell him like.. if he doesn't stick to it then he shouldnt have partys?
Mike Dirnt., May 26th, 2007 at 02:04:08pm
yeah I guess I'll have to do it if it doesn't change.
Would be pretty lame though to be honest.
Love, May 26th, 2007 at 02:01:28pm
Couldn't you talk to the people in charge?
ktots, May 26th, 2007 at 01:59:43pm
I already have :/ and he's all "yeah of course no problem just tell me"
but nothing really changes
I already talked to him 4 times or something
Love, May 26th, 2007 at 01:56:25pm
You're going to have to talk to him
Just ask him to help clean it with you
And tell him that it's stressing you out
Mike Dirnt., May 26th, 2007 at 01:54:47pm