Young, naive and happy.
I've been strict to myself lately, to always be right and never waste any time. To seize everyday, to talk no bullshit, to not lie to myself. I may sound very stupid to tell you this, but I will anyway; being correct isn't always right.
I always tell myself to not get lazy or waste an entire day in front of the computer, dressed in ugly pants and way too big shirts. Live every day as if it was your last. Make up plans to always follow, make your life a schedule and a routine that must strictly be followed. But I always run from my plans. It's too easy to slip away.
But you know what? I'm much better off that way! I feel so much better when I can just go whatever I feel like. Even though my plan of the day might have been taking a walk and watering flowers, I could spend it playing videogames instead if that's what I feel like. I have figured that it's the way I want to live. I want to wake up in the morning, and do whatever I feel the will to. I sound so naive and I'm aware of it - but I like to follow my impulses. I always smile more at night when summarizing the day if something completely unexpected happened, than if I just followed routines.
Yes, I am a teenager and these are probably very common thoughts of people my age - but who gives a damn? Take your chance to live like this before you might not be able to. I enjoy being silly.
So many times, I have told myself 'everybody feels this way, I will feel bad about being so naive when I'm older' - but do I want to grow older and look back and think 'I was so boring and afraid'? Obviously not. I want to look back on being young with thoughts of being and feeling free. This is my life now. Thinking that the older me would think I wasted my time is really to waste your time.
I love ending up at a friend's house when I least expected to, I love to take the train somewhere else because I felt like so, I love to think and say somebody looks great because it just hit me, I love to write long blogs about feeling free because I want to, I love to do my homework during a break instead of home, I love to stay up to watch a film that I randomly zapped by, I love buying candy even though it's not Saturday, I love going to the movies even if I can't really afford it... I am young, naive, and I'm happy.
I always tell myself to not get lazy or waste an entire day in front of the computer, dressed in ugly pants and way too big shirts. Live every day as if it was your last. Make up plans to always follow, make your life a schedule and a routine that must strictly be followed. But I always run from my plans. It's too easy to slip away.
But you know what? I'm much better off that way! I feel so much better when I can just go whatever I feel like. Even though my plan of the day might have been taking a walk and watering flowers, I could spend it playing videogames instead if that's what I feel like. I have figured that it's the way I want to live. I want to wake up in the morning, and do whatever I feel the will to. I sound so naive and I'm aware of it - but I like to follow my impulses. I always smile more at night when summarizing the day if something completely unexpected happened, than if I just followed routines.
Yes, I am a teenager and these are probably very common thoughts of people my age - but who gives a damn? Take your chance to live like this before you might not be able to. I enjoy being silly.
So many times, I have told myself 'everybody feels this way, I will feel bad about being so naive when I'm older' - but do I want to grow older and look back and think 'I was so boring and afraid'? Obviously not. I want to look back on being young with thoughts of being and feeling free. This is my life now. Thinking that the older me would think I wasted my time is really to waste your time.
I love ending up at a friend's house when I least expected to, I love to take the train somewhere else because I felt like so, I love to think and say somebody looks great because it just hit me, I love to write long blogs about feeling free because I want to, I love to do my homework during a break instead of home, I love to stay up to watch a film that I randomly zapped by, I love buying candy even though it's not Saturday, I love going to the movies even if I can't really afford it... I am young, naive, and I'm happy.
I love ending up at a friend's house when I least expected to,
I agree =] That's always fun. And you're right, sometimes you just need to chill out and roll with whatever is going on around you. Obviously, being structured is important too, but so is just having fun, especially as a teenager. Great blog.
Kurtni, April 19th, 2008 at 09:55:46am
That sounds great. =)
I feel this way sometimes as well. Sometimes it's as if I'm wasting away my life, but what do I know? I'm 14 years old and I'm in the 21st century. The stuff I do is considered normal, so good for you.
threeam., April 18th, 2008 at 07:34:38pm
:] i'm so glad for you that you've found something, and are doing somethng that keeps you happy, and that you're able to keep your head above water and not waste a moment being sad.
*hugs*
Bubble Wrap., April 18th, 2008 at 06:14:53pm