Friends with benefits

I don't know how it all ended up this way. We were supposed to be friends, but it didn't stop there, did it? It evolved to something else, we evolved to something else, and sometimes I wish that I had used my brain instead of my heart and disengaged you from the start - correction; sometimes I wish we'd never even met.

You've hurt me in so many ways, I'll never forget about that one night when we were at the same party and you went into the bathroom with one of my girl friends. As I pressed my ear against the bathroom door I tried hard to convince myself that I didn't care about you two at all. I almost managed to convince myself to believe that the night before we had spent together, meant as little to me as it did to you.

Little did I know that I'd give in to you a second time just a couple of weeks after you broke my heart for the first time. Little did I know that I'd be spending countless sleepless nights in your bed, thinking about the small of your back, touching the small of your back. Little did I know that I'd be spending and equal amount of nights in my own bed, thinking about you, thinking about our so called friendship and of course; over analyzing your words.

I love falling asleep next to you, cheek to cheek, with your warm breath brushing against my skin. I can spend hours playing 'connect the dots' on your back. Sometimes I end up with star signs, and sometimes I end up trying to decipher some secret code. But you usually interrupt me by pulling me closer or by breathing warm air into my neck, sending shivers down my spine.

You've been with me through my highest of highs, and my lowest of lows. And they've all happened because of you. You are my best friend, my other half, I love you in more ways than just one, and sometimes I think you love me back. What I need is a sign. Please, just give me a sign.
Posted on April 27th, 2010 at 04:35pm

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