I Owe You Guys An Apology.

Okay so let me start this off with the fact that most of the blog I posted yesterday I still stand by.

But, I do want to apologize with the topic of "Relationships" and "Self-esteem". Reading them on a day where I'm not nearly as pissed off as I was yesterday makes me feel like a total heartless bitch because I honestly didn't want them to sound how they came out.

Relationships.
I know it goes much deeper than I made it seem. I have been in an emotionally abusive relationship where I felt that I was nothing but stupid next to the guy I was dating. He made it known to me that I wasn't as smart as him and I dumped his ass the next day. It may have been easy for me because he was going to college at the time in another city so the distance made it easier. I know that all relationships aren't like mine and that it is a lot harder than mine was. I'm sorry that I made myself seem insensitive. I'm really sorry.

As for self-esteem.
This made me sound like a total heartless bitch too. And I admit, yesterday I would've kicked a puppy for how angry I was. I know we're all teenagers and self-esteem comes in at different times for people. I've always had good self-esteem (with the exception of last year during prom where all my friends ditched me to smoke weed) and I'm not really sure what it's like to hate who you are what what you look like. I honestly wish you guys could love yourselves like the Beatles loved LSD. Okay maybe that was a dumb simile. So again, I'm sorry for what I said.

Now, I would like to make a special apology to Jordan.
I saw that video you posted and I can tell you that I have guilt radiating from my pores. I never knew your relationship was actually that bad since when you posted about it, you made it seem as kind of a joke. I'm truly sorry about what I said and that it affected you personally. If I could, I would fly to Texas just to give you a hug and buy you something from Starbucks. Really. I'm sorry. ]:

As much as it pains me to admit it (I really don't like admitting this.) I was in the wrong. So for that guys, I'm sorry. I really love you all on most days and you guys are like the online family I never had (insert weird 'huh?' here). So again, I'm sorry for what I said, especially if you took it that personally.
Posted on May 17th, 2011 at 01:43pm

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