Magic Mushrooms!!!, chapter 1
Not behind your house, but behind your neighbour's house there is a wood. Well this story takes place in that very wood. It's about a child who you may have heard of, Billie. When he was younger, younger than you are now, he discovered powers for greater than ever seen before to earth.
Billie was never one of those children who fitted in. He challenged authority, rebelled against his friends and when he wasn't doing this he'd sit in the wood, the very one I told you about, playing his guitar-the only thing which kept him sane. His parents didn't care about him; he hadn't seen them since last week when they went to ASDA and never returned, they again they were never the greatest parents!
Ever since his parents left, Billie was always hungry. He was a growing boy and half the time had to go without food, this caused the start of a new hobby, searching and eating nature's delights. This became sort if a game for him, other children played scrabble and football, but Billie tested his luck with nature. Some days he would win but other days he felt like dying would be less painful.
It was during one of these games that he saw the fairies. You probably think he was drunk and saw them in some sort of blurred vision of the unknown but he would never touch a drop of alcohol. Billie was sitting on his usual tree stump when he first saw some unusual mushrooms. They were unlike anything he had seen before, grey in colour yet with a shape that was intriguing. Billie was risky and took a chance with the mushrooms.
It was that very day that Billie first heard the giggles.
"Who's there?" Billie almost whispered as he glanced around nervously, being unsure of what to think. Laughter still rang out but no one answered.
"Show yourself! I'm err... .armed!" Billie Declared as he stared at his guitar.
"Silly Boy, you could not harm us", this voice sounded so tiny and high pitched that Billie could have been dreaming. Before he had time to reply, he saw from who the voice came from.
"Damn, I look stupid!"
"At least your voice doesn't make you sound like a 3 year old GIRL!" Would you believe that two fairies had appeared before Billie?
If the idea of fairies would surprise you, their appearances would probably scare you half to death. The first fairy looked male but was wearing a blue tutu. The second fairy was also male, shorter than the first, in a frilly pink tutu. He seemed to be enjoying his outfit.
"You always have to do the 'silly boy' speech don't you, Tre?"
"Sure do, it scares the pants off them", Tre replied as confidently as one can with a squeaky tone.
"How much have you drunk?"
"Silly Mike, Not that much", Tre hiccupped then carried on with his giggles.
If anyone of you reading this now had seen these fairies you would probably walk away, making up a feeble excuse like you shouldn't have eaten that last bag of sugar, but not Billie, oh no, he picked up his guitar and began swinging it round at Mike and Tre.
His eyes grew wide, the whites showing pain. The world seemed to be spinning faster and faster till all that was left was a coloured blur and the giggles of a drunken fairy.
The next thing Billie knew, night had fallen over him like a blanket of the unknown. He was entirely unsure of whether this was a dream or not. If you have ever been in a wood in the middle of the night you will know how Billie felt, he picked up his guitar and ran home; that was if he could really call his house home anymore.
Part 2:
As Billie trudged up to the wood, his wood, rain pelted him like thousands of tiny bullets. The sky above was streamed with thick clouds, bringing a dreary mood forward in Billie's thoughts. Today he was guitar-less, his mind wandered too much to even think of playing. He knew he might see the fairies again.
It was only a hunch but he knew he didn't dream what had happened; he had a bruise to prove it, to prove the fairies were real. You are probably thinking: 'why is a boy of Billie's age looking for fairies?' Well I am still not sure and neither was he when he lumbered up to that wood on that chilly autumn morning. As his visible breath left his body he shivered before placing himself on his (now almost frozen) tree stump.
Billie was too cold to move but hungry enough to eat almost anything. His eyes darted round looking for anything within reach. It was the choice of the mushrooms, which he had eaten yesterday, or animal droppings which Billie thought must be fairly fresh by the smell which they were producing. He almost dived on the grey wonders which Billie was beginning to think were the best thing since sliced bread (something he hadn't had for weeks).
He was half way through his third mushroom when he saw something move in the corner of his eye. He spun round to be tapped on the nose with an empty beer bottle, fairy sized.
"What the... " Billie was interrupted before he could finish.
"Have we met before?" asked the beer bottle fairy, which Billie learnt yesterday, was called Tre.
"Remember, he's the guy that attacked us with his string thingy" declared the second fairy which Billie now knew as Mike.
"He attacked us with his... " Tre thought about it for a second then almost hiccupped "... his thong!" Billie stared at the two fairies, before finally uttering:
"Who are you?" He meant to say something like get away from me or I'm going crazy but he found this was all that he could say.
The two fairies were now staring at Billie, well Mike was but with Tre it was hard to tell as he had collapsed.
"I'm Mike and this drunken idiot is Tre", sighed Mike who obviously was getting tired of Tre always being drunk.
"I guess you hate him then" said Billie but with caution in his tone.
"Not always, just when he drinks all the beer and leaves none for me" laughed Mike.
"I am not drunk", slurred Tre, "I'm just a little tipsy". Billie laughed before he realised just how impossible him talking to fairies must be.
Billie turned away from Mike and Tre but neither noticed his departure from their conversation.
"I guess it's happened" he moaned, "I have finally lost my mind". Billie got up, and although it was still cold, he ran. As Billie ran out of site of the fairies Mike heaved a sigh:
"Lost another one I guess"
"You will always have meeeeeeee", these were the last words Tre managed to mumble before he passed out.
Billie couldn't stop running until he got to his house. He came to a dead halt outside and gazed at his home. It was a dump. A tear came to his eye, but Billie quickly wiped it away in case his neighbours saw his pain.
"Is this, what is meant to happen?!" He howled to no one in particular before sprinting inside to gather the few items he still cared about, his guitar, a jacket, his pen knife and a photo from when he used to be happy.
"Why do things ever have to change?" Billie cried as he engraved these words on one of the walls with his knife before running out of his house to nowhere in particular.
Part 3:
Billie had never slept rough before; he had always slept in his bed, in his house but now he had lost both. He knew that the school was after him for playing truant and soon social services would be too, Billie knew he must hide, run away from the pain, and become free. With all odds against him, Billie went to the one place, which had become his true home ever since he realised his parents didn't love him.
The rain poured down onto Billie and as the day finally died he heaved a sigh of shame, was this really the best he could do? As he sheltered underneath one of the trees, in what he liked to think of as his wood, Billie thought about what was going to become of him. He fell asleep that night with hunger in his mind.
As the sun begun to rise, high into the sky, the murmurs and snores were rising out into the wood, echoing off every tree. Billie woke abruptly to the sound of his own snores and the hunger in his stomach. He got up achingly; after all he had just spent a night on the ground, and lumbered over to the opening to in the trees, where he began his breakfast hunt. Billie snorted and gazed up to the sky:
"Great, just what I need", he barked sarcastically, 'A storm'. Billie actually said a lot more, but it's too rude for this story.
He began scoffing down some berries which had fallen from a small bush, sheltered from the oncoming storm by the trees, which towered high above. Many of you will know how good berries taste but you will also know how they do not kill your hunger. Billie gazed around, mumbling to himself:
"Leaf, leaf, grass... " He squinted, trying to get a better look to make sure that they were real, before he yelled "... MUSHROOMS!!"
He dived onto the cluster and immediately began stuffing his face with the delights which he had found! Billie began to feel woozy and sick. He stared at the grey spindly trunks of the mushrooms, leaning back against the nearest tree to tilt his head backwards to stare up at the sky through the leafless branches. The pain that was striking Billie was unbearable.
"I'm going to die", he thought to himself as he lost the ability and will to stay awake.
Part 4:
"Is he dead?" Tre asked Mike.
"Nah, he's breathing" Mike replied although his voice quivered with fear. Tre picked up a long stick and poked Billie in the eye not realising that it had now opened. Both Mike and Tre jumped back as Billie began swearing and swiping out. Although it did not take Billie long before he could see out of his eye again, he was still in agony.
Mike and Tre stared back. It was one of those moments that if you were watching, a tear would come to your eye (yes it really was that beautiful) well that is until Tre, still holding the stick, prodded Billie's other eye. Billie began rolling on the floor, screaming words, which I would rather not repeat.
"Tre?" whispered Mike,
"Yes?" Tre whispered back for no reason
"DO THAT ONE MORE TIME AND I WILL PULL OUT YOUR EYES AND MAKE YOU EAT THEM!" Even Billie stopped screaming in pain at hearing such a loud voice come out of such a tiny fairy. Mike had gone such a shade of red that you would find it hard to find a rosier apple.
A long eerie silence followed the screaming and shouting. Billie had two blood shot eyes, Mike had snapped Tre's twig in half and Tre was on his hands and knees crying over the death of 'Mr Sticky'. It was Billie who finally decided to break the silence
"I guess you must be real then, I mean I can't imagine getting hurt... ' he paused, '... well at least not to that extent.".
"Of course we're real! Why wouldn't we be?" Mike responded. Billie was too ashamed to look Mike in the eye but he managed to be able to glance at Tre, who had turned to drinking over the death of his beloved stick, Billie didn't even bother asking-he knew Tre was one crazy fairy.
After Tre's 12th bottle, Billie thought he must do something. Mike had flown off to get Billie some food, after he claimed the mushrooms were poisonous-which would explain quite a lot.
"You are one pretty oompa loompa", Tre garbled till Billie made the very smart and reasonable idea of gagging him with a spare cloth he had in his pocket and binding him to the nearest toadstool with a spare guitar string. Tre of course, found the cloth very tasty! At the same time as Tre eating the cloth, Billie sat down with his guitar, strumming random chords and notes, waiting till Mike returned.
Billie wasn't sure whether to eat the cake, or the honey or anyone of the other sugary snacks, which Mike had returned with, first! The sweet nectar of caramel ran down Billie's throat (not to mention his face), the biscuits and buns left crumbs on his clothes and for the first time in a long while he was happy. To Billie, Mike had become a friend, he felt like he could trust this fairy, which had once scared and confused him.
"This is my home from now on, no matter what", Billie said out loud to himself in a proud tone. Mike agreed and it wasn't long before the drunken Tre managed to get a word in:
"Welcome To Paradise!"
Part 5:
I wish I could start this part by telling you that Billie's parents had returned and they had moved into a mansion with Mike and Tre and lived happily ever after (following Tre's release from rehab). I'm sorry to say that I can not. Billie still hasn't been reunited with his parents and all 3 are still homeless, as for the rehab centre, well if these three keep on drinking as they have started they will all need it in a few days.
Billie never thought this would become of him, when he was little he dreamt of becoming a famous rock star, having fun with his parents. Mike always had thought he would invent something, which would change the world, and become rich, while Tre always believed he would be a friendless drunken hobo, so the life he was living now was better than he expected!
"Beer anyone?" asked Tre as he handed them round. Billie and Mike declined.
"Suit yourself". Tre sat down on a toadstool and began drinking the beers which he had just offered round. It didn't take Tre long before he became as drunken as the day he first met Billie:
"Row, row, row you boat!!!!!!!!!!!" He began singing completely out of tune "Gently down the stream!!!!!! Something... something... something". He went silent for a minute, drinking another bottle down.
Mike stared at his two friends, Tre drinking whilst Billie tried to start a fire. He never bothered telling Billie that he could start one with his wand; it was fun to watch Billie struggle. Sure Billie had the base of the fire; he just couldn't actually light it. First he tried stones, then sticks then even Tre's empty beer bottles. It wasn't long before Billie lost his temper and Mike had to confess that he could do the task which Billie had tried to complete for so long. This resulted in Billie chasing Mike with his guitar.
"Roll, roll, roll a joint, twist it at the end! Roll it up! Take a puff! Pass it to your friends!" At first it was Tre, but after a few beers, which Billie and Mike finally accepted to drink only to stop Tre nagging them, they were all singing it. Billie had never drank let alone been drunk before so this whole thing was new, but Mike and Tre had been drunk so many times that it seemed almost natural. In no less than one hour the little clearing in the woods, where Billie had first found the mushrooms, was filled with Beer bottles and muffled snoring as all 3 of the friends passed out.
Part 6:
"Oi You!" She shouted in Billie's ear, "Wake up now or I'll come into your dream and make it a nightmare". Billie woke with a start to see an angry faced girl right in front of his face. She had dark hair, long, with coloured streaks of red and green. Her face was plain with one eye of green, the other of brown. Although it was autumn all she wore was a t-shirt and dark jeans.
"You!" she screamed, "Yes you!" she answered when Billie looked unsure and uncertain.
"Yes?" his voice quivered. Although scared Billie was smitten by this fiery tempered girl.
" I work hard for weeks on end to get these fairies sober, leave for a week and come back to find some pretty boy who got them back on the beer! I hope you're proud of yourself!" The girl turned herself away from Billie to stare at Mike and Tre, still sleeping.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to... I mean they were already back on the beer before I arrived", Billie tried to explain.
"I know, sorry, just I'm annoyed with my family..." she took a deep breath "... they don't understand me; I just wish they would all go away sometimes". Billie stared at her, frustrated that she wished away the thing he wanted, a family, yet he found himself understanding.
"I'm Adie by the way"
Billie stared at Adie. Sitting in silence, staring at the two sleeping fairies that were on beds of beer bottles, Adie began to cry.
"W... w... what's wrong?" Billie stammered, unsure of whether or not he should have asked. Adie looked intently at him.
"My life's a mess... " Adie tried to explain, "It started when I had a row with my mum, she cried and Brian, my step dad... " She stopped to look at Billie's face, she knew he understood. Her sobs grew as she told Billie the rest:
"... Brian, he hit me". Billie touched her face gently where a red mark still remained. He didn't bother to mention how black her left eye was.
"What about your real dad?" Adie just looked at Billie; the answer was in her eyes.
"Just before I was born, motorbike accident... " she trailed off.
Adie glanced at Billie before at her own feet. She had just confessed her life to a complete stranger, except she felt like she had known him forever and could trust her inner thoughts and feelings with him. Adie may have felt like she knew him in her heart, but her mind told her otherwise:
"Who are you?" she enquired perplexedly. He smiled:
"Billie Joe"
Part 7:
"Awwwwwwwww", Tre commented. Billie kicked him hard.
"So where did she go?"
"You know damn well, your fake snores don't fool me", Billie stated in a matter of fact tone.
"Well I know you like her!" Billie sighed while he stared in the direction in which Mike had taken her, to show her around. Tre giggled, his pink tutu shaking, he knew he was right and so did Billie. As the giggles got louder, Billie kicked Tre really hard, the fairy went flying!
The sky was already getting dark when Mike came back. The clouds had parted to reveal a clear moon, smiling down on all of them. Billie hadn't even noticed the fairy hover back until Mike tapped him on the nose.
"Where's Adie?" Billie asked nervously, "What have you done to her?" he glanced around thinking the worst.
"Tre is right, you looooooooovvvvvvveeeeeeeee her!" Mike sang, "Anyway she's over near your guitar and stuff, seems to think it's quieter, no idea why". Billie knew why, it was because five minutes couldn't pass without Tre bursting into song, Mike would often join him.
"In the jungle... " Tre was already singing
"The Mighty Jungle... " And Mike had joined in. Their tutus shook as they tried to hula. Billie tried to hold in his laughter as the fairies danced and sang. Adie didn't try to hold in her hysteria, she may have been trying to sneak up on Billie but Tre and Mike were so funny she couldn't help laughing. Although Adie laughing could have been enough to wake the dead, Billie still was scared and screamed a loud girlish scream. Everyone went silent. Adie gaped at Billie, mouth open.
"You... you... " Adie though then smiled "... Girl!"
Adie burst into a fit of hysterics, with the mixture of Billie's scream and Tre and Mike's dance spurring on the laughter it was only a matter of time before she got hiccups and when she did Tre screamed.
"Duck, Dive, Run!!!!" he shrieked as he dived under a small bush while dragging Mike with him.
"Get off me!" Mike bellowed in Tre's ear.
"But they are coming", he whispered pointing up into the sky
"ALIENS DO NOT EXIST! ADIE HICCUPPED!" Mike roared as he pushed Tre off him and got up, wiping the dirt off his dress. Tre stared at Mike, looked offended then flew off. Mike sighed and flew off after him as his voice echoed:
"Tre!!!"
Billie laughed but for some reason Adie did not. She was staring into the trees, where a mysterious shape was coming out of the shadows. Terror was written all across her face, that Billie recognised from when he first was alone, the look he had seen in the mirror everyday. Adie gulped.
"Brian"
Part 8:
"So this is where you have been, your mother has been worried sick!" he snarled into her face, Brian looked like he was going to say something else but noticed Billie and turned away. Adie began to stutter and mumble nonsense.
"Come On", He growled, "You're going home!" He grabbed Adie by the wrist and began dragging her away from Billie. She squirmed free and ran back.
"Your mother looked after you, even when you were little! She always loved you and you repay her by running off with this!" He stared at Billie with disgust.
"What right do you think you have?" Billie replied, "You're just her redneck step dad who doesn't give a damn about her! You only want to be in her mum's good books".
"Why you little brat!" Brian screeched. His eyes grew wide and he went off balance, passing out on the floor next to Billie. Billie stared at him, on the floor. A look of bewilder-ness appeared on Billie's face
"He always does this when he's drunk, shouts then collapses". Adie sighed and sat down on a near by log. Billie put his arm around her.
"It'll be okay".
A shadow was cast over all three of them. Brian, for the first time since Billie had met him, seemed peaceful and at ease except for the bruises on his wrists, which Billie assumed were the battle scars from drunken punch, ups. It was all-familiar to Adie but to Billie it was new, he was scared. Billie had no idea what to do, whether to run or to stay, but knew he must be strong for Adie's sake
Billie stood up and kicked Brian hard in the face. He stepped back as Brian began to mumble, Adie got to her feet cautiously.
"Billie... " Adie whispered carefully, but it was too late, Brian's large fist had uncurled and it had wrapped its self Billie's leg. He wrestled Billie to the ground and in doing so pulled him self up.
"Come On! We're Going Home!" Brian bawled as he grabbed the familiar red mark on Adie's wrist, from the last time he had attempted to drag her home. Billie stood up. He was frightened both of Brian and his lack of confidence but knew he must act.
Brian was already dragging Adie away, she struggled but this tightened his grasp. He was full of anger and determination to get her home; one way or another.
"No!" Adie screamed. Billie jumped in front of Brian, he didn't know why but something in side Billie made him do this. He knew he must protect Adie.
"Get outta my way"
"Get off Adie!"
"Go be a mummy's boy and run home" laughed Brian. Caught off guard, Billie hit him.
Brian staggered back holding his now bloody nose. He looked at Billie, the rage inside him building.
"You little... " It was too late; someone had hit him with a tiny beer bottle. Shock appeared all over his face when he the direction it had come from-a fairy in a pink tutu.
"God, I must be drunk," he muttered as he staggered unsteadily off, leaving a trail of sticky blood.
"Did I miss anything?" Tre asked with a smug grin on his face.
Part 9:
"I really owe you one". Adie kept repeating these words over and over. Tre had declared himself a hero and had even made a crown out of a wrapper he had found on the floor. Bruises appeared on Adie's wrist and on Billie leg where Brian had grabbed them; Mike was happily sitting on a toadstool listening to 'How to speak fluent Italian in two weeks', no one bothered to ask why.
"To Drunkenness". After a quick toast to getting drunk Tre was on the way to becoming it and Mike was only a few bottles of beer behind.
"Wanna get drunk?" Adie had perked up again soon enough after seeing Tre and Mike samba. Billie picked up two beer bottles that Mike had made human size, cracked the tops off and began drinking.
"Contest?" Adie winked
"You are so on".
I don't know how many beers later and neither do they, but soon enough Billie began to doubt his own hearing:
"Wake Up?" Billie looked around puzzled, "Who said that?" Adie and Mike looked at each other.
"No one said anything," she answered. Billie stood up unsteadily. Again he thought he heard those words except this time they were louder and clearer. The voice was familiar, soothing; Billie knew it was from his childhood.
"Who's there?" Billie's voice shook. Adie and Mike looked around; Tre had passed out on the floor. Billie began to turn in circles, frantically searching behind everything. He knew he couldn't have imagined it.
"This is no joke", he screamed as the voice rang out again. Each time he heard the voice it was more urgent. Billie knew the voice was upset and it worried him.
He stared up into the sky, the sun shone in his eyes, blinding him.
Part 10:
"Thank God he's awake!" As the crying mother cuddled her son, she kept repeating sorry. Billie had woken up in a hospital bed surrounded by his parents and a crowd of nurses.
"We thought we'd lost you".
Billie was in shock at seeing his parents, he tried to say something but all that came out was a non-understandable language. His father ushered the nurses out of the private room and sat down on the spare chair next to Billie's mother.
"I guess we should explain".
"... Why you left?" Billie finished as his voice shook. It was his mother's time to speak:
"We ran away all those months ago... because... " She burst down in tears,
"Because... " Billie's father continued, "We thought you would be better off without us, we're terrible parents". Billie stared at his sobbing mother, then father.
"But... but... " Billie began stuttering.
"We heard about someone finding a boy passed out and we knew it was you", his mother's eyes stared into his soul. Billie felt bad that he resented his parents for leaving, but now wished he hadn't. He understood it all more clearly. No more bitterness towards his parents, for what they had done, was left.
"The... the fairies?" Billie stammered after a long silence . His parents looked at one another,
"It must be the concussion" his mother sighed. "You've been out for a week, it was all a dream".
"It wasn't! I know it wasn't!" Billie bawled. "They were real! Mike, Tre and... Adie". Both his parents looked at each other then Billie.
"I know they were", he whispered to himself.
Part 11:
By the end of the week Billie was discharged from hospital. Although his parents wanted to drive him home, Billie wanted to walk. Snow had begun to fall after the autumn Billie once knew had changed into a fresh December. The lane that he ambled down was deserted except from someone in a worn out hoodie a few paces behind him.
Once or twice Billie glanced over his shoulder, he knew the person. He assumed they were a girl, a familiar face someone he should recognise at the drop of a hat. Billie stopped.
"Adie?" he asked as he turned around. The figure had gone. Was it really Adie? It was all he could think about on his way up to the wood, his wood.
The figure was there; sat on Billie's seat. The hood had come down to reveal black hair with streaks of red and green.
"I knew it!" Billie almost cried as he ran over to hug her, "It was real!" Adie did cry:
"I thought you were dead!" Billie looked confused. Adie was too busy hugging Billie to notice until she let go, allowing him to breathe again.
"You passed out... after the drinking contest... I thought you were... " Adie didn't have to finish; Billie knew what she was talking about.
"Why weren't we invited?" Billie recognised Mike's voice and Tre's high-pitched squeal.
"Catch!" Tre grinned as he threw a couple of beer bottles to Billie and Adie.
"Welcome Home!"
Part 12:
I guess I really should of gone on to say how happy Billie was now his parents had returned and how content he was that he had great friends... but I'm not. Billie, Adie, Mike and Tre drinking beer and having fun is the ending as far as I'm concerned. But I should really tie up those loose ends, Brian moved out leaving Adie and her mum happy, Mike had learnt to speak fluent Italian and Tre... well Tre bought a pink frilly hat to match his dress... and he did this when he was sober.
Now I'm going to leave you with the image of the four friends, getting drunk, plus all of them being the happiest they have ever been!
Billie was never one of those children who fitted in. He challenged authority, rebelled against his friends and when he wasn't doing this he'd sit in the wood, the very one I told you about, playing his guitar-the only thing which kept him sane. His parents didn't care about him; he hadn't seen them since last week when they went to ASDA and never returned, they again they were never the greatest parents!
Ever since his parents left, Billie was always hungry. He was a growing boy and half the time had to go without food, this caused the start of a new hobby, searching and eating nature's delights. This became sort if a game for him, other children played scrabble and football, but Billie tested his luck with nature. Some days he would win but other days he felt like dying would be less painful.
It was during one of these games that he saw the fairies. You probably think he was drunk and saw them in some sort of blurred vision of the unknown but he would never touch a drop of alcohol. Billie was sitting on his usual tree stump when he first saw some unusual mushrooms. They were unlike anything he had seen before, grey in colour yet with a shape that was intriguing. Billie was risky and took a chance with the mushrooms.
It was that very day that Billie first heard the giggles.
"Who's there?" Billie almost whispered as he glanced around nervously, being unsure of what to think. Laughter still rang out but no one answered.
"Show yourself! I'm err... .armed!" Billie Declared as he stared at his guitar.
"Silly Boy, you could not harm us", this voice sounded so tiny and high pitched that Billie could have been dreaming. Before he had time to reply, he saw from who the voice came from.
"Damn, I look stupid!"
"At least your voice doesn't make you sound like a 3 year old GIRL!" Would you believe that two fairies had appeared before Billie?
If the idea of fairies would surprise you, their appearances would probably scare you half to death. The first fairy looked male but was wearing a blue tutu. The second fairy was also male, shorter than the first, in a frilly pink tutu. He seemed to be enjoying his outfit.
"You always have to do the 'silly boy' speech don't you, Tre?"
"Sure do, it scares the pants off them", Tre replied as confidently as one can with a squeaky tone.
"How much have you drunk?"
"Silly Mike, Not that much", Tre hiccupped then carried on with his giggles.
If anyone of you reading this now had seen these fairies you would probably walk away, making up a feeble excuse like you shouldn't have eaten that last bag of sugar, but not Billie, oh no, he picked up his guitar and began swinging it round at Mike and Tre.
His eyes grew wide, the whites showing pain. The world seemed to be spinning faster and faster till all that was left was a coloured blur and the giggles of a drunken fairy.
The next thing Billie knew, night had fallen over him like a blanket of the unknown. He was entirely unsure of whether this was a dream or not. If you have ever been in a wood in the middle of the night you will know how Billie felt, he picked up his guitar and ran home; that was if he could really call his house home anymore.
Part 2:
As Billie trudged up to the wood, his wood, rain pelted him like thousands of tiny bullets. The sky above was streamed with thick clouds, bringing a dreary mood forward in Billie's thoughts. Today he was guitar-less, his mind wandered too much to even think of playing. He knew he might see the fairies again.
It was only a hunch but he knew he didn't dream what had happened; he had a bruise to prove it, to prove the fairies were real. You are probably thinking: 'why is a boy of Billie's age looking for fairies?' Well I am still not sure and neither was he when he lumbered up to that wood on that chilly autumn morning. As his visible breath left his body he shivered before placing himself on his (now almost frozen) tree stump.
Billie was too cold to move but hungry enough to eat almost anything. His eyes darted round looking for anything within reach. It was the choice of the mushrooms, which he had eaten yesterday, or animal droppings which Billie thought must be fairly fresh by the smell which they were producing. He almost dived on the grey wonders which Billie was beginning to think were the best thing since sliced bread (something he hadn't had for weeks).
He was half way through his third mushroom when he saw something move in the corner of his eye. He spun round to be tapped on the nose with an empty beer bottle, fairy sized.
"What the... " Billie was interrupted before he could finish.
"Have we met before?" asked the beer bottle fairy, which Billie learnt yesterday, was called Tre.
"Remember, he's the guy that attacked us with his string thingy" declared the second fairy which Billie now knew as Mike.
"He attacked us with his... " Tre thought about it for a second then almost hiccupped "... his thong!" Billie stared at the two fairies, before finally uttering:
"Who are you?" He meant to say something like get away from me or I'm going crazy but he found this was all that he could say.
The two fairies were now staring at Billie, well Mike was but with Tre it was hard to tell as he had collapsed.
"I'm Mike and this drunken idiot is Tre", sighed Mike who obviously was getting tired of Tre always being drunk.
"I guess you hate him then" said Billie but with caution in his tone.
"Not always, just when he drinks all the beer and leaves none for me" laughed Mike.
"I am not drunk", slurred Tre, "I'm just a little tipsy". Billie laughed before he realised just how impossible him talking to fairies must be.
Billie turned away from Mike and Tre but neither noticed his departure from their conversation.
"I guess it's happened" he moaned, "I have finally lost my mind". Billie got up, and although it was still cold, he ran. As Billie ran out of site of the fairies Mike heaved a sigh:
"Lost another one I guess"
"You will always have meeeeeeee", these were the last words Tre managed to mumble before he passed out.
Billie couldn't stop running until he got to his house. He came to a dead halt outside and gazed at his home. It was a dump. A tear came to his eye, but Billie quickly wiped it away in case his neighbours saw his pain.
"Is this, what is meant to happen?!" He howled to no one in particular before sprinting inside to gather the few items he still cared about, his guitar, a jacket, his pen knife and a photo from when he used to be happy.
"Why do things ever have to change?" Billie cried as he engraved these words on one of the walls with his knife before running out of his house to nowhere in particular.
Part 3:
Billie had never slept rough before; he had always slept in his bed, in his house but now he had lost both. He knew that the school was after him for playing truant and soon social services would be too, Billie knew he must hide, run away from the pain, and become free. With all odds against him, Billie went to the one place, which had become his true home ever since he realised his parents didn't love him.
The rain poured down onto Billie and as the day finally died he heaved a sigh of shame, was this really the best he could do? As he sheltered underneath one of the trees, in what he liked to think of as his wood, Billie thought about what was going to become of him. He fell asleep that night with hunger in his mind.
As the sun begun to rise, high into the sky, the murmurs and snores were rising out into the wood, echoing off every tree. Billie woke abruptly to the sound of his own snores and the hunger in his stomach. He got up achingly; after all he had just spent a night on the ground, and lumbered over to the opening to in the trees, where he began his breakfast hunt. Billie snorted and gazed up to the sky:
"Great, just what I need", he barked sarcastically, 'A storm'. Billie actually said a lot more, but it's too rude for this story.
He began scoffing down some berries which had fallen from a small bush, sheltered from the oncoming storm by the trees, which towered high above. Many of you will know how good berries taste but you will also know how they do not kill your hunger. Billie gazed around, mumbling to himself:
"Leaf, leaf, grass... " He squinted, trying to get a better look to make sure that they were real, before he yelled "... MUSHROOMS!!"
He dived onto the cluster and immediately began stuffing his face with the delights which he had found! Billie began to feel woozy and sick. He stared at the grey spindly trunks of the mushrooms, leaning back against the nearest tree to tilt his head backwards to stare up at the sky through the leafless branches. The pain that was striking Billie was unbearable.
"I'm going to die", he thought to himself as he lost the ability and will to stay awake.
Part 4:
"Is he dead?" Tre asked Mike.
"Nah, he's breathing" Mike replied although his voice quivered with fear. Tre picked up a long stick and poked Billie in the eye not realising that it had now opened. Both Mike and Tre jumped back as Billie began swearing and swiping out. Although it did not take Billie long before he could see out of his eye again, he was still in agony.
Mike and Tre stared back. It was one of those moments that if you were watching, a tear would come to your eye (yes it really was that beautiful) well that is until Tre, still holding the stick, prodded Billie's other eye. Billie began rolling on the floor, screaming words, which I would rather not repeat.
"Tre?" whispered Mike,
"Yes?" Tre whispered back for no reason
"DO THAT ONE MORE TIME AND I WILL PULL OUT YOUR EYES AND MAKE YOU EAT THEM!" Even Billie stopped screaming in pain at hearing such a loud voice come out of such a tiny fairy. Mike had gone such a shade of red that you would find it hard to find a rosier apple.
A long eerie silence followed the screaming and shouting. Billie had two blood shot eyes, Mike had snapped Tre's twig in half and Tre was on his hands and knees crying over the death of 'Mr Sticky'. It was Billie who finally decided to break the silence
"I guess you must be real then, I mean I can't imagine getting hurt... ' he paused, '... well at least not to that extent.".
"Of course we're real! Why wouldn't we be?" Mike responded. Billie was too ashamed to look Mike in the eye but he managed to be able to glance at Tre, who had turned to drinking over the death of his beloved stick, Billie didn't even bother asking-he knew Tre was one crazy fairy.
After Tre's 12th bottle, Billie thought he must do something. Mike had flown off to get Billie some food, after he claimed the mushrooms were poisonous-which would explain quite a lot.
"You are one pretty oompa loompa", Tre garbled till Billie made the very smart and reasonable idea of gagging him with a spare cloth he had in his pocket and binding him to the nearest toadstool with a spare guitar string. Tre of course, found the cloth very tasty! At the same time as Tre eating the cloth, Billie sat down with his guitar, strumming random chords and notes, waiting till Mike returned.
Billie wasn't sure whether to eat the cake, or the honey or anyone of the other sugary snacks, which Mike had returned with, first! The sweet nectar of caramel ran down Billie's throat (not to mention his face), the biscuits and buns left crumbs on his clothes and for the first time in a long while he was happy. To Billie, Mike had become a friend, he felt like he could trust this fairy, which had once scared and confused him.
"This is my home from now on, no matter what", Billie said out loud to himself in a proud tone. Mike agreed and it wasn't long before the drunken Tre managed to get a word in:
"Welcome To Paradise!"
Part 5:
I wish I could start this part by telling you that Billie's parents had returned and they had moved into a mansion with Mike and Tre and lived happily ever after (following Tre's release from rehab). I'm sorry to say that I can not. Billie still hasn't been reunited with his parents and all 3 are still homeless, as for the rehab centre, well if these three keep on drinking as they have started they will all need it in a few days.
Billie never thought this would become of him, when he was little he dreamt of becoming a famous rock star, having fun with his parents. Mike always had thought he would invent something, which would change the world, and become rich, while Tre always believed he would be a friendless drunken hobo, so the life he was living now was better than he expected!
"Beer anyone?" asked Tre as he handed them round. Billie and Mike declined.
"Suit yourself". Tre sat down on a toadstool and began drinking the beers which he had just offered round. It didn't take Tre long before he became as drunken as the day he first met Billie:
"Row, row, row you boat!!!!!!!!!!!" He began singing completely out of tune "Gently down the stream!!!!!! Something... something... something". He went silent for a minute, drinking another bottle down.
Mike stared at his two friends, Tre drinking whilst Billie tried to start a fire. He never bothered telling Billie that he could start one with his wand; it was fun to watch Billie struggle. Sure Billie had the base of the fire; he just couldn't actually light it. First he tried stones, then sticks then even Tre's empty beer bottles. It wasn't long before Billie lost his temper and Mike had to confess that he could do the task which Billie had tried to complete for so long. This resulted in Billie chasing Mike with his guitar.
"Roll, roll, roll a joint, twist it at the end! Roll it up! Take a puff! Pass it to your friends!" At first it was Tre, but after a few beers, which Billie and Mike finally accepted to drink only to stop Tre nagging them, they were all singing it. Billie had never drank let alone been drunk before so this whole thing was new, but Mike and Tre had been drunk so many times that it seemed almost natural. In no less than one hour the little clearing in the woods, where Billie had first found the mushrooms, was filled with Beer bottles and muffled snoring as all 3 of the friends passed out.
Part 6:
"Oi You!" She shouted in Billie's ear, "Wake up now or I'll come into your dream and make it a nightmare". Billie woke with a start to see an angry faced girl right in front of his face. She had dark hair, long, with coloured streaks of red and green. Her face was plain with one eye of green, the other of brown. Although it was autumn all she wore was a t-shirt and dark jeans.
"You!" she screamed, "Yes you!" she answered when Billie looked unsure and uncertain.
"Yes?" his voice quivered. Although scared Billie was smitten by this fiery tempered girl.
" I work hard for weeks on end to get these fairies sober, leave for a week and come back to find some pretty boy who got them back on the beer! I hope you're proud of yourself!" The girl turned herself away from Billie to stare at Mike and Tre, still sleeping.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to... I mean they were already back on the beer before I arrived", Billie tried to explain.
"I know, sorry, just I'm annoyed with my family..." she took a deep breath "... they don't understand me; I just wish they would all go away sometimes". Billie stared at her, frustrated that she wished away the thing he wanted, a family, yet he found himself understanding.
"I'm Adie by the way"
Billie stared at Adie. Sitting in silence, staring at the two sleeping fairies that were on beds of beer bottles, Adie began to cry.
"W... w... what's wrong?" Billie stammered, unsure of whether or not he should have asked. Adie looked intently at him.
"My life's a mess... " Adie tried to explain, "It started when I had a row with my mum, she cried and Brian, my step dad... " She stopped to look at Billie's face, she knew he understood. Her sobs grew as she told Billie the rest:
"... Brian, he hit me". Billie touched her face gently where a red mark still remained. He didn't bother to mention how black her left eye was.
"What about your real dad?" Adie just looked at Billie; the answer was in her eyes.
"Just before I was born, motorbike accident... " she trailed off.
Adie glanced at Billie before at her own feet. She had just confessed her life to a complete stranger, except she felt like she had known him forever and could trust her inner thoughts and feelings with him. Adie may have felt like she knew him in her heart, but her mind told her otherwise:
"Who are you?" she enquired perplexedly. He smiled:
"Billie Joe"
Part 7:
"Awwwwwwwww", Tre commented. Billie kicked him hard.
"So where did she go?"
"You know damn well, your fake snores don't fool me", Billie stated in a matter of fact tone.
"Well I know you like her!" Billie sighed while he stared in the direction in which Mike had taken her, to show her around. Tre giggled, his pink tutu shaking, he knew he was right and so did Billie. As the giggles got louder, Billie kicked Tre really hard, the fairy went flying!
The sky was already getting dark when Mike came back. The clouds had parted to reveal a clear moon, smiling down on all of them. Billie hadn't even noticed the fairy hover back until Mike tapped him on the nose.
"Where's Adie?" Billie asked nervously, "What have you done to her?" he glanced around thinking the worst.
"Tre is right, you looooooooovvvvvvveeeeeeeee her!" Mike sang, "Anyway she's over near your guitar and stuff, seems to think it's quieter, no idea why". Billie knew why, it was because five minutes couldn't pass without Tre bursting into song, Mike would often join him.
"In the jungle... " Tre was already singing
"The Mighty Jungle... " And Mike had joined in. Their tutus shook as they tried to hula. Billie tried to hold in his laughter as the fairies danced and sang. Adie didn't try to hold in her hysteria, she may have been trying to sneak up on Billie but Tre and Mike were so funny she couldn't help laughing. Although Adie laughing could have been enough to wake the dead, Billie still was scared and screamed a loud girlish scream. Everyone went silent. Adie gaped at Billie, mouth open.
"You... you... " Adie though then smiled "... Girl!"
Adie burst into a fit of hysterics, with the mixture of Billie's scream and Tre and Mike's dance spurring on the laughter it was only a matter of time before she got hiccups and when she did Tre screamed.
"Duck, Dive, Run!!!!" he shrieked as he dived under a small bush while dragging Mike with him.
"Get off me!" Mike bellowed in Tre's ear.
"But they are coming", he whispered pointing up into the sky
"ALIENS DO NOT EXIST! ADIE HICCUPPED!" Mike roared as he pushed Tre off him and got up, wiping the dirt off his dress. Tre stared at Mike, looked offended then flew off. Mike sighed and flew off after him as his voice echoed:
"Tre!!!"
Billie laughed but for some reason Adie did not. She was staring into the trees, where a mysterious shape was coming out of the shadows. Terror was written all across her face, that Billie recognised from when he first was alone, the look he had seen in the mirror everyday. Adie gulped.
"Brian"
Part 8:
"So this is where you have been, your mother has been worried sick!" he snarled into her face, Brian looked like he was going to say something else but noticed Billie and turned away. Adie began to stutter and mumble nonsense.
"Come On", He growled, "You're going home!" He grabbed Adie by the wrist and began dragging her away from Billie. She squirmed free and ran back.
"Your mother looked after you, even when you were little! She always loved you and you repay her by running off with this!" He stared at Billie with disgust.
"What right do you think you have?" Billie replied, "You're just her redneck step dad who doesn't give a damn about her! You only want to be in her mum's good books".
"Why you little brat!" Brian screeched. His eyes grew wide and he went off balance, passing out on the floor next to Billie. Billie stared at him, on the floor. A look of bewilder-ness appeared on Billie's face
"He always does this when he's drunk, shouts then collapses". Adie sighed and sat down on a near by log. Billie put his arm around her.
"It'll be okay".
A shadow was cast over all three of them. Brian, for the first time since Billie had met him, seemed peaceful and at ease except for the bruises on his wrists, which Billie assumed were the battle scars from drunken punch, ups. It was all-familiar to Adie but to Billie it was new, he was scared. Billie had no idea what to do, whether to run or to stay, but knew he must be strong for Adie's sake
Billie stood up and kicked Brian hard in the face. He stepped back as Brian began to mumble, Adie got to her feet cautiously.
"Billie... " Adie whispered carefully, but it was too late, Brian's large fist had uncurled and it had wrapped its self Billie's leg. He wrestled Billie to the ground and in doing so pulled him self up.
"Come On! We're Going Home!" Brian bawled as he grabbed the familiar red mark on Adie's wrist, from the last time he had attempted to drag her home. Billie stood up. He was frightened both of Brian and his lack of confidence but knew he must act.
Brian was already dragging Adie away, she struggled but this tightened his grasp. He was full of anger and determination to get her home; one way or another.
"No!" Adie screamed. Billie jumped in front of Brian, he didn't know why but something in side Billie made him do this. He knew he must protect Adie.
"Get outta my way"
"Get off Adie!"
"Go be a mummy's boy and run home" laughed Brian. Caught off guard, Billie hit him.
Brian staggered back holding his now bloody nose. He looked at Billie, the rage inside him building.
"You little... " It was too late; someone had hit him with a tiny beer bottle. Shock appeared all over his face when he the direction it had come from-a fairy in a pink tutu.
"God, I must be drunk," he muttered as he staggered unsteadily off, leaving a trail of sticky blood.
"Did I miss anything?" Tre asked with a smug grin on his face.
Part 9:
"I really owe you one". Adie kept repeating these words over and over. Tre had declared himself a hero and had even made a crown out of a wrapper he had found on the floor. Bruises appeared on Adie's wrist and on Billie leg where Brian had grabbed them; Mike was happily sitting on a toadstool listening to 'How to speak fluent Italian in two weeks', no one bothered to ask why.
"To Drunkenness". After a quick toast to getting drunk Tre was on the way to becoming it and Mike was only a few bottles of beer behind.
"Wanna get drunk?" Adie had perked up again soon enough after seeing Tre and Mike samba. Billie picked up two beer bottles that Mike had made human size, cracked the tops off and began drinking.
"Contest?" Adie winked
"You are so on".
I don't know how many beers later and neither do they, but soon enough Billie began to doubt his own hearing:
"Wake Up?" Billie looked around puzzled, "Who said that?" Adie and Mike looked at each other.
"No one said anything," she answered. Billie stood up unsteadily. Again he thought he heard those words except this time they were louder and clearer. The voice was familiar, soothing; Billie knew it was from his childhood.
"Who's there?" Billie's voice shook. Adie and Mike looked around; Tre had passed out on the floor. Billie began to turn in circles, frantically searching behind everything. He knew he couldn't have imagined it.
"This is no joke", he screamed as the voice rang out again. Each time he heard the voice it was more urgent. Billie knew the voice was upset and it worried him.
He stared up into the sky, the sun shone in his eyes, blinding him.
Part 10:
"Thank God he's awake!" As the crying mother cuddled her son, she kept repeating sorry. Billie had woken up in a hospital bed surrounded by his parents and a crowd of nurses.
"We thought we'd lost you".
Billie was in shock at seeing his parents, he tried to say something but all that came out was a non-understandable language. His father ushered the nurses out of the private room and sat down on the spare chair next to Billie's mother.
"I guess we should explain".
"... Why you left?" Billie finished as his voice shook. It was his mother's time to speak:
"We ran away all those months ago... because... " She burst down in tears,
"Because... " Billie's father continued, "We thought you would be better off without us, we're terrible parents". Billie stared at his sobbing mother, then father.
"But... but... " Billie began stuttering.
"We heard about someone finding a boy passed out and we knew it was you", his mother's eyes stared into his soul. Billie felt bad that he resented his parents for leaving, but now wished he hadn't. He understood it all more clearly. No more bitterness towards his parents, for what they had done, was left.
"The... the fairies?" Billie stammered after a long silence . His parents looked at one another,
"It must be the concussion" his mother sighed. "You've been out for a week, it was all a dream".
"It wasn't! I know it wasn't!" Billie bawled. "They were real! Mike, Tre and... Adie". Both his parents looked at each other then Billie.
"I know they were", he whispered to himself.
Part 11:
By the end of the week Billie was discharged from hospital. Although his parents wanted to drive him home, Billie wanted to walk. Snow had begun to fall after the autumn Billie once knew had changed into a fresh December. The lane that he ambled down was deserted except from someone in a worn out hoodie a few paces behind him.
Once or twice Billie glanced over his shoulder, he knew the person. He assumed they were a girl, a familiar face someone he should recognise at the drop of a hat. Billie stopped.
"Adie?" he asked as he turned around. The figure had gone. Was it really Adie? It was all he could think about on his way up to the wood, his wood.
The figure was there; sat on Billie's seat. The hood had come down to reveal black hair with streaks of red and green.
"I knew it!" Billie almost cried as he ran over to hug her, "It was real!" Adie did cry:
"I thought you were dead!" Billie looked confused. Adie was too busy hugging Billie to notice until she let go, allowing him to breathe again.
"You passed out... after the drinking contest... I thought you were... " Adie didn't have to finish; Billie knew what she was talking about.
"Why weren't we invited?" Billie recognised Mike's voice and Tre's high-pitched squeal.
"Catch!" Tre grinned as he threw a couple of beer bottles to Billie and Adie.
"Welcome Home!"
Part 12:
I guess I really should of gone on to say how happy Billie was now his parents had returned and how content he was that he had great friends... but I'm not. Billie, Adie, Mike and Tre drinking beer and having fun is the ending as far as I'm concerned. But I should really tie up those loose ends, Brian moved out leaving Adie and her mum happy, Mike had learnt to speak fluent Italian and Tre... well Tre bought a pink frilly hat to match his dress... and he did this when he was sober.
Now I'm going to leave you with the image of the four friends, getting drunk, plus all of them being the happiest they have ever been!
