Never Say Forever 'Cause Nothing Lasts, chapter 6
Billie Joe lay on the bed in silence.
His heart was broken...
He glanced over at his backpack on the floor and sighed. He stood up and dropped down next to it. Reaching in, right at the bottom, he found the small book of thoughts. Smiling weakly, he pulled it out, sat on the bed and opened his diary. The black pen shook in his hand. Tears welled up inside the teenager's eyes. He lowered the pen and slowly wrote his entry.
Hey Diary,
Yeah, I didn't insult you...and there's a very good reason for that.
Tré is going out with Whatsername.
Tears leaked from Billie's eyes onto the pages of the book, but he continued anyway, desperate to vent the pain in his heart.
I waited too long. Why didn't I just tell her when I had the chance? I'm such a fucking idiot! The thing is, I know Tré will take care of her, but I'm always going to hate myself because I never told her how I feel. She deserves to know just how special she is. How can she be going out with Tré? I'm the one who knows her mom and stepdad hit her. I'm the one who understands her. I'm the one who loves her. Why did I have to be such a fucking Dumbass?! I could've told her anytime at all! But now it's too late. She's with Tré and he will never give her up. EVER!! Even if he did, he would feel like shit if I went out with her afterwards.
Whatsername would probably think I was just using her to piss him off. It would feel weird.
So now, I will never be able to be with the girl of my dreams.
Life sucks.
- BJ </3
Without warning, the door swung open. Before Billie could hide the book, Mike came in, "Hey Bill, I... Are you...crying?"
"No!" Billie quickly wiped the tears away on his sleeves and forced a smile.
Mike sighed and sat down next to his best friend, "Wassup?"
Billie remained quiet and closed the diary on his lap.
"You love her?" Mike asked quietly.
Billie looked up and his gaze was caught in Mike's. Slowly, painfully, he nodded.
Mike sighed, "Yeah I know, man."
Billie cocked his head to one side.
"You've been staring at her. Whenever she's brought up in conversation, you get that dreamy smile."
He clicked his fingers in front of Billie's face. Billie shot back to reality and looked very guilty, "Sorry..."
"You write about her. You dream about her. You think about her every moment of your life, don't you?" Mike asked quietly.
Billie began to shake his head, but it almost instantly turned into a nod and tears flowed over his face.
"I- I- I love... " Billie stuttered, "I love her. But...she's Tré's. If he finds out, how will he feel? Or Whatsername for that matter? I don't want to destroy our friendships but... I don't want to lose the girl of my dreams. What do I do Mike?"
Mike shook his head, "I don't know. I just don't know. Try not to let it get you down, man. Just...don't let a girl become your life."
Billie nodded his head slowly, breaking eye contact, "I think I need to be alone right now."
Mike, reluctantly, nodded and stood up. He left Billie alone in the room and shut the door quietly.
Billie Joe lay on the bed in silence.
His heart was broken...
***
A girl walked along the moonlit street with a bag and a guitar. She glanced over shoulder and saw to her shock... no one was there. She turned and ran back, re-tracing her steps over the hill, where she found a small girl, no older than four years old, sitting on the pavement with her legs pulled up to her chest and a backpack by her side.
"Whatsername!" The four year old whined, "My legs hurt! I can't walk."
Whatsername gazed down at Alex and groaned, bending down and picking up her little sister, she mumbled, "I'll only carry you once."
She turned and kept walking along the street through the night as thick raindrops hit the street. Weak, tired, hurt, and cradling a small girl in her arms...
***
"Whatsername? What the hell are you doing here?" Tré asked in astonishment when he opened the door to see his girlfriend on the front step with her bag, guitar and a sleeping four year old in her arms.
"I couldn't stand being away from you any longer!" Whatsername replied sarcastically and rolled her eyes. "I left. I'm never going back to that shithole I once called home."
Tré stood aside to let her in. Whatsername gave him a quick kiss on the cheek as she passed. Alex stirred in her arms.
"W-Where...where are we?" She mumbled blearily with a yawn.
"Shhhh... it's okay Al. Just relax, okay?" Whatsername soothed.
Alex nodded and fell asleep again almost instantly.
"So...can we stay here?" Whatsername asked Tré, "Not permanently... just 'till we can find somewhere to live."
Tré bit his bottom lip, "I'm fine with you staying here for as long as you want, I'm actually really happy about it, but...Billie Joe and Mike are here for the night and that means there's only one spare bed."
Whatsername grinned cheekily, "Alex can sleep there and I'll... " She gave him a kiss.
Tré grinned at her. Billie walked into the room and just stared at Whatsername.
Her black hair was wet from the soft patter of rain that had begun to fall about half and hour ago. Her shirt was soaked, making it stick to her body and follow her curves. She wasn't fat, or a stick. Just in between. Her baggy jeans had gone from blue to black with water and she looked exhausted. Yet, her waterproof eyeliner had remained perfect. The girl in her arms was fast asleep and Whatsername was kissing Tré, forcing pain to surge from Billie Joe's heart through every inch of his body.
Whatsername pulled away from Tré, who took the four year old upstairs to the spare room, where she slept soundly. Whatsername smiled at Billie and dumped her bags and guitar on the floor. She walked up to him and hugged him. Billie dropped into a state of blissfully unawareness. All he could think of was the girl with her arms wrapped around him.
"What're you doing here?" Billie asked quietly, not letting go of her.
"I ran away," Whatsername whispered. Billie could hear the misery in her voice, and the tears dripping onto neck and she rested her head on his shoulder, "My mom and Brad were too much, so I left. I couldn't leave Alex there. She may be Brad and Mom's daughter, but no one deserves that sort of life. No one."
Billie didn't want to let go, but he wanted to see her face. Gently, he pushed her away and smiled at her. Then he spotted the cut on her cheek, surrounded by dried blood.
"C'mon, let's get that cleaned up," He said and pulled her upstairs towards the bathroom.
She winced as he washed warm water over the slit.
"Stings?" He asked.
Whatsername nodded briefly. He smiled sympathetically at her and continued his work.
Once the blood was gone, the wound didn't look so bad. Whatsername smiled and gave Billie a quick kiss of appreciation as she walked past. Billie felt himself blush. He grinned uncontrollably. Billie stayed in the bathroom until his face had returned to normal, then jogged down the stairs to be met by a collection of blankets and pillows.
"What the?" He muttered.
"Fire!!" A voice called.
A shoe was thrown and hit Billie on the head.
"OW!! That really hurt! I'm gonna have a lump there, you idiot! Who throws a shoe? Honestly! You fight like a woman!" Billie yelled in annoyance.
"That'll explain a few things!" The voice laughed.
"What the fuck? Whatsername? Jane?" Billie was confused.
Another shoe was thrown out, followed by two more, all hitting Billie.
"Shit! We're outta ammo!" One voice said.
"What do we do?" Another sounded worried.
"Give in! You're surrounded!" Tré yelled as he and Mike ran up to the fort and circled it.
"We shall never surrender!!" Whatsername shouted from inside the fort.
"Oh yeah?" Mike said.
"Yeah!" Jane's voice called back.
"What if I were to do... THIS?!" Tré jumped on the fort throwing the pillows aside until he found Whatsername and Jane looking scared and hiding underneath a blanket.
Whatsername screamed as Tre picked her up and slung her over both shoulders so as she was lying sideways.
"C'mon Mike! Retreat! We have a hostage!!" Tré shouted and ran into the next room.
Jane threw pillows at Mike, "You! Evil! Destroyed my fort! Fuck you, Mike!!" She pretended to cry.
Mike, thinking she was really crying, dropped down next to her. He liked Jane, but was too nervous to tell her. Jane peeked at him through her fingers and smirked to herself. She grabbed a blanket and dropped it over Mike's head, then pushed him over and leapt to her feet.
"Comrade! I shall save you!" Jane yelled and ran through the door, which Tré had disappeared with Whatsername.
"EEEEEWW!!" Jane yelled and ran back, hiding behind Billie Joe, "Get a room you two!!"
"We're in a room." Tré shouted form the next room.
"But do ya have to make out ALL the time?" Jane shouted.
It wasn't making Billie Joe feel any better about his thing for Whatsername.
Tré and Whatsername came through from the next room, looking very proud of themselves. Jane rolled her eyes and walked into the kitchen. She came backwards and threw an object at Whatsername, hitting her right in the nose.
"OW!!" Whatsername wiped chocolate icing off her nose, "Who throws a cupcake? Honestly!"
His heart was broken...
He glanced over at his backpack on the floor and sighed. He stood up and dropped down next to it. Reaching in, right at the bottom, he found the small book of thoughts. Smiling weakly, he pulled it out, sat on the bed and opened his diary. The black pen shook in his hand. Tears welled up inside the teenager's eyes. He lowered the pen and slowly wrote his entry.
Hey Diary,
Yeah, I didn't insult you...and there's a very good reason for that.
Tré is going out with Whatsername.
Tears leaked from Billie's eyes onto the pages of the book, but he continued anyway, desperate to vent the pain in his heart.
I waited too long. Why didn't I just tell her when I had the chance? I'm such a fucking idiot! The thing is, I know Tré will take care of her, but I'm always going to hate myself because I never told her how I feel. She deserves to know just how special she is. How can she be going out with Tré? I'm the one who knows her mom and stepdad hit her. I'm the one who understands her. I'm the one who loves her. Why did I have to be such a fucking Dumbass?! I could've told her anytime at all! But now it's too late. She's with Tré and he will never give her up. EVER!! Even if he did, he would feel like shit if I went out with her afterwards.
Whatsername would probably think I was just using her to piss him off. It would feel weird.
So now, I will never be able to be with the girl of my dreams.
Life sucks.
- BJ </3
Without warning, the door swung open. Before Billie could hide the book, Mike came in, "Hey Bill, I... Are you...crying?"
"No!" Billie quickly wiped the tears away on his sleeves and forced a smile.
Mike sighed and sat down next to his best friend, "Wassup?"
Billie remained quiet and closed the diary on his lap.
"You love her?" Mike asked quietly.
Billie looked up and his gaze was caught in Mike's. Slowly, painfully, he nodded.
Mike sighed, "Yeah I know, man."
Billie cocked his head to one side.
"You've been staring at her. Whenever she's brought up in conversation, you get that dreamy smile."
He clicked his fingers in front of Billie's face. Billie shot back to reality and looked very guilty, "Sorry..."
"You write about her. You dream about her. You think about her every moment of your life, don't you?" Mike asked quietly.
Billie began to shake his head, but it almost instantly turned into a nod and tears flowed over his face.
"I- I- I love... " Billie stuttered, "I love her. But...she's Tré's. If he finds out, how will he feel? Or Whatsername for that matter? I don't want to destroy our friendships but... I don't want to lose the girl of my dreams. What do I do Mike?"
Mike shook his head, "I don't know. I just don't know. Try not to let it get you down, man. Just...don't let a girl become your life."
Billie nodded his head slowly, breaking eye contact, "I think I need to be alone right now."
Mike, reluctantly, nodded and stood up. He left Billie alone in the room and shut the door quietly.
Billie Joe lay on the bed in silence.
His heart was broken...
***
A girl walked along the moonlit street with a bag and a guitar. She glanced over shoulder and saw to her shock... no one was there. She turned and ran back, re-tracing her steps over the hill, where she found a small girl, no older than four years old, sitting on the pavement with her legs pulled up to her chest and a backpack by her side.
"Whatsername!" The four year old whined, "My legs hurt! I can't walk."
Whatsername gazed down at Alex and groaned, bending down and picking up her little sister, she mumbled, "I'll only carry you once."
She turned and kept walking along the street through the night as thick raindrops hit the street. Weak, tired, hurt, and cradling a small girl in her arms...
***
"Whatsername? What the hell are you doing here?" Tré asked in astonishment when he opened the door to see his girlfriend on the front step with her bag, guitar and a sleeping four year old in her arms.
"I couldn't stand being away from you any longer!" Whatsername replied sarcastically and rolled her eyes. "I left. I'm never going back to that shithole I once called home."
Tré stood aside to let her in. Whatsername gave him a quick kiss on the cheek as she passed. Alex stirred in her arms.
"W-Where...where are we?" She mumbled blearily with a yawn.
"Shhhh... it's okay Al. Just relax, okay?" Whatsername soothed.
Alex nodded and fell asleep again almost instantly.
"So...can we stay here?" Whatsername asked Tré, "Not permanently... just 'till we can find somewhere to live."
Tré bit his bottom lip, "I'm fine with you staying here for as long as you want, I'm actually really happy about it, but...Billie Joe and Mike are here for the night and that means there's only one spare bed."
Whatsername grinned cheekily, "Alex can sleep there and I'll... " She gave him a kiss.
Tré grinned at her. Billie walked into the room and just stared at Whatsername.
Her black hair was wet from the soft patter of rain that had begun to fall about half and hour ago. Her shirt was soaked, making it stick to her body and follow her curves. She wasn't fat, or a stick. Just in between. Her baggy jeans had gone from blue to black with water and she looked exhausted. Yet, her waterproof eyeliner had remained perfect. The girl in her arms was fast asleep and Whatsername was kissing Tré, forcing pain to surge from Billie Joe's heart through every inch of his body.
Whatsername pulled away from Tré, who took the four year old upstairs to the spare room, where she slept soundly. Whatsername smiled at Billie and dumped her bags and guitar on the floor. She walked up to him and hugged him. Billie dropped into a state of blissfully unawareness. All he could think of was the girl with her arms wrapped around him.
"What're you doing here?" Billie asked quietly, not letting go of her.
"I ran away," Whatsername whispered. Billie could hear the misery in her voice, and the tears dripping onto neck and she rested her head on his shoulder, "My mom and Brad were too much, so I left. I couldn't leave Alex there. She may be Brad and Mom's daughter, but no one deserves that sort of life. No one."
Billie didn't want to let go, but he wanted to see her face. Gently, he pushed her away and smiled at her. Then he spotted the cut on her cheek, surrounded by dried blood.
"C'mon, let's get that cleaned up," He said and pulled her upstairs towards the bathroom.
She winced as he washed warm water over the slit.
"Stings?" He asked.
Whatsername nodded briefly. He smiled sympathetically at her and continued his work.
Once the blood was gone, the wound didn't look so bad. Whatsername smiled and gave Billie a quick kiss of appreciation as she walked past. Billie felt himself blush. He grinned uncontrollably. Billie stayed in the bathroom until his face had returned to normal, then jogged down the stairs to be met by a collection of blankets and pillows.
"What the?" He muttered.
"Fire!!" A voice called.
A shoe was thrown and hit Billie on the head.
"OW!! That really hurt! I'm gonna have a lump there, you idiot! Who throws a shoe? Honestly! You fight like a woman!" Billie yelled in annoyance.
"That'll explain a few things!" The voice laughed.
"What the fuck? Whatsername? Jane?" Billie was confused.
Another shoe was thrown out, followed by two more, all hitting Billie.
"Shit! We're outta ammo!" One voice said.
"What do we do?" Another sounded worried.
"Give in! You're surrounded!" Tré yelled as he and Mike ran up to the fort and circled it.
"We shall never surrender!!" Whatsername shouted from inside the fort.
"Oh yeah?" Mike said.
"Yeah!" Jane's voice called back.
"What if I were to do... THIS?!" Tré jumped on the fort throwing the pillows aside until he found Whatsername and Jane looking scared and hiding underneath a blanket.
Whatsername screamed as Tre picked her up and slung her over both shoulders so as she was lying sideways.
"C'mon Mike! Retreat! We have a hostage!!" Tré shouted and ran into the next room.
Jane threw pillows at Mike, "You! Evil! Destroyed my fort! Fuck you, Mike!!" She pretended to cry.
Mike, thinking she was really crying, dropped down next to her. He liked Jane, but was too nervous to tell her. Jane peeked at him through her fingers and smirked to herself. She grabbed a blanket and dropped it over Mike's head, then pushed him over and leapt to her feet.
"Comrade! I shall save you!" Jane yelled and ran through the door, which Tré had disappeared with Whatsername.
"EEEEEWW!!" Jane yelled and ran back, hiding behind Billie Joe, "Get a room you two!!"
"We're in a room." Tré shouted form the next room.
"But do ya have to make out ALL the time?" Jane shouted.
It wasn't making Billie Joe feel any better about his thing for Whatsername.
Tré and Whatsername came through from the next room, looking very proud of themselves. Jane rolled her eyes and walked into the kitchen. She came backwards and threw an object at Whatsername, hitting her right in the nose.
"OW!!" Whatsername wiped chocolate icing off her nose, "Who throws a cupcake? Honestly!"
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