Man I am bad at trying to cheer people up!

WARNING:BAD SPELLER, DO NOT COMMENT ON POOR SPELLING

It's so true! I'm not good at being nice or conforting but, when it comes to being funny I can do it. Whenever somthing really bad happens to someone I know I'm always the first to try the whole "laughter is the best medicine/anti-depressent" idea. It almost always backfires. Sometimes I just try strait out smartass:

Sad Person: My cat just died.
Me: Well gee that sucks massive donkey balls! What are you going to do with the body, give it to the poor for food?
Sad Person: *Bursts into tears*
Someone Else In Crowd: NICE JOB ASSHOLE!

If you think I'm bad at the smartass approach you should her me on the optimictic approach. It's not that I'm overly bad at it, I just can't recover from a backfire:

Sad Person: My uncle just told me my cousin died.
Me: Hey I'm sorry man, at least you got told about it right away.
Sad Person: He died 2 weeks ago and I just found out *bursts into tears*
Someone Else In Crowd: NICE JOB ASSHOLE!

Of couse lets never forget the ever-so-clever-walk-away:

Sad Person: My cat just died.
Me: *Backs away slowly and casualy*
Someone Else In Crowd: WHERE DO YOU THINK YOUR GOING ASSHOLE!?

Every time somthing bad happens to someone I some way or another end up in one of those smacking your palm on your forehead situations that we all get one time or another. It's not that I'm unsimpathetic about the shit that happens in other's lives, I'd just rather it never comes up for both their and my sake.
Posted on June 22nd, 2007 at 11:38pm

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