Peer Pressure: Am I making the right choice?
I hate that. People that call themselves your friends try to make you do the things you don't want to do , and I'm not talking about alcohol, drugs and sex. I'm talking about destroying another persons life, ever since I told my friends that I was going to stick around for my baby they have treated me less and less like one of them.
They think I am going to trade in my mohawk and boots for nappy's and bottles, and for a while I am because me and my girlfriend want to make this work. But we have no support.
Both our parents don't agree on us raising this baby without being married, they want us to do everything the right way. But what does a ring and a piece of paper have to do with showing love, we don't want that but we are being forced in to it.
My mates keep telling me that I am selling out for being a dad, and to be honest Its all I've ever dreamed off is being a dad and being in a stable realtionship but they can't seem to understand that. They have explained all the bad things and I've thought about all the good things, but their voices are louder than mine and I have to think Am I making the right choice?
These are the options which I was asked to choose by them, and I can't.
Leave her and the baby
pay for a termination
play at happy families
or loose my mates.
They think I am going to trade in my mohawk and boots for nappy's and bottles, and for a while I am because me and my girlfriend want to make this work. But we have no support.
Both our parents don't agree on us raising this baby without being married, they want us to do everything the right way. But what does a ring and a piece of paper have to do with showing love, we don't want that but we are being forced in to it.
My mates keep telling me that I am selling out for being a dad, and to be honest Its all I've ever dreamed off is being a dad and being in a stable realtionship but they can't seem to understand that. They have explained all the bad things and I've thought about all the good things, but their voices are louder than mine and I have to think Am I making the right choice?
These are the options which I was asked to choose by them, and I can't.
Leave her and the baby
pay for a termination
play at happy families
or loose my mates.
if they r really ur friends they will help u threw this....not b ass holes about it..nd i think u should keep the baby nd ur gf...nd dont get married till u r ready...if u do it right away..u will end up like my parents...dont listen 2 ur friends (this sounds corny but..) follow ur heart....u have a life 2 live...dont let ur "friends" f*ck it up...uhh nd just my opinon..idt u should have a baby till ur married...but thats just my point a view...
-Taylor
x0x0x0x, August 1st, 2007 at 01:37:08pm
They're not really friends at all if they dont support you with something like this. and its got nothing to do with them. You're still going to have time for them. And its YOUR BABY, to be honest, your child comes before your friends...
And about your parents, it's your choice, not theirs. whats done is done, and nothing can change that. Your parents can support you and give advice on what to do, but they can't make choices for you...
It'll all work out though =]
Teh munkeh, July 30th, 2007 at 03:14:59pm
Don't leave the baby.
Your friends should understand.
If you lose them because of the fact that you want to act responseble, you don't need them.
You'll get new friends after a while, that will respect what you did.
=] I think it's great that you want to take care of it.
Lykwoah, July 30th, 2007 at 02:11:03pm
Friends Come And Go.
Children Are Forever.
Tholomew Plague, July 30th, 2007 at 12:00:09pm
dont leave the kid.
kids NEED their dad.
Arabia FUCK YEAH., July 30th, 2007 at 08:55:28am
Jake, you and your partner have to make the decision that is right for YOU and your child, not your friends. The list of options you have posted above reflects total selfishness on behalf of your friends, they have a lot of growing up to do.
The question of marriage is also completely the decision of you and your partner. Your parents' views are their own and are probably tarnished from the expectations of what is 'right' within their own generation. In your generation what is 'right' is that the child is raised by parents with real love and care. If you choose not to marry, they may not be happy with that, but they will still love their grandchild to pieces.
Grandma, July 30th, 2007 at 12:39:21am
You know. If they were real friends, they wouldn't make you do that. It's cruel. Making you choose between them and a poor little baby...
You shouldn't leave her or the baby because it's hell growing up without a father. I know what I'm talking about.
brompton cocktail., July 29th, 2007 at 11:32:18pm
And there are plenty of organizations around the world designed to help people in situations like yours.
whatwasithinking, July 29th, 2007 at 10:54:20pm
You're friends obviously need to grow up, and someday I'm sure they will. For right now you should stay with the baby and your girlfriend because now you're a family. If you leave you'll regret it.
As for your parents, to me abortions are horrible and leaving your girlfriend to raise a baby by herself is horrible, more so than two unmarried people trying to raise a child.
Raising a child of course won't be easy, but I think you realize it is the right thing to do.
whatwasithinking, July 29th, 2007 at 10:53:01pm
Do whatever you think is right and if your friends don't agree with you then you're better off without them.
threeam., July 29th, 2007 at 09:24:02pm
your friends aren't much good at being friends i think. You sound as though you love your girlfriend very much and you feel you are ready to become a dad so why let those people stop you?
I wish you and your girlfriend all the best,
sarah
Sarah!, July 29th, 2007 at 08:34:39pm
Don't leave her and her baby.
Think of that poor child, growing up without a father?
And you did it all because your friends wanted you to?
This is your life and if they can't appreciate what you're doing, it may be time to get new friends.
And I wouldn't get married until you're ready.
My friend went to her own parent's wedding because they didn't get married until having their second child.
Maybe you should talk to your parents about how they're making you feel and just do what you think is right.
Your girlfriend and your child obviously mean a lot to you, I don't think you should give that up because your 'friends' want you to.
Mike Dirnt., July 29th, 2007 at 08:27:23pm
I don't understand how a '17 year old, soon to be father' is selling out. You've got very strange friends.
Anji, July 29th, 2007 at 08:23:43pm