Absolutely the same

You know, you can't seem to have faith in anyone anymore. The more you trust them the harder they let you down. I don't understand how something that can be so obviously right for you could seem so unattractive. Let me explain what I mean... I was tired and had stayed up for 21 hours, a girl all alone standing and stuff happens to catch my eye and before the night is over we're..... fornicating....

So she tells me hours later she has a boyfriend. As bummed out as I was about loosing a something that wild I was complacent. At a friends party the next night we end up seeing each other and doing each other again. After a for more repeat offenses she leave her boyfriend for me. I figure out a ways down the line her family is F#C%ED up. Her mom is a druggy and he dad is a self absorbed abusive little crap. After almost getting shot by her dad, cussed out by her mom, and having half my friends alienated agaist me for still being with her, things finally calm down.

She then decides to leave me for another guy... sh!t right? it gets better. She is leaving me for this guy who Webster thought of when he defined nerd. Now here's how the title works. I was told time and time again that she was trouble simply because her whole family was. Her mom was a prostitute, her sister was a junky, everything about he family was messed up and everyone said that she would be the same way. I know what thats like, and I know how untrue it can be. I have been judged, discriminated, and shut out because of that. My standpoint was I was going to give her the benefit of the doubt, Wrong thing to do! But I couldnt help it, I saw myself in her and I wanted to help her so bad.

You just can't help people that won't help themselves, thats it. I saw my plight in hers and I put too much of myself into trying to help her. She was just so wrapped up in the sex and the wild parties that she didnt see the need for moderation, or restraint. In the end I had to swallow a lot of "I told you so's" and I deserve them. At this age you cannot be serious in any relationship, its just not tactful. You can argue whatever you want but the fact of the matter is a serious realtionship at this age is impossible because you are to wrapped up in the other ones drama and you can't handle it and your own no matter how hard you try. I dare someone to make a lier out of me, but you wont...
Posted on August 14th, 2010 at 11:35pm


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