O.C.D

My hands are all dry and cracked. Everyone who sees them are like ' Urghhhh your hands are manky ' or ' haha, it's cuz of those gothy gloves you wear '

... but it's not. Only I know why.

O.C.D. My hands are sore.

I am obsessed with germs.
I am obsessed with losing things.

Germs.
I wash my hands after touching things. And I mean everything
If I see someone picking their nose, licking their fingers, eating with their mouthes open, eating loud e.t.c... I will basically just scream and have a fit.

Losing things
I look behind me when walking outside, sounds silly. But I'm checking that people haven't dropped anything. When I climb into a car, I always look behind me out the window when we're driving off to see if nothing had fallen out the car. If I lose something I have a panic attack.
I can never enjoy myself now as I'm constantly worrying.

People call me things like ' dirty greeb ' at school. And I almost cry when someone calls me dirty. I'm too clean... but O.C.D makes me dirty on the inside.

I'm not trying to be annoying, I'm simply trying to protect my family, but no, it's not good enough. Because I'm too 'obsessive'. Nobody's perfect. Especially not me.

Nobody probably understands. No one ever understands me, or cares about how I feel.
Posted on May 9th, 2007 at 05:36pm

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