Freak

I mean, I must be, right? I clearly don't enjoy doing the same things that all my friends like to do. Funny how the year when everyone's 18 or 17 going on 18 is the year where everyone's entire lives revolve around when we're going to be drinking next.
I'm 18, and no, I'm not going to be all high and mighty and say well I don't drink, so I'm better. No. I drink, sometimes, but it's not like, the highlight of my life, like it seems to be for all my friends.

Everyone's changed this year, and I'm really getting fed up with it. There was a party a couple weeks ago that I didn't go to because I was out of town, and the stories I'm hearing make me sick. My two best friends got really drunk and made out with eachother, no doubt getting the pants of all our guy friends nice and wet. My best friend was also telling me that she let her guy friend (who's been trying to get with her for 3 years and who she's always turned down) get to like, 3rd base with her.
Excuse me but you're a bunch of FUCKING whores. Under the influence is not an excuse. How did you get like that? Yeah. So excuse me if I'm the ONLY legal teenager around who doesnt think drinking is fun.

Also, everything we do lately seems to revolve around this new friend we met driving us places, cause he's the only one with a car. Robert is a HORRIBLE driver. He drove me home from school once and I'm never getting in a car with him again. He was going 90km/h on a residential road, texts while he drives, and thinks its funny when other people steer for him. So now, its like every plan goes like this "Come on, lets go to _________ tonight! Robert will drive you!" No, okay, just no. I actually happen to value my life (I'm not kidding, this kid is a horrible driver, accident waiting to happen). And now its like theres a few things I havent even been invited to. Just cause I dont want a lift with Robert doesnt mean I don't want to come, I can find another way there.

This disconnect with me and all my friends has been going on all year, and I really wish things hadn't changed. I hear all about things they did without me, and try not to show how much it hurts. I'm also wondering if it's because of my boyfriend...but I've been really careful about not putting him in front of my friends all the time, I did that a few years ago with another one. So with Rob (not the bad driver guy, same name.) I've always been careful to not back out on my friends to hang out with him, I've been good at balancing it.

If there's something about me thats pissing them off then I just wish they'd say it. I never EVER thought I'd say this, but I kind of really miss the way things were in high school =/
Posted on February 20th, 2010 at 10:31am

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