Animal Crackers In My Apple Pie (A Who The Fuck Is Tre Cool Story), chapter 5
Adie wasn't to happy when me and Leanna came to the dooraround 9 o'clock at night with a couple bottles of vodca and pizza but she still let us in. Joey and Jakob were at there aunt's house visiting until tomorrow so it was alright to bring alchohol in the house, as long as we cleaned up the next day (Adie's rules not mine! ).
Anyway after Billie came downstairs we called up Mike amd Burnie (He's a friend of ours we met when we were just starting out in the music carreer and we just kinda stayed in contact plus he has a funny name! ). Within the next half hour everyone was gathered in the living room.
"I wanna watch Scary movie!" Billie whined. Everyone was a bit drunk, well except me and Leanna we were really drunk! I hardly remember where I am! OHH MONKEY! Micheal Jackson's monkey to be exact! I stole him muahah!
"No! I wanna watch The replacements!" Adie yelled. I don't remember much after that except we ended up watching Mean Machine and playing strip poker, the best game ever. So as you can tell everyone was piss ass drunk by the end of the night.
No one went home so we all kind of found a place around the house. In the morning I woke up beside Billie under the table with his feet some how curled up under my head, that is physically impossible! His head is right beside mine! Oh wait those aren't his feet they're Adrienne's! Now time to find Mike!
I went into the kitchen, well I found Burnie anyway... He was sleeping on the counter with his head in the sink... Akward. Mike, hmm where is Mike? I looked in the basement, not there in the dining room in the bathroom.. He was no where! Then I pass the closet and I hear the faintest of snores and and I open the closet the faint snores become really loud, well I found Mike. I closed the door on his head, he didn't wake up amazingly. Now to find Leanna!
Well I really did look everywhere for her, even outside! No sign of her anywhere. It's not even possible thta she could be upstairs because she would have fallen down the stairs like a million times before successfully reaching the top and someone would have woken up. But I guess there is no harm in looking.
I walked into Billie and Adie's room, nope not in there (I feel like Blues Clues! If you don't know what that is it is a kid's show starign a dog and this guy who fidn things in their house. The dog's name is blue heheeh the dog is blue too! ) Billie has to change the colour of his room, it's so depressing! I looked in the spare room, not in there, Jakob's room, not in there. Then I looked in Joey's room, not in there, there was only one room left. Which was technically my room for when ever my ex-wife woudl kick me out for the night.
I opened the door and there she was. The room was jsut as I remembered it, everythign was white or the ocasional red or orange, the blankets and curtains were white and the walls were kind of topy looking. It was almost a shame to wake her up, she looked to peaceful, actually it was a pleasure! I was going to jump on the bed but the floor creeked and her eyes opened really quick. It freaked the shit out of me. Almost as much as when that guy flashed me! I know I am erasistable to both male and female!
"Tre! I was asleep!" She whined... Does she really think I care?
"Aw, I don't care."
"Get out!" She threw a pillow at the door so I grabed it and ran over to her and jimped on the bed.
"Get up! Get up! Up! Up up!"
"Okay!"
"So how did you make it upstairs last night anyway?"
"Please no one can get up the stairs drunk, it's imposible-"
"Like slaming a revolving door, or eating a table whole and living."
"Anyway! I came up here this mornign while everyone was asleep."
"Oh so which funny place did you wake up in?"
"... Ah... Actually I woke up naked in the bush outside. What happened last night?" I knew she was a bad apple. All along I knew it! Muahaha!
"I don't rmemember. Oh but you have to see where Mike and everyone ended up!" I draged her down the stairs and showed her where everyone was. After we had to go find her clothes outside. She was wearing some of my clothes I left there awhile ago, I was wondering where that shirt went to. Anyway but we collected everything and were about to go inside until she stoped me.
"Wait!"
"What?"
"My bra is in the neighbors yard!" I looked over the fence to the pool hahaha it's at the bottom! Good luck trying to get that!
"Oh I like that colour!"
"Thanks but how are we going to get it back?" I stood there for a few minutes pretending to think.
'I got it why don't we hop the fence and dive in and get it?"
"Yeah alright." so on the count of three we both dove in the water and swam around. We made it a bet to see who got it first. I pushed her out of the way underwater but she kicked me in the face and yanked my ear so I pulled her up to the surface with me to get a breath then went under again, she grabbed my shirt and started biting me (Damn that really hurt! ) I wammed her into the wall and went for the bra. Surprisingly she didn't come after me. Oh shit I looked back and she was sinking to the bottom, I guess I shouldn't have shoved her that hard hehe.
Two second after bringing her out of the water she became consciene and slapped me. "Tre you jackass!"
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to push you that hard!" I have her my most cutest looks ever.
"Ugh what ever let's go. Did you get the bra?"
"Oh shit." I dove back in and got it back. "It was either the bra or having a dead person swiming in a pool leave me alone."
"You mean floating by the way."
"Huh?"
"Nevermind." Sometimes she could pass for a mental person... The I remember I have a date tonight! So I will just skip ahead in my wonderful lif eto the date! I can do that cause I'm a drummer and a sexy drummer at that.
We had a lovely time, me and Carol, at first. After awhile I started to see a hole bunch of things I hadn't seen when we first met. Like how her eyebrows are uneven and way to high up on her forehead. Her laugh was absolutely horrible to, it was like a frog croaking.. But more like a chimp squecking. She was also a total ditz! Nothing like I had expected.
I couldn't stand it much more I sat up to try and leave but then somethign came that I jsut couldn't resist! "Diner is served." Said the waiter. Nevermind I can wait.
"Why did you get up?" Carol asked and tilted her head to the side. Another thing I hated about her, she always tilted ehr head when she asked a question.
"Um the bathroom, I can hold it though." she kind of frowned liek I said somethig wrong and started picking at her salad.
What the hell? She has hardly eaten anything and all she ordered was a salad! God is she anorexoc or something?
"So, Carol, what do you do for a living?" that is the stupidest question I have ever asked but I have run out of ideas! She is jsut so simply simple! I hate it!
"I am a hair dresser." that might explain the smell of cheap perfume and hair spray. I had enough.
"Well look at the time, I'll see you soon bye! Oh here it's alright if I left early right? There's the money for the food bye again." And I booked it out the door. Finally freedom!
Anyway after Billie came downstairs we called up Mike amd Burnie (He's a friend of ours we met when we were just starting out in the music carreer and we just kinda stayed in contact plus he has a funny name! ). Within the next half hour everyone was gathered in the living room.
"I wanna watch Scary movie!" Billie whined. Everyone was a bit drunk, well except me and Leanna we were really drunk! I hardly remember where I am! OHH MONKEY! Micheal Jackson's monkey to be exact! I stole him muahah!
"No! I wanna watch The replacements!" Adie yelled. I don't remember much after that except we ended up watching Mean Machine and playing strip poker, the best game ever. So as you can tell everyone was piss ass drunk by the end of the night.
No one went home so we all kind of found a place around the house. In the morning I woke up beside Billie under the table with his feet some how curled up under my head, that is physically impossible! His head is right beside mine! Oh wait those aren't his feet they're Adrienne's! Now time to find Mike!
I went into the kitchen, well I found Burnie anyway... He was sleeping on the counter with his head in the sink... Akward. Mike, hmm where is Mike? I looked in the basement, not there in the dining room in the bathroom.. He was no where! Then I pass the closet and I hear the faintest of snores and and I open the closet the faint snores become really loud, well I found Mike. I closed the door on his head, he didn't wake up amazingly. Now to find Leanna!
Well I really did look everywhere for her, even outside! No sign of her anywhere. It's not even possible thta she could be upstairs because she would have fallen down the stairs like a million times before successfully reaching the top and someone would have woken up. But I guess there is no harm in looking.
I walked into Billie and Adie's room, nope not in there (I feel like Blues Clues! If you don't know what that is it is a kid's show starign a dog and this guy who fidn things in their house. The dog's name is blue heheeh the dog is blue too! ) Billie has to change the colour of his room, it's so depressing! I looked in the spare room, not in there, Jakob's room, not in there. Then I looked in Joey's room, not in there, there was only one room left. Which was technically my room for when ever my ex-wife woudl kick me out for the night.
I opened the door and there she was. The room was jsut as I remembered it, everythign was white or the ocasional red or orange, the blankets and curtains were white and the walls were kind of topy looking. It was almost a shame to wake her up, she looked to peaceful, actually it was a pleasure! I was going to jump on the bed but the floor creeked and her eyes opened really quick. It freaked the shit out of me. Almost as much as when that guy flashed me! I know I am erasistable to both male and female!
"Tre! I was asleep!" She whined... Does she really think I care?
"Aw, I don't care."
"Get out!" She threw a pillow at the door so I grabed it and ran over to her and jimped on the bed.
"Get up! Get up! Up! Up up!"
"Okay!"
"So how did you make it upstairs last night anyway?"
"Please no one can get up the stairs drunk, it's imposible-"
"Like slaming a revolving door, or eating a table whole and living."
"Anyway! I came up here this mornign while everyone was asleep."
"Oh so which funny place did you wake up in?"
"... Ah... Actually I woke up naked in the bush outside. What happened last night?" I knew she was a bad apple. All along I knew it! Muahaha!
"I don't rmemember. Oh but you have to see where Mike and everyone ended up!" I draged her down the stairs and showed her where everyone was. After we had to go find her clothes outside. She was wearing some of my clothes I left there awhile ago, I was wondering where that shirt went to. Anyway but we collected everything and were about to go inside until she stoped me.
"Wait!"
"What?"
"My bra is in the neighbors yard!" I looked over the fence to the pool hahaha it's at the bottom! Good luck trying to get that!
"Oh I like that colour!"
"Thanks but how are we going to get it back?" I stood there for a few minutes pretending to think.
'I got it why don't we hop the fence and dive in and get it?"
"Yeah alright." so on the count of three we both dove in the water and swam around. We made it a bet to see who got it first. I pushed her out of the way underwater but she kicked me in the face and yanked my ear so I pulled her up to the surface with me to get a breath then went under again, she grabbed my shirt and started biting me (Damn that really hurt! ) I wammed her into the wall and went for the bra. Surprisingly she didn't come after me. Oh shit I looked back and she was sinking to the bottom, I guess I shouldn't have shoved her that hard hehe.
Two second after bringing her out of the water she became consciene and slapped me. "Tre you jackass!"
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to push you that hard!" I have her my most cutest looks ever.
"Ugh what ever let's go. Did you get the bra?"
"Oh shit." I dove back in and got it back. "It was either the bra or having a dead person swiming in a pool leave me alone."
"You mean floating by the way."
"Huh?"
"Nevermind." Sometimes she could pass for a mental person... The I remember I have a date tonight! So I will just skip ahead in my wonderful lif eto the date! I can do that cause I'm a drummer and a sexy drummer at that.
We had a lovely time, me and Carol, at first. After awhile I started to see a hole bunch of things I hadn't seen when we first met. Like how her eyebrows are uneven and way to high up on her forehead. Her laugh was absolutely horrible to, it was like a frog croaking.. But more like a chimp squecking. She was also a total ditz! Nothing like I had expected.
I couldn't stand it much more I sat up to try and leave but then somethign came that I jsut couldn't resist! "Diner is served." Said the waiter. Nevermind I can wait.
"Why did you get up?" Carol asked and tilted her head to the side. Another thing I hated about her, she always tilted ehr head when she asked a question.
"Um the bathroom, I can hold it though." she kind of frowned liek I said somethig wrong and started picking at her salad.
What the hell? She has hardly eaten anything and all she ordered was a salad! God is she anorexoc or something?
"So, Carol, what do you do for a living?" that is the stupidest question I have ever asked but I have run out of ideas! She is jsut so simply simple! I hate it!
"I am a hair dresser." that might explain the smell of cheap perfume and hair spray. I had enough.
"Well look at the time, I'll see you soon bye! Oh here it's alright if I left early right? There's the money for the food bye again." And I booked it out the door. Finally freedom!
