Should Corporal punish be imposed?

Most parents are starting to learn how the word 'no' can actually work when used properly, but a large majority just don't use it. Mostly because teenages at this time have parents who were the hippie generation. They opposed any kind of conservative approach to disciplinarianism and were worry-free anti-voilent people. Now, they generally still are. They don't worry much about their kids and they're using non-violent approaches on the rare occasion that the children would actually be disciplined. So when a child has just misbehaved in a really inappropraite way like...had just been completely overcome with a disregard for their parents, maybe smashed stuff up, or maybe shouted insults, or just ignored them completely, I think that the right way to discipline that is to smack them.

A child can't grow up thinking that a slap on the wrist is just getting told off and sent to your room. I think when you grow up you should be pushed to the extremem boundries of your emotions and get really angrry, sad, happy, excited, and feeling completely helpless towards your parents is a healthy emotion when growing up. Whether that's achieved by the parent hitting the child, or the child experiencing a rough family situation or whatever, fine. But most people here, who are fortunate enough to have access to a computer and go onto the internet generally are not from a financially unstable family undergoing major issues. And for most of us here, to not have not been disciplined by your parents is almost a missing opportunity. You have to know what your boundaries are and this is a good way to find out. Your parents giving you a lecture doesn't always get through to most people so if a child needs disciplining, then I think they need to be hit.

Kurtni:

I, personally, don't think there is ever a good reason to hit someone aside from self defense. So, a child behaving badly is not a justified reason to hit someone, I think its just silly that fully grown adults have to resort to a violent level to deal with children. Who is suppose to be the more intelligent person in that situation?

Are you using the fact that cave men used violence to deal with conflicts as a reason to justify what you're saying? Society has progressed and advanced in multiple ways since then, I would seriously hope that we don't still behave as we did in prehistoric times. I think that degrades your arguement quite a bit more than it helps it. I don't know about you, but I learn in all kinds of ways. I don't need someone hitting me to learn something. In all honesty I would learn anything, I'd just fear something that way. We are a much smarter, more developed life form than that. We don't need to control kids with fear.

I don't think parents who spank their kids are horrible people, I think they are highly foolish, but thats another matter. It isn't abuse, it's just stupid and immature. But it's their choice on how they wish to raise their kids as long as they dont't do so in an abusive fashion. But when it's said that spanking is "the right" thing to do, and you have to do it or your kids will be spoiled, I just laugh. You can't justify hitting a little kid, no way. And there are plenty of parents who choose to actually put forth effort in their parenting and don't resort to silly ways of disciplining a child like hitting them.

Society may have progressed, but the evolution of our psychological proccess hasn't changed almost at all. This is how most people accept what is right and what is wrong. And it isn't violence. Hitting your child for misbehaving is not violence. Maybe you have never rebelled much against your parents, maybe you haven't tested the limits which you could go to whilst they controlled your life, but I have and a lot of people I know have and those who have never been hit by there parents are now mostly sitting in some dump with a load of drugs and pretty much getting shit-faced cause they are freaking rich and can't find a future. Their parents never gave a monkey's ass about what they did and now it's too late to care for them.

Parents who care enough about their children are not stupid. They love their kids and will do what it takes to make sure that they can grow up properly. I think you can justify hitting a child. Maybe not you, but there are other people who understand better how to behave if they've been spanked.

K, I do disagree with hitting a child in school. If you're a parent, and you wanna slap your kid for doing something they shouldn't have, fine, that's a different story. But in school, no.

First of all, it disturbs kids. And it encourages obedience out of fear rather than respect. The kids need to be taught to respect their teachers, peers and school rather than "Do it right or I'll bring out the paddle." There are some schools that have corporal punishment here. Apparently, in one school, if you're caught doing something wrong three times, you have to walk back and forth across the school courtyard on your knees. Seems just a tad extreme if you ask me. In other schools, it's common for teachers to throw wooden chalkboard dusters and chalk at students and to box their ears.

lyrical_mess:

K, I do disagree with hitting a child in school. If you're a parent, and you wanna slap your kid for doing something they shouldn't have, fine, that's a different story. But in school, no.

First of all, it disturbs kids. And it encourages obedience out of fear rather than respect. The kids need to be taught to respect their teachers, peers and school rather than "Do it right or I'll bring out the paddle." There are some schools that have corporal punishment here. Apparently, in one school, if you're caught doing something wrong three times, you have to walk back and forth across the school courtyard on your knees. Seems just a tad extreme if you ask me. In other schools, it's common for teachers to throw wooden chalkboard dusters and chalk at students and to box their ears.

Never go to the school my aunt and uncle work at. My uncle is actually the principal. I know this goes against everything I've said about parent-child intimacy and interfering with that, but in the village that I'm from, it's really poor with like 200 people, and everyone is really close, and everyone knows eachother so well it's almost like one big family. That's why parents are OK knowing that their children, when misbehaved at school, are being punished by the teachers. This is an exception for me, because I used to go to that school too. That's my home village, those are my people. It really is one big family, and there are never any disputes between people or arguements, and we all go to the temple to pray, and gather together for special occasions. We all go to the market to buy stuff and we get stuff from eachother and help eachother out. That's why I think it's OK for some teachers like the ones there, to hit the children.

Even if it's a tight knit community and everyone knows each other, violence of any form can and most probably will affect a school environment negatively.

lyrical_mess:

Even if it's a tight knit community and everyone knows each other, violence of any form can and most probably will affect a school environment negatively.

My friend is a dentist now. She won a scolarship, and the rest of her family is under the poverty line.

I think that, well, I know that I saw it as a means of discipline, and I'm sure that other people did too.

huh?

The school is amazingly efficient, especially comparing it to a lot of other schools I've been to. The students are really obedient, yet it's not like we have no life. Usually I oppose this kind of thing, but I know that in this case, it works.

Anji:

Society may have progressed, but the evolution of our psychological proccess hasn't changed almost at all. This is how most people accept what is right and what is wrong. And it isn't violence. Hitting your child for misbehaving is not violence. Maybe you have never rebelled much against your parents, maybe you haven't tested the limits which you could go to whilst they controlled your life, but I have and a lot of people I know have and those who have never been hit by there parents are now mostly sitting in some dump with a load of drugs and pretty much getting shit-faced cause they are freaking rich and can't find a future. Their parents never gave a monkey's ass about what they did and now it's too late to care for them.

Parents who care enough about their children are not stupid. They love their kids and will do what it takes to make sure that they can grow up properly. I think you can justify hitting a child. Maybe not you, but there are other people who understand better how to behave if they've been spanked.

What are you talked about? It's changed greatly! Someone living thousands of years ago may have lacked the ability to comprehend any other methods of communication aside from violence, they didn't know other ways to communicate and teach. Now we do, our minds think it new ways, and we have the ability to teach without resorting to physical means.
I never said my parents didn't spank me, and my personal experiences are pretty irrelevant to this thread. Thats why your argument isn't working. In other posts you keep brining up all these personal points from your own personal life. Your personal life doesn't apply to the rest of the world. And what worked with hitting and physical punishment in your community could have been confronted differently. It is never a need to teach someone with violent measures. It might work, but it is not needed. Parents who don't hit their kids are not idiots who don't care about them. It takes alot more time and effort to parent a child without hitting than it does to just smack them everytime they do something wrong.

Kurtni:

And what worked with hitting and physical punishment in your community could have been confronted differently. It is never a need to teach someone with violent measures. It might work, but it is not needed. Parents who don't hit their kids are not idiots who don't care about them. It takes alot more time and effort to parent a child without hitting than it does to just smack them everytime they do something wrong.

You think that? You think that's it's actually easy to hit your child. You think that most parents in the world would rather hit their children, rather than resorting to other measures? I don't think any parent would like to hit their child at all. Nobody likes to resort to violence, but sometimes it has to be done.

And why don't my personal experiences apply to anything? Is it not valid enough to agrue with because it happened to me?

Anji:

You think that? You think that's it's actually easy to hit your child. You think that most parents in the world would rather hit their children, rather than resorting to other measures? I don't think any parent would like to hit their child at all. Nobody likes to resort to violence, but sometimes it has to be done.

And why don't my personal experiences apply to anything? Is it not valid enough to agrue with because it happened to me?

If they dislike it, they shouldn't do it. It's never needed to hit someone. I love how earlier you told me ..

Anji:

Hitting your child for misbehaving is not violence.

then you say

Anji:

Nobody likes to resort to violence, but sometimes it has to be done

It is never needed to be violent. There are always other options, that parents just choose to neglect because it takes less effort to spank someone than it does to logically reason and think of other punishments. I never said they don't apply to anything, they obviously apply to you, but you can assume that wjat works for you will apply to the rest of the world.

Kurtni:

Anji:

You think that? You think that's it's actually easy to hit your child. You think that most parents in the world would rather hit their children, rather than resorting to other measures? I don't think any parent would like to hit their child at all. Nobody likes to resort to violence, but sometimes it has to be done.

And why don't my personal experiences apply to anything? Is it not valid enough to agrue with because it happened to me?

If they dislike it, they shouldn't do it. It's never needed to hit someone. I love how earlier you told me ..

Anji:

Hitting your child for misbehaving is not violence.

then you say

Anji:

Nobody likes to resort to violence, but sometimes it has to be done

It is never needed to be violent. There are always other options, that parents just choose to neglect because it takes less effort to spank someone than it does to logically reason and think of other punishments. I never said they don't apply to anything, they obviously apply to you, but you can assume that wjat works for you will apply to the rest of the world.

OK, I'm sorry I used to wrong word, but it isn't violence. Neither is it abuse. And maybe what applies to me doesn't apply to the world, but it sure as hell applies to quite a few people. Nobody is ever in the same situation as another person, but just the fact that people can relate should be enough for a topic like this. Just pretty much everyone on this thread has been smacked by their parents, and they think it wan't for good intentions, then why?

But the fact remains: when you hit your child, it induces fear. Maybe a little, maybe a lot. And one would hope that in a society like ours, it would be more reasonable to enfore discipline through respect than through fear and pain.

Suppose there is a girl called Sally who goes to school. And Sally thinks that another girl, Susie, is worthless and stupid and ugly. So Sally spreads rumors about Susie. She says that Susie likes to eat toilet paper and pick her nose. The teacher catches wind of this. There are two possible situations: 1. Try and teach Sally to respect her classmates. 2. Bring out the paddle.

Now, Teach goes with the first solution, Sally learns to respect Susie and due to respect for her classmate, will not spread rumors and be mean. And if the teacher smacks Sally, then Sally will not spread rumors simply because she's afraid of getting hit by the teacher. Okay, either way, Sally leaves Susie alone, but isn't it better that it stops for the right reasons?

it may seem like a good way to instill discipline in kids if you're the parent/ techer, but its not so great if your on the recieving end of it. you can physically and mentally scar someone if they are hit on a regular basis.

People are acting as if hitting someone resolves nothing. And sure, if you think of it like that, it doesn't. But you know why police do it? It enforces system, it shows superiority, and it teaches discipline. You're all talking about society, yet without those, society falls into anarchy.

Yes, but it teaches that one should respect authority and discipline out of fear. There are ways to instill respect in a person that do not involve hitting, especially at school-level.

At the school I used to go to where the teachers hit the kids when they misbehave, none of the students ever feared the teachers. There was a very healthy teacher-student bond actually.

Whatever, but don't we restrict our desires due to fear as well? I mean, if you wanted to steal a car, you know you wouldn't because you'd fear getting in trouble and having a record and being put away for a while? Isn't that how the world works anyways?

But wouldn't it be better if a person didn't steal a car because they respected that it was the owner's property and that he worked for it and stealing is morally wrong?

Anji:

OK, I'm sorry I used to wrong word, but it isn't violence. Neither is it abuse. And maybe what applies to me doesn't apply to the world, but it sure as hell applies to quite a few people. Nobody is ever in the same situation as another person, but just the fact that people can relate should be enough for a topic like this. Just pretty much everyone on this thread has been smacked by their parents, and they think it wan't for good intentions, then why?

I never said it was abusive. Hitting, I consider violent. I don't consider spanking kids abuse, but it's still violent. You're missing the point of everything I've said. Hitting someone for doing wrong is just silly. Resorting to physical means of teaching is so immature and silly compared to what we have the ability to do. Their intentions may have been good (I never said they weren't) but its just ridiculous that to communicate a message to a young child, they have to smack it. We are much more developed forms of life than that. Its basically ignorance if they think it's helping, they don't know any better. However, ignorance to other options is still no excuse for acting like that. It amazes me when you see parents screaming like little kids themselves in grocery stores at kids throwing fits, as if that helps at all. Parents are suppose to behave as the adult in the situation. Using physical punishment because you lack the ability to communicate in any other way is not being very adult like, regardless of if your intentions were good or not.