Pregnant before marriage

AuthorMessage
Lucifers Angel
King For A Couple Of Days
Lucifers Angel
Age: -
Gender: Female
Posts: 4751
December 11th, 2006 at 06:53am
having a baby before being married isnt the end of the world, i fell pregnant before i got married and very nearly didnt get married (the wedding was planned before i got pregnant), if i decided not to marry the child wouldve had all the love and care that i could give him, but i got married and i honestly dont think that being married helps or hinders the child either way.
whatsernamexxx
Geek
whatsernamexxx
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 123
December 11th, 2006 at 08:23am
as long as they know what they're doing i think it's fine even though i dont like people who abort their kids.
worn-out astronaut.
Had A Life Before GSB
worn-out astronaut.
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 28177

Mibba Blog
December 11th, 2006 at 09:51am
My mom was pregnant and then two months before I was born she got married to my dad. I have no problem with that.

I dont have problem with single moms either.

I dont have a problem if a couple doesnt want to get married, but have children.

I dont understand this thread.
Matt Smith
Admin
Matt Smith
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 31134

Mibba Blog
December 11th, 2006 at 11:13am
[Bittersweet] cant fail:

I dont understand this thread.

Basically, sometimes people have a thing called differences in opinion, and this is why we debate things Think
worn-out astronaut.
Had A Life Before GSB
worn-out astronaut.
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 28177

Mibba Blog
December 11th, 2006 at 11:31am
Bloodraine:
[Bittersweet] cant fail:

I dont understand this thread.

Basically, sometimes people have a thing called differences in opinion, and this is why we debate things Think
Wow, RLY?

Laughing

I_worship_tre_Cool:
I think have a child in an unstable situation is not a wise choice. If you arent prepared for a child and Don't have the financial means to care for a child and are not in a secure relationship, then the enviorment is not suitable for a kid.

I Think marriage has absolutely nothing to do with anything I stated above. I Don't think I ever want to get married simply because I dont need a piece of paper to tell me I love someone and its just a hassel.

There are plenty of people who are married that have no bussiness having kids because the enviorment they have is not child friendly. If two people are in a steady reationship and are ready to accept the responability of having a kid, then I think that they have every right to have one. Marriage is not the only way for two people to know that they want to be together.
Exactly.
missand
Geek
missand
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 102

Mibba
March 31st, 2007 at 10:35am
Alot of people think that married couples have the stability, but then they can be just as bad for a child to grow up in. The parents can divorce, the child could feel unwanted but a single parents or a couple who isn't married and still hasn't got anything to do with their father/ mother can easily have the greatest time of all
Flaming Phalanges!
Basket Case
Flaming Phalanges!
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 17669
March 31st, 2007 at 08:03pm
Marriage does not provide stability, love provides stability. You can have love without some horrendously huge ceremony that costs ridiculous amounts of money, and it won't affect the child either way.

My friend's parents never got married, and last year they separated, and the whole thing was made a lot easier by the fact that there were no legal messes over what belonged to who. Her dad moved out, but still lives close by, and her parents get on.

Bitter divorces often mean the parents are going to be resentful of each other for the rest of their lives, and that will affect a child more than just having one parent, or parents that separated without too much stress.

As long as the child has responsible guardians and lots of love then it's fine.
wow-thats-original
Shoot Me, I'm A Newbie
wow-thats-original
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 48

Blog
April 1st, 2007 at 04:55am
Heels Over Head.:
*not trying to offend anybody*

do you think getting pregnant before you are amrried is wrong ..if so any exceptions ???

what do you think ....


im a bastard and sometimes wish my mum and dad got married
PaNcAkEs
Jackass
PaNcAkEs
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 1808

Blog
April 1st, 2007 at 07:12am
i believe that marriage isnt neccessary in order to be happy or to have kids. You just have financial security when you're married. You can have kids without being married, thats what i think. But its better, cause then when the couple ever breaks up or anything, then the father cant ignore his child but has to support her/him and the mother. So everybodys happy. But i dont plan on getting married or having kids, just so you know.
I_Wanna_B_The_Minority
King For A Couple Of Days
I_Wanna_B_The_Minority
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 2321
April 1st, 2007 at 08:49am
In my opinion it doesn't matter whether the parent's are married or not.
The child would still have the same amount of love of it's parent's.
Flaming Phalanges!
Basket Case
Flaming Phalanges!
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 17669
April 1st, 2007 at 09:10am
Velvet Vice:
i believe that marriage isnt neccessary in order to be happy or to have kids. You just have financial security when you're married. You can have kids without being married, thats what i think. But its better, cause then when the couple ever breaks up or anything, then the father cant ignore his child but has to support her/him and the mother. So everybodys happy. But i dont plan on getting married or having kids, just so you know.


You don't necessarily have financial support if you're married. Just because you're married it doesn't mean you have a well paid job.
rehabreject
Jackass
rehabreject
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 1308
April 1st, 2007 at 09:15am
I honestly don't understand why a couple wouldn't want to get married if they're planning on having kids.
Is there some financial or emotional advantage or something?

I've just always thought that marriage is naturally the first step towards building a strong, stable family enviroment Think

Are we talking the religious or legal kind of 'married'?
Flaming Phalanges!
Basket Case
Flaming Phalanges!
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 17669
April 1st, 2007 at 09:29am
rehabreject:
I honestly don't understand why a couple wouldn't want to get married if they're planning on having kids.
Is there some financial or emotional advantage or something?

I've just always thought that marriage is naturally the first step towards building a strong, stable family enviroment Think

Are we talking the religious or legal kind of 'married'?


Sometimes children aren't planned, they just happen. Wink

And some people don't want to get married. I know I don't ever want to get married, but I'll probably end up doing so anyway. I think the fact that it ties you down to one person for the rest of your life (unless you get divorced, but you shouldn't go into marriage thinking 'ah well, we can get a divorce if it goes tits up') is the scariest thing ever.
rehabreject
Jackass
rehabreject
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 1308
April 1st, 2007 at 04:04pm
Flaming Phalanges!:
Sometimes children aren't planned, they just happen. Wink

And some people don't want to get married. I know I don't ever want to get married, but I'll probably end up doing so anyway. I think the fact that it ties you down to one person for the rest of your life (unless you get divorced, but you shouldn't go into marriage thinking 'ah well, we can get a divorce if it goes tits up') is the scariest thing ever.

I realise that Wink and I don't believe unplanned pregnancies can just be solved by a marriage certificate

But isn't having a child with someone much more binding than getting married anyway?
I mean, a marriage is just a piece of paper after all - a child comes with so much more responsibility.
Flaming Phalanges!
Basket Case
Flaming Phalanges!
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 17669
April 1st, 2007 at 07:20pm
rehabreject:
Flaming Phalanges!:
Sometimes children aren't planned, they just happen. Wink

And some people don't want to get married. I know I don't ever want to get married, but I'll probably end up doing so anyway. I think the fact that it ties you down to one person for the rest of your life (unless you get divorced, but you shouldn't go into marriage thinking 'ah well, we can get a divorce if it goes tits up') is the scariest thing ever.

I realise that Wink and I don't believe unplanned pregnancies can just be solved by a marriage certificate

But isn't having a child with someone much more binding than getting married anyway?
I mean, a marriage is just a piece of paper after all - a child comes with so much more responsibility.


Marriage is a celebration of love, and it makes everything that much more serious. It's not JUST a piece of paper...even though I'm not into marriage myself, cos I think it's a waste of time, but for people who do want to get married, it's really important. Marriage also kinda means that you'll both be living together (unless jobs and other circumstances dictate otherwise) whereas parents of a child can live apart, but still look after a child, so it doesn't really matter at all in the long run.
Vanity
King For A Couple Of Days
Vanity
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 4708
April 2nd, 2007 at 03:17am
I don't see anything wrong with being pregnant before marriage. I am, I mean I'm pregnant and unmarried, but I have my boyfriend and my whole family supporting anything I might need until I get a little more settled and everything.
I know not every unmarried couple has it as good as my boyfriend and me. But things like this are always gonna happen. And it's not like it's an entirely bad thing. As long as there are supportive people in the couple's life should a problem rise up, then I see no bad coming from it. And if the couple decides not to stay together, then they won't have wasted $20,000 or $50,000 bucks on a wedding.
rehabreject
Jackass
rehabreject
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 1308
April 3rd, 2007 at 07:39am
Flaming Phalanges!:
Marriage is a celebration of love, and it makes everything that much more serious. It's not JUST a piece of paper...even though I'm not into marriage myself, cos I think it's a waste of time, but for people who do want to get married, it's really important. Marriage also kinda means that you'll both be living together (unless jobs and other circumstances dictate otherwise) whereas parents of a child can live apart, but still look after a child, so it doesn't really matter at all in the long run.
...and having a child is not as serious?

Maybe I phrased myself incorrectly, I do not believe that all there is to marriage is a piece of paper.
I mean, a marriage between an adult couple only concerns the two of them - divorce is always an option if you end up hating eachother.
As soon as you bring a child into the equation, there's a whole other human being who depends on the couple. There's no way out of a responsibility like that.
Flaming Phalanges!
Basket Case
Flaming Phalanges!
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 17669
April 3rd, 2007 at 01:28pm
rehabreject:
Flaming Phalanges!:
Marriage is a celebration of love, and it makes everything that much more serious. It's not JUST a piece of paper...even though I'm not into marriage myself, cos I think it's a waste of time, but for people who do want to get married, it's really important. Marriage also kinda means that you'll both be living together (unless jobs and other circumstances dictate otherwise) whereas parents of a child can live apart, but still look after a child, so it doesn't really matter at all in the long run.
...and having a child is not as serious?

Maybe I phrased myself incorrectly, I do not believe that all there is to marriage is a piece of paper.
I mean, a marriage between an adult couple only concerns the two of them - divorce is always an option if you end up hating eachother.
As soon as you bring a child into the equation, there's a whole other human being who depends on the couple. There's no way out of a responsibility like that.


No, I mean as a couple, going from being boyfriend and girlfriend to husband and wife scares some people shitless. I meant without a child being in that equation.
Babi Kid Rachy
King For A Couple Of Days
Babi Kid Rachy
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 4512
April 4th, 2007 at 05:44am
I think having a baby before marriage is a good thing.
rehabreject
Jackass
rehabreject
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 1308
April 4th, 2007 at 03:32pm
Flaming Phalanges!:

No, I mean as a couple, going from being boyfriend and girlfriend to husband and wife scares some people shitless. I meant without a child being in that equation.
Ah, then we're arguing different things.
I was trying to explain that I thought having kids was a bigger deal than marriage. Never mind. Coffee
Register